51 Table Guy

51 Table Guy Rockwell grabbed a leg and, with the help of Table Guy, hauled himself on to the sideboard. Then, between the two of them, they lifted Peanut, Little-Bit and Doodle up just before Lulu Kawaii could get to them. The furious panda snatched at their feet but she was too late. 'CODE PURPLE! CODE PURPLE!' she roared. 'THE CONSPIRATORS ARE ESCAPING!' 'By the wonder of wood!' shouted Table Guy. ' Let's fly!' The great table train rose several metres higher into the air before rapidly soaring away from the Cute Quarter. Peanut watched, helpless, as the Spire appeared to grow smaller,

the further away they flew. ' Sorry, Dad. We were so close,' she whispered. The five of them were crammed very tightly together on top of the sideboard. 'We can't all stay on this!' declared the muscle-bound superhero, heroically. 'We will soon start to descend! I have provided a table for each of you! Assume your positions!' Doodle hopped across on to the bedside cabinet, Little-Bit the writing desk, Peanut the dresser and Rockwell the coffee table. They all crouched in a surfing position, as demonstrated by Table Guy. Rockwell was smiling. "By the wonder of wood"?' He laughed. 'Is that your catchphrase?' 'It is!' Table Guy nodded, looking pleased. Every sentence he said seemed to finish with an exclamation mark. I'm not being funny, but were you last in the queue when they were handing out the superpowers?' Rockwell, don't be so rude!' shouted Little-Bit. 'Don't forget, Table Guy has just saved us.' 'The small one is correct!' said Table Guy in his deep baritone. 'That being said, you were also correct! I was very near to the end of the queue! On power-giving day, my alarm clock didn't go off and I overslept! By the time it was my turn, the cool powers— invisibility, telekinesis, shark senses— had all gone! It was either having total command over items of

furniture or being able to make really good balloon animals! I chose tables!' Rockwell's laughter was infectious. Soon all three children were giggling. Even Table Guy cracked a smile. Yes! It is quite funny, I suppose! But at least I got a half-decent outfit! You should see what Cheese Girl has to wear! Stinky!' 'So, when did you join the Resistance?' asked Peanut. Only a few weeks ago! Most of my fellow heroes have turned a blind eye to what Mr White has been doing over the years! They figure the worse it gets, the more hero jobs there will be for them! But it's flawed logic! Once the Big X hits, everything will be totally destroyed, the residents will have to leave and there will be nothing for anybody to protect! I just couldn't live with it any more! I decided I had to do something!' 'So Mrs M got word to you about our mission?' 'She did!' 'So why are we flying away from the Spire?' 'You have initiated a Code Purple!' Table Guy looked back over his shoulder. ' The panda will have photographed your faces and by now she will have sent your picture to every

single RAZER in Chroma! Currently, you are the four most wanted people in town! We need to let the heat die down!' They were flying directly over the tall glass buildings running parallel with the Strip that they had seen from afar earlier. 'Superhero Heights,' said Peanut. 'Correct!' said Table Guy. Far below, they saw several brightly dressed people flying, climbing, running and swinging their way through the streets. 'Look at them! Revelling in the high crime levels! What's heroic about that?' Table Guy shook his head. 'What they should really be doing is stopping crime at its root! They are cowards!' After a few minutes, the city below them slowly started to transform into suburbia and the unlikely group began their descent. Peanut looked to her right. She saw trees. She saw ponds. She saw flowers. It looked... safe. 'When we land, I am going to leave you at the edge of

the Light District!' declared Table Guy. 'Peanut, you will draw disguises for your companions! You will find a safe place and rest for the night! In the morning, you will travel straight across the northern edge of the ponds and enter Vincent Fields! Look for the Yellow House! Someone will be there to meet you!' A few minutes later, all five tables coasted towards the ground and gently touched down. 'Table Guy, I'm sorry for laughing at you,' said Rockwell. 'You are the bravest superhero I've ever met. OK, you're the only superhero I've ever met, but you're also the bravest. 'There is no need to apologise, citizen! And there is no need to thank me either! We are on the same team!' He looked into the distance. 'Always remember the great things of tomorrow arise from the ashes of today!' He looked thoughtful, his quiff blowing slightly in the wind. Another thing to always remember once you choose hope, everything is possible!' Dramatic pause. 'Oh, and one final thing to always remember while there is good and there is evil in this universe, there are also tables! And mankind will always need tables!' He saluted, climbed aboard his sideboard, and flew off into the sunset. 'That's quite a lot of things to always remember,' said Little-Bit.