Horrid Henry’s Grump Card

Horrid Henry's grump card. That'd be so good! Shrieked Horrid Henry. Why can't I have a grump card? You have not been good, said Mum. You've been awful, said Dad. No, I haven't, said Henry. Mum sighed. Just today you pinched Peter and called him names. You pushed him off the comfy black chair. You screamed. You wouldn't eat your sprouts. You aside from that, said Horrid Henry. That'd be so good! I deserve a grump card. Henry, said Dad. You know we only give grump cards for exceptionally good behaviour. But I never get one! Howled Henry. Mum and Dad looked at each other.

淘气包亨利的免罚卡。 那可太棒啦！ 淘气包亨利尖叫道。 我为啥不能有一张免罚卡呀？ 你一直都不乖呀。妈妈说。 你可太调皮了。爸爸说。 我才没有呢。亨利说。 妈妈叹了口气。 就今天你还掐了彼得，还给他起外号。 你把他从那张舒服的黑椅子上推了下去。 你还大喊大叫。 你不肯吃球芽甘蓝。 除了这些我都乖呀。淘气包亨利说。 那可太棒啦！ 我就该得一张免罚卡的。 亨利啊。爸爸说。 你知道的，只有表现特别特别好的时候我们才会给免罚卡。 可我从来都没拿到过！ 亨利嚎叫道。 爸爸妈妈对视了一眼。

And why do you think that is? said mum. Because you're mean and unfair and there weren't parents in the world! screamed Horrid Henry. What other reason could there be? A grump card was precious beyond gold and silver and rubies and diamonds. If mum or dad thought you'd behave totally brilliantly above and beyond the call of duty, they gave you a grump card. A grump card meant that you could erase any future punishment. A grump card was a glittering golden get out of jail free ticket. Horrid Henry had never heard a grump card. Just think if he had even one! If dad was in the middle of telling him off or banning him from the computer for a week, all Henry had to do was hand him a grump card. And like magic, the telling off would end. The punishment would be erased and Henry would be back on the computer zapping baddies.

那你觉得这是为啥呀？妈妈说。 因为你们又小气又不公平，全世界就没你们这样的爸妈！ 淘气包亨利尖叫道。 还能有别的原因吗？ 免罚卡比金银、红宝石、钻石还要珍贵。 要是爸妈觉得你表现超级棒，比要求的还好得多， 他们就会给你一张免罚卡。 有了免罚卡，你之后不管要受啥惩罚都能抵消掉。 免罚卡就是一张闪闪发光的金色“免罪券”。 淘气包亨利从来都没得到过免罚卡。 想想看，要是他哪怕有一张都好啊！ 要是爸爸正骂他，或者罚他一周不许玩电脑， 亨利只要递过去一张免罚卡就行。 就像变魔法一样，骂声马上就停了。 惩罚也一笔勾销，亨利就能回去玩电脑打坏人啦。

Horrid Henry longed for a grump card, but how could he ever get one? Even Peter who was always perfect only had seven and he'd never even used a single one What a waste what a total waste Imagine what he could do if he had a grump card He could stuff every sweet and biscuit and treat in the house He could forget all about homework and watch telly instead And best of all if dad ever tried to ban him from the computer or mum shouted that he lost his pocket money for a month All Henry had to do was produce the magic card What bliss What heaven What joy But how could Henry get a grump card? How? How Could he behave totally brilliantly above and beyond the call of duty Horrid Henry considered That was impossible He'd once spent a whole day being perfect and even then had ended up being sent to his room So how else to get a grump card?

淘气包亨利太想要免罚卡了，可他要怎么才能拿到呢？ 就连一向乖巧的完美彼得也只有七张，而且他一张都还没用过呢。 太浪费了，简直是天大的浪费！ 想想看，要是他有一张免罚卡，他能做多少事啊！ 他可以把家里所有的糖果、饼干、好吃的都塞进肚子里。 他可以把作业全抛到脑后，光看电视就行。 最棒的是，要是爸爸要罚他不许玩电脑，或者妈妈吼着说要扣他一个月零花钱， 亨利只要掏出这张魔法卡就搞定了。 太幸福啦！ 简直像在天堂！ 太开心啦！ 可亨利要怎么才能拿到免罚卡呢？怎么拿？ 怎么拿啊？ 他能表现得超级棒，远超要求的程度吗？ 淘气包亨利琢磨了一下。 根本不可能啊。 他有次老老实实乖了一整天，最后还是被打发回自己房间反省了。 那还有啥别的办法能拿到免罚卡呢？

Steal one? Hmm, tempting, very tempting. He could sneak into Peter's room, snatch a grump card or two, then sneak out again. He could even substitute a fake grump card at the bottom in case Peter noticed his stash was smaller. But then Peter would be sure to tell on him when Henry produced the golden ticket to freedom. And mum and dad would be so cross they'd probably double his punishment and ban him from the computer for life.

偷一张？嗯，挺诱人的，太诱人了。 他可以溜进彼得的房间，偷个一两张免罚卡，再悄悄溜出来。 他还可以在卡堆最底下放张假的免罚卡，免得彼得发现他藏的卡少了。 可等亨利掏出这张自由金卡的时候，彼得肯定会告发他的。 而且爸妈会气炸的，说不定会罚他双倍，还一辈子不许他玩电脑。

Or he could kidnap Fluff Puff, Peter's favourite plastic sheep and hold him for ransom. Yes! And then when Peter had ransomed him back, then he could steal him again and again until all Peter's grump cards were his. Yes! He was brilliant! He was a genius! Why had he never thought of this before? Except, if Peter told on him, Henry had a horrible feeling that he would get into trouble. Big, big trouble that not even a grump card could get him out of. Time to think again! Could he swap something for one? What did Henry have that Peter wanted? Comics? No. Quisps? No. Killer -boy rats? CDs? No way. Henry sighed. Maybe he could buy one for Peter. Unfortunately, Horrid Henry never had any money. Whatever pitiful pocket money he ever had always seemed to vanish through his fingers. Besides, who'd want to give that wormy worm a penny? Better yet, could Henry trick Peter into giving him one? Yeah! They could play a great game called Learn to Share. Henry could tell Peter to give him half his grump cards as Peter needed to learn to stop being such a selfish hog. It could work.

要不他可以绑架毛茸茸，就是彼得最爱的那只塑料小羊，然后要赎金。 好主意！ 等彼得把小羊赎回去，他可以一而再再而三地偷，直到彼得所有的免罚卡都归他。 太妙了！他可太聪明了！真是个天才！ 他之前怎么就没想到这个办法呢？ 不过，要是彼得告发他，亨利有种不好的预感，他肯定会遭殃的。 倒大霉，哪怕有免罚卡都救不了他的那种大霉。 得再想想别的办法！ 他能不能拿点东西换一张？ 亨利有啥是彼得想要的呢？ 漫画书？不要。脆趣零食？不要。杀手小子老鼠玩偶？CD？门都没有。 亨利叹了口气。要不他给彼得买一张？ 可惜啊，淘气包亨利从来都没有钱。 他好不容易拿到的那点零花钱，总是转眼就花光了。 再说了，谁愿意给那个小鼻涕虫一分钱啊？ 还有更好的办法，亨利能不能骗彼得给他一张？ 对呀！他们可以玩一个叫“学会分享”的超棒游戏。 亨利可以让彼得把一半的免罚卡给他，就说彼得得改改自私鬼的毛病，要学会分享。 这办法肯定行。