Horrid Henry Wakes the Dead

Horrid Henry Wakes the Dead ‘No, no, no, no, no! ' shouted Miss Battle-Axe. ‘Spitting is not a talent, Graham. Violet, you can't do the Can- Can as your talent. Ralph, burping to the beat is not a talent. ' She turned to Bert. ‘What's your talent?' ‘I dunno, ' said Beefy Bert. ‘And what about you, Steven?' said Miss Battle-Axe grimly. ‘Caveman, ' grunted Stone-Age Steven. ‘Ugg! ’

Horrid Henry had had enough. ‘Me next! ' shrieked Horrid, Henry. ‘I've got a great talent! Me next! ’ ‘Me! ’ shrieked Moody Margaret. ‘Me! ’ shrieked Rude Ralph. ‘No one who shouts out will be performing anything, ' said Miss Battle- Axe. Next week was Horrid Henry's school talent show. But this wasn't an ordinary school talent show. Oh no. This year was different. This year, the famous TV presenter Sneering Simone was choosing the winner.

But best and most fantastic of all, the prize was a chance to appear on Simone's TV programme Talent Tigers. And from there . . . well, there was no end to the fame and fortune which awaited the winner. Horrid Henry had to win. He just had to. A chance to be on TV! A chance for his genius to be recognised, at last. The only problem was, he had so many talents it was impossible to pick just one. He could eat crisps faster than Greedy Graham. He could burp to the theme tune of Marvin the Maniac. He could stick out his tongue almost as far as Moody Margaret. But brilliant as these talents were, perhaps they weren't quite special enough to win. Hmmmm . . . Wait, he had it.

He could perform his new rap, ‘I have an ugly brother, ick ick ick/ A smelly toad brother, who makes me sick. 'That would be sure to get him on Talent Tigers. ‘Margaret! ’ barked Miss Battle-Axe, ‘what's your talent?' ‘Susan and I are doing a rap, ' said Moody Margaret.

What? ‘I'm doing a rap, ' howled Henry. How dare Margaret steal his idea! ‘Only one person can do a rap, ' said Miss Battle-Axe firmly. ‘Unfair! ’ shrieked Horrid Henry. ‘Be quiet, Henry, ' said Miss Battle- Axe. Moody Margaret stuck out her tongue at Horrid Henry. ‘Nah nah ne nah nah. ' Horrid Henry stuck out his tongue at Moody Margaret. Aaaarrgh! It was so unfair. ‘I'm doing a hundred push-ups, ' said Aerobic Al. ‘I'm playing the drums, ' said Jazzy Jim. ‘I want to do a rap! ' howled Horrid Henry. ‘Mine's much better than hers! ’ ‘You have to do something else or not take part, ' said Miss Battle-Axe, consulting her list.