2 Aunt Marge’s Big Mistake

CHAPTER TWO Aunt Marge's Big Mistake Harry went down to breakfast next morning to find the three Dursleys already sitting around the kitchen table. They were watching a brand-new television, a welcome-home-for-the-summer present for Dudley, who had been complaining loudly about the long walk between the fridge and the television in the living room. Dudley had spent most of the summer in the kitchen, his piggy little eyes fixed on the screen and his five chins wobbling as he ate continually. Harry sat down between Dudley and Uncle Vernon, a large, beefy man with very little neck

第二章玛姬姑妈的大错误第二天早上哈利下楼吃早饭时，发现德思礼一家三口已经围坐在厨房的桌子旁了。 他们正在看一台崭新的电视机，这是送给达力的欢迎他回家过暑假的礼物。达力一直在大声抱怨从客厅的冰箱到电视机之间走得太远。 整个夏天，达力大部分时间都待在厨房里，他那猪一样的小眼睛盯着屏幕，不停地吃东西，他的五个下巴摇摇晃晃。 哈利在达力和弗农姨父之间坐了下来。弗农姨父是个粗壮的大个子，脖子很细

and a lot of moustache. Far from wishing Harry a happy birthday, none of the Dursleys gave any sign that they had noticed Harry enter the room, but Harry was far too used to this to care. He helped himself to a piece of toast and then looked up at the newsreader on the television, who was halfway through a report on an escaped convict. '…the public is warned that Black is armed and extremely dangerous. A special hotline has been set up, and any sighting of Black should be reported immediately.' 'No need to tell us he's no good,' snorted Uncle Vernon, staring over the top of his newspaper at the prisoner. 'Look at the state of him, the filthy layabout! Look at his hair!' He shot a nasty look sideways at Harry, whose untidy hair had always been a source of great annoyance to Uncle Vernon. Compared to the man on the television, however, whose gaunt face was surrounded by a matted, elbow-length tangle, Harry felt very well groomed indeed. The newsreader had reappeared.

还有很多胡子。德思礼一家不但没有祝哈利生日快乐，而且没有一个人表示他们注意到哈利进了房间，但哈利对此已经习以为常，根本不在乎。 他随便吃了一片吐司，然后抬头看了看电视上的新闻播音员，他正在播报一名逃犯的新闻。 “……公众被警告，布莱克携带武器，极其危险。 已经设立了一条特别热线，任何看到布莱克的人都应该立即报告。“用不着告诉我们他不好。”弗农姨父哼了一声，眼睛越过报纸上方盯着那个囚犯。 “看看他的样子，这个肮脏的懒汉！”看他的头发！”他恶狠狠地瞥了哈利一眼，他那蓬乱的头发一直是弗农姨父的心头大烦。 不过，和电视上那个瘦削的脸上缠着一绺长到胳膊肘的头发的男人相比，哈利觉得自己打扮得确实很得体。 新闻播音员又出现了。

'The Ministry of Agriculture and Fisheries will announce today–' 'Hang on!' barked Uncle Vernon, staring furiously at the newsreader. 'You didn't tell us where that maniac's escaped from! What use is that? Lunatic could be coming up the street right now!' Aunt Petunia, who was bony and horse-faced, whipped around and peered intently out of the kitchen window. Harry knew Aunt Petunia would simply love to be the one to call the hotline number. She was the nosiest woman in the world and spent most of her life spying on her boring, law-abiding neighbours. 'When will they learn,' said Uncle Vernon, pounding the table with his large purple fist, 'that hanging's the only way to deal with these people?' 'Very true,' said Aunt Petunia, who was still squinting into next door's runner-beans. Uncle Vernon drained his teacup, glanced at his watch and added, 'I'd better be off in a minute, Petunia, Marge's train gets in at ten.'

“今天，农林部将公布——”“等一下！弗农姨父怒目瞪着新闻播音员，吼道。 “你没告诉我们那个疯子是从哪儿逃出来的！”那有什么用？ 疯子可能正在这条街上走来！”佩妮姨妈骨瘦如柴，长着一张马脸，她猛地转过身来，专注地从厨房的窗户往外看。 哈利知道佩妮姨妈一定很乐意拨打热线电话。 她是世界上最爱管闲事的女人，一生中大部分时间都在监视她那些无聊、守法的邻居。 “他们什么时候才能明白，”弗农姨父说着，用他那紫色的大拳头敲着桌子，“对付这些人只有绞刑？“说得很对。”佩妮姨妈说，她仍然眯着眼睛盯着隔壁的豆角。 弗农姨父喝干了茶杯里的水，看了看表，又说：“我最好马上就走，佩妮，玛姬的火车十点钟到。”

Harry, whose thoughts had been upstairs with the Broomstick Servicing Kit, was brought back to earth with an unpleasant bump. 'Aunt Marge?' he blurted out. 'Sh-she's not coming here, is she?' Aunt Marge was Uncle Vernon's sister. Even though she was not a blood relative of Harry's (whose mother had been Aunt Petunia's sister), he had been forced to call her 'Aunt' all his life. Aunt Marge lived in the country, in a house with a large garden, where she bred bulldogs. She didn't often stay in Privet Drive, because she couldn't bear to leave her precious dogs, but each of her visits stood out horribly vividly in Harry's mind. At Dudley's fifth birthday party, Aunt Marge had whacked Harry around the shins with her walking stick to stop him beating Dudley at musical statues. A few years later, she had turned up at Christmas with a computerised robot for Dudley and a box of dog biscuits for Harry. On her last visit, the year before Harry had started at Hogwarts, Harry had accidentally trodden on the paw of her favourite dog. Ripper had chased Harry

哈利的思绪一直在楼上和飞天扫帚维修工具箱在一起，随着一声不愉快的撞击，他被带回了地面。 “玛姬姑妈?他脱口而出。 “她——她不会来这儿吧，是吗？”玛姬姑妈是弗农姨父的妹妹。 虽然她不是哈利的血亲（哈利的母亲是佩妮姨妈的妹妹），但他一生都被迫叫她“姨妈”。 玛姬姑妈住在乡下，有一所带大花园的房子，她在那里养牛头犬。 她不常住在女贞路，因为她舍不得离开她珍爱的狗，但她的每次来访都在哈利的脑海里留下可怕的印象。 在达力的五岁生日聚会上，玛姬姑妈用手杖打了哈利的小腿，不让他在音乐雕像上打败达力。 几年后，她在圣诞节出现了，给达力带来了一个电脑化的机器人，给哈利带来了一盒狗饼干。 她上次来的时候，也就是哈利在霍格沃茨上学的前一年，哈利不小心踩到了她最喜欢的狗的爪子。 开膛手追着哈利

out into the garden and up a tree, and Aunt Marge had refused to call him off until past midnight. The memory of this incident still brought tears of laughter to Dudley's eyes. 'Marge'll be here for a week,' Uncle Vernon snarled, 'and while we're on the subject,' he pointed a fat finger threateningly at Harry, 'we need to get a few things straight before I go and collect her.' Dudley smirked and withdrew his gaze from the television. Watching Harry being bullied by Uncle Vernon was Dudley's favourite form of entertainment. 'Firstly,' growled Uncle Vernon, 'you'll keep a civil tongue in your head when you're talking to Marge.' 'All right,' said Harry bitterly, 'if she does when she's talking to me.' 'Secondly,' said Uncle Vernon, acting as though he had not heard Harry's reply, 'as Marge doesn't know anything about your abnormality, I don't want any–any funny stuff while she's here. You behave yourself, got me?'

到了花园里，爬上了一棵树，而玛姬姑妈直到午夜过后才把他叫走。 想起这件事，达力的眼里仍然充满了笑的泪水。 “玛姬要在这儿住一个星期，”弗农姨父咆哮道，“既然说到这里，”他伸出一个胖乎乎的手指，威胁地指着哈利，“在我去接她之前，我们得把一些事情弄清楚。”达力得意地笑了笑，把目光从电视机上移开。 看哈利被弗农姨父欺负是达力最喜欢的娱乐方式。 “首先，”弗农姨父咆哮道，“你跟玛姬说话的时候，脑子里要保持礼貌。“好吧，”哈利痛苦地说，“如果她跟我说话的时候是这样的话。”“其次，”弗农姨父说，好像没听见哈利的回答，“玛姬对你的反常情况一无所知，所以她在这里的时候，我不想要任何——任何有趣的东西。” 你要规矩点，明白吗？”

'I will if she does,' said Harry through gritted teeth. 'And thirdly,' said Uncle Vernon, his mean little eyes now slits in his great purple face, 'we've told Marge you attend St Brutus's Secure Centre for Incurably Criminal Boys.' 'What?' Harry yelled. 'And you'll be sticking to that story, boy, or there'll be trouble,' spat Uncle Vernon. Harry sat there, white-faced and furious, staring at Uncle Vernon, hardly able to believe it. Aunt Marge coming for a week-long visit–it was the worst birthday present the Dursleys had ever given him, including that pair of Uncle Vernon's old socks. 'Well, Petunia,' said Uncle Vernon, getting heavily to his feet, 'I'll be off to the station, then. Want to come along for the ride, Dudders?' 'No,' said Dudley, whose attention had returned to the television now that Uncle Vernon had finished threatening Harry.

“如果她愿意，我就愿意。”哈利咬紧牙关说。 “第三，”弗农姨父说，他那张紫色的大脸上露出了两条刻薄的小眼睛，“我们已经告诉玛姬，你在圣布鲁图斯少男收容所上学。“什么?”哈利喊道。 “你要坚持你的说法，孩子，不然你就有麻烦了。” 哈利坐在那里，脸色煞白，怒不可遏，瞪着弗农姨父，简直不敢相信。 玛姬姑妈要来拜访他一个星期——这是德思礼一家送给他的最糟糕的生日礼物，除了弗农姨父的那双旧袜子。 “好了，佩妮，”弗农姨父说着，沉重地站了起来，“那么我要去车站了。 想一起去兜风吗，达力？“没有。”达力说，既然弗农姨父已经威胁完了哈利，他的注意力又回到了电视机上。