1 Detention

Part One in which peanut learns some surprising truths

第一部分：花生在这里得知了一些惊人的真相

1 Detention I must not draw pictures of fire-breathing vampire unicorns in my physics exercise book. Peanut Jones had just written that sentence for the four hundred and ninety-sixth time. It had taken nearly two hours and had left her with a huge lump on the middle finger of her left hand. Apart from her teacher, Mr Dawkins, she was the last person left in the entire school. She raised her arm. "Sir, I've finished. Dawkins looked up from his crossword, crumbs of salt-and-vinegar Chipsticks decorating his black beard. "We'll see about that, Pernilla," he sneered. He walked over to her desk and started flicking through the large pile of paper in front of her.

1 留校检讨：我绝对不能在物理练习本上画会喷火的吸血鬼独角兽 花生·琼斯刚刚写完这句话，这已经是第四百九十六遍了 这花了将近两个小时，她左手中指都磨出了一个大肿包 整所学校里，除了老师道金斯先生，就只剩下她一个人了 她举起了手 “老师，我写完了 道金斯从填字游戏上抬起头，黑胡子上还沾着盐醋味薯条屑 “那得检查检查，佩妮拉，”他嗤笑着说 他走到她的桌前，开始翻阅她面前那一大摞纸

Peanut was so annoyed, she could feel her face turning red. She hated it when people called her that. Her birth certificate might say "Pernilla Anne Jones', but she'd been "Peanut" since she was born. Since before she was born, actually. Her dad had often told her, "When your mum was a couple of months pregnant, the internet said that you were about the size of a peanut. So that's what you became known as: Peanut." It's what everyone at Melody High, her old school, had called her, but that was too much to expect from Death Breath Dawkins. He waved the sheets of paper at her triumphantly. "You have filled exactly thirty-one sides of A4. Given that a maximum of sixteen lines can be written on each page, simple

花生气坏了，她能感觉到自己的脸涨得通红 她最讨厌别人这么叫她了 她的出生证明上虽然写着“佩妮拉·安妮·琼斯”，但她从出生起就叫“花生” 其实早在她出生前，大家就这么叫她了 她爸爸常跟她说：“你妈妈怀孕几个月的时候，网上说你那时候差不多只有一颗花生那么大 所以大家就一直叫你花生啦” 她以前的学校旋律高中所有人都这么叫她，但别指望“口臭死神”道金斯会这么叫 他得意洋洋地朝她挥着那叠纸 “你整整写了三十一面A4纸 考虑到每页最多能写十六行，简单

arithmetic tells me that you have only completed four hundred and ninety-six of the five hundred you were charged with writing. That is 99.2 per cent of your target. As you know, any pupil lucky enough to attend St Hubert's School for the Seriously Scientific and Terminally Mathematic is expected to fulfil every aspect of all tasks that they undertake. One. Hundred. Per cent. In this instance, it is clear that you are 0.8 per cent short of hitting that target. A smug smile was developing somewhere behind his crisp-littered beard. As punishment for trying to get away with doing less work, not only will you complete the task in full, but you will also write an extra hundred lines. That should give me enough time to finish my crossword, eat this Scotch egg and get home in time for University Challenge. "But, sir "No buts, Jones. Get it done. I don't know what kind of namby-pamby slacking they tolerated at your previous school, but you need to realise that precision is important. Frivolous creativity has no place at St Hubert's. No place at all.

计算就能得出，要求你写五百遍，你只完成了四百九十六遍 这只达到了你目标的百分之九十九点二 你也知道，能进入圣休伯特硬核科学与终极数学学校的学生，必须完成任务的每一项要求 一 百 分之百 很明显，这次你还差百分之零点八才能达标 他沾着薯片屑的胡子后面，渐渐浮出一抹自得的笑 作为对你偷工减料蒙混过关的惩罚，你不光要补完任务，还要多罚写一百遍 这样我就有足够时间填完填字游戏，吃掉这个苏格兰蛋，还能赶回家看《大学挑战赛》 “可是，老师——”“别说但是，琼斯 赶紧写完 我不知道你以前的学校容忍了什么样松垮偷懒的行为，但你必须清楚，精准至关重要 瞎闹的创造力在圣休伯特没有容身之地 半点儿容身之地都没有