Horrid Henry's Autobiography

Horrid Henry's autobiography. BANG! CRASH! KA -BOOM! Rude Rock bounced on a chair and did his Tarzan impression. Moody Margaret yanked Lady Linda's hair. Linda screamed. Stone Age Stephen stomped around the room grunting, Uncomfortable. Rats about town don't need a gown. Where I'm going only fangs will be showing. Shrieked Horrid Henry. Quiet! But Miss Bethel asked.

《淘气包亨利的自传》 砰！哐！轰隆隆！ 粗鲁洛克在椅子上蹦来蹦去，模仿泰山的样子。 暴脾气玛格丽特拽了琳达小姐的头发，琳达尖叫起来。 石器时代斯蒂芬在房间里跺着脚走来走去，嘴里咕哝着， 好不舒服啊。 城里的老鼠不用穿礼服，我要去的地方只要露尖牙就行。 淘气包亨利尖声叫道。 安静！ 这是贝瑟尔老师的要求。

Rattle down immediately! Ralph found Stephen Stonk, Linda squeaked, Henry shrieked. He was the killer boy rat's new lead singer, blasting his music into the roaring crowd, purling, Henry's pink wet! Bellows Mr. Buckle -A, or playtime is cancelled! For everyone! Horace Henry scowled. Why oh, why did he have to come to school? Why didn't the killer boy rat start a school where you'd do nothing but scream and stomp all day? Now that's the sort of school everyone would want to go to. But no, he had to come here. When he was king, all schools would just teach jousting and spying, and Terminator Gladiator would be head.

马上坐好不许动！ 拉尔夫找到了斯蒂芬·斯通克，琳达吱呀叫，亨利尖声喊。 他是“杀手鼠小子”乐队的新主唱，对着喧闹的人群大声放着音乐， 哗啦一声，亨利的粉色衣服湿了！ 巴克尔先生吼道，不然就取消你们的玩耍时间！ 所有人的都取消！ 霍勒斯·亨利皱起了眉头。 为什么呀，为什么他非得上学啊？ 为什么“杀手鼠小子”不开个学校呢？在那儿你一整天除了尖叫跺脚啥都不用干。 那才是人人都想去的学校嘛。 可偏偏不行，他还得来这儿。 等他当上国王，所有学校只教骑马打斗和秘密侦察， 还让终结者角斗士当校长。

Henry looked at the clock. How could it be only 9 .42? It felt like he'd been sitting here for ages. What a gift to be lounging right now on the comfy black chair, eating crisps and watching Pog House. Today we have a very exciting project, said Miss Battle Axe.

亨利看了看时钟。 怎么才9点42分啊？ 他感觉自己都在这儿坐了好几个世纪了。 要是现在能窝在舒服的黑椅子上，吃着薯片看《波格小屋》，那该多爽啊。 "今天我们有个非常有意思的活动。"战斧老师说道。

Henry groaned. Miss Battleaxe's idea of an exciting project and his were never the same. An exciting project would be building a time machine, or a let's see who can give Henry the most chocolate competition, or counting how many times he could hit Miss Battleaxe with a water balloon. We'll be writing autobiographies, said Miss Battleaxe. Ha! He knew it would be something boring. Horrid Henry hated writing, or pushing a pen across a piece of paper. Writing always made his hand ache. Writing was hard, heavy work. Why did Miss Battleaxe try to torture him every day? Didn't she have anything better to do? Henry groaned again.

亨利嘟囔起来。战斧老师觉得有意思的活动，跟他想的从来都不是一回事。 有意思的活动得是造个时光机啊，或者办个“谁给亨利的巧克力最多”大赛啊， 或者数数他用水气球能砸中战斧老师多少次。 "我们要写自传。"战斧老师说。 哈！他就知道肯定是啥无聊的事。 淘气包亨利最讨厌写字了，就是拿笔在纸上划来划去的那种。 写字总写得他手疼，简直是又累又烦的苦差事。 为什么战斧老师每天都要折磨他呀？她就没别的更好的事可做吗？ 亨利又嘟囔了一声。

An autobiography means the story of your life, continued Miss Battleaxe, glaring at him with her evil red eyes. Everyone would write a page about themselves and all the interesting things they've done. Yawn. Could his life get any worse? What, a page? A whole entire page? What could be more boring than writing on and on about himself? Wait a minute. He got to write about himself? The world's most fascinating boy? He could write for hours about himself. Days. Weeks. Years. Hold on. What was batty old Miss Battleaxe saying now?

"自传就是你自己的人生故事。"战斧老师接着说，一边用 她那恶狠狠的红眼睛瞪着他。 每个人都要写一页纸，介绍自己还有自己做过的所有有趣的事。 打哈欠 他的日子还能更倒霉一点吗？ 什么，一页纸？ 满满一整页？ 还有什么比没完没了写自己的事更无聊的啊？ 等等哦。 他可以写自己的事？ 全世界最有意思的小男孩？ 他写自己的事能写好几个小时呢。 好几天都行。 好几周都没问题。 写几年都可以。 等一下。 疯疯癫癫的战斧老太太现在又在说啥呢？