The Other Book of World Records

The Other Book of World Records

Ruby and Shorty bolted down the steps of their apartment building. " I jumped on my pogo stick for two hours yesterday, " Shorty said. " Maybe I can get into the Guinness book of world records. " " No, you can't, " Ruby said. “ Not unless you jump for seven-plus hours. Today you're getting into ‘The Other Book of World Records. '"

“ What's that?" Shorty asked. Ruby held up a pad of paper. “ It's the record book I'm working on. The other book, " she said. Outside, Ruby scribbled on her pad, “ WORLD RECORD IN PROGRESS. " She set up the pad beside the crowded basketball court. " I don't have my pogo stick, " Shorty said. " You don't need it, " Ruby said. “ Stand on one leg and recite the ABCs. " " All right, I'll try it, " Shorty said. He stood on one leg and began the alphabet: “ A-B-C-D-E-" The kids playing basketball stopped their game to stare at Shorty.

A kid named Ben called over and gave Shorty a sarcastic smile. “ ABCs, huh?" he said. " What are you in-kindergarten?" " He's setting a record, and he needs to concentrate, " Ruby said. Ben turned to look at Ruby. “ He's setting a record, " Ben said. “ So what's your job?"

" I'm the officiator, " Ruby said. " The what?" Ben asked. " The witness, to prove he really did it, " Ruby said. She grabbed up her pad, flipped several pages, and rattled off a list. " I offer a number of services related to record-setting, actually. They include record consultancy, record training, record-breaking memorabilia, and certificates of participation. "

" Not interested, " Ben said, " and here's a news flash: anyone could do what he's doing. " " Oh, yeah?" Ruby said. " Well, my brother is going to do it while chewing bubble gum. " Ruby pulled out a piece of gum and tossed it to her brother. Shorty popped the gum in his mouth and continued the alphabet, though it was harder to make out the letters: " F-G-H_I_J_K_L-M-N-O-P-" " Aw, that's nothing, " Ben said. " You oughta blow bubbles instead. If you want to set a real record, let me get my pogo stick. " Ben dashed into the building. Shorty winked at Ruby-Ben didn't know that Shorty was a pogo stick master.