Horrid Henry's Chicken

Ha -

哈——

Harried Henry's Chicken. Oh joy! A rapture! It was the last day of school before the Easter break. Henry had been counting down the weeks, then the days, the hours, the minutes. No more school. No more Miss Battle Axe. No more homework. Hello Telly! Hello Crisps! Hello Pajamas all day!

淘气包亨利的鸡。 哦太棒啦！太开心啦！ 今天是复活节假期前的最后一个上学日。 亨利早就开始倒计时了，先是数周，再数天、数小时、数分钟。 再也不用上学，再也不用见战斧老师，再也不用写作业啦。 电视我来啦！薯片我来啦！全天穿睡衣的好日子我来啦！

and hello April Fool's Day soon. Henry had great plans. Salt in the sugar bowl, moving all the clumps forward, mixing shampoo with grass, and making Peter think Fat Fluffy had thrown up. A few pop pop snapper crackers on the loose seat, hanging Peter's underpants on his overhead light. Yippee! Nothing could spoil his happiness. Nothing, nothing, nothing. Not even if Mum insisted he play with Peter every single day. Not even if...

而且很快就到愚人节咯。 亨利已经想好一大堆好玩的主意了。 往糖罐里加盐，把所有积木都挪到门口，洗发水里掺青草碎， 再骗彼得说胖绒绒吐了。 在松动的椅子上放几个摔炮， 把彼得的内裤挂在他的顶灯上。 耶！没什么能破坏他的好心情。 什么都不行，绝对不行，完全不行。 就算妈妈非要他每天都陪彼得玩也没关系。 就算……也没关系。

Squawk, squawk, squawk. Horrid Henry scowled and then he beamed. The holidays meant he wouldn't have to hear that horrible chicken cackle for two whole weeks. Why couldn't his class have a rabbit or a guinea pig or a goldfish as a class pet? Instead they had a chicken. Not just any chicken, a horrible chicken. A huge, horrible, evil chicken. Her name was Dolores. Urgh. Henry trembled just thinking about her mean chickeny eyes and her pointy chickeny feet and her fiery chickeny breath.

嘎——嘎——嘎—— 淘气包亨利皱了皱眉，马上又眉开眼笑。 放假就意味着他足足有两 周不用听到那只讨厌的鸡咯咯叫了。 为什么他们班的班级宠物不能是兔子、天竺鼠或者金鱼呢？ 可他们偏偏养了只鸡。 还不是普通的鸡，是只超级讨厌的鸡。 一只超大、超讨厌、超凶的坏鸡。 她叫多洛雷斯。 呕。 一想到她凶巴巴的小鸡眼、尖尖的小鸡爪，亨利就浑身发抖 还有她那热乎乎臭烘烘的鸡口气。

Horrid Henry was afraid of nothing except injections. The biggest snake, Fooey. The hairiest spider, Bar. But Horrid Henry was terrified of shhh chickens. This was Henry's deepest, darkest secret. Who was scared of a chicken? Who was so...chicken? They were scared of a chicken. Even anxious Andrew happily fed Dolores.

淘气包亨利天不怕地不怕，就怕打针。 再大的蛇？呸，才不怕。 毛再多的蜘蛛？嘁，小意思。 可淘气包亨利最怕——嘘——鸡。 这是亨利藏得最深最不敢说的秘密。 谁会怕一只鸡啊？ 谁会这么……胆小啊？ 也就他会怕一只鸡。 就连容易焦虑的安德鲁都敢开开心心喂多洛雷斯。

But Horrid Henry was sure Dolores was out to get him. Whenever he walked past her coop, she glared. Henry had nightmares about her chasing him with her jabbing, stubbing, pecking beak. Henry shuddered and poked Ralph. I dare you to burp, whispered Henry. Stop burping, Ralph, snapped Miss Battleaxe. I have an important announcement, she added, fixing them with her Medusa glare. Dad, as I know you all are, not to be in school for such a long time. As if, thought Horrid Henry. I'm happy to tell you that one lucky person will be having Dolores for the holidays. I want her, screamed Moody Margaret.

可淘气包亨利确信多洛雷斯就是针对他。 每次他走过鸡笼，她都瞪着他。 亨利还做过噩梦，梦到她追着自己，用尖嘴戳他、啄他、扎他。 亨利打了个寒颤，戳了戳拉尔夫。 你敢打个嗝吗？亨利小声怂恿。 拉尔夫，不许打嗝！战斧老师厉声说。 我有个重要通知要宣布，她补充道，用美杜莎一样的眼神瞪着大家。 我知道你们大家都和我一样开心，这么长时间不用上学。 才怪，淘气包亨利心里嘀咕。 我很高兴地告诉大家，有一个幸运的小朋友可以带多洛雷斯回家过假期。 我要带她回去！暴脾气玛格丽特大喊。