Chapter 8

8 The Chapter Which I, Dave Pigeon, Have Decided To Call CHAPTER EIGHT You know that's the same title, right? Of course it isn't. The bit where it says 'CHAPTER EIGHT' looks much more chaptery. It looks exactly the same.

skipper, stop beak-flapping. There are pigeons out there waiting for this book, desperate to find out what happens next, and you are wasting time. We were safely back in the shed. Mean Cat was pacing in front of the shed door. She was snarling and spitting and mad as a bagel-starved pigeon. Thanks to Dave's flowerpot lock she hadn't been able to get back into the Human Lady's house. And for the moment she couldn't get into the shed either. 'What was the plan once I lured her out?' I asked.

'I hadn't thought that far,' Dave said, panicked. 'I didn't think your plan would actually work. He marched up and down, flapping his good wing and jumping every time we heard Mean Cat yowl at the door. 'We need a cannon,' he screeched. 'We can launch her off into space!' 'We don't have a cannon.' 'You'll have to go inside the Human Lady's house and get one.' 'I'm not going out there with that cat on the loose!' I cried. 'Plus you don't even know if there is a cannon in the house.' 'Well, you'll have to go out there anyway,' Dave squeaked. 'I forgot to pick up our dinner from the garden.'

Out on the grass was a huge wedge of crusty, crumbly bread. And a very wet, angry cat circling it. 'I risked my life, and you couldn't even manage to think of a plan to get rid of Mean Cat—'

'I told you my cannon plan,' Dave butted in. '—and on top of that, you dropped the dinner?!' I continued. 'I've only got one wing, Skipper!' He tottered off, his feathers at their hufflest fluffiest. My stomach gurgled as I looked at the bread. Dave's stomach growled back from the other side of the shed. 'Sorry,' he grumbled. I ignored him. Dave awkwardly flapped back across the shed and stood behind me. 'I said I'm sorry.' He hopped in front of me. His eyes were

wide and teary. 'Friends?' 'Friends,' I sighed. 'I didn't mean to leave our dinner out there.' 'I know.' 'I promise I'll find a way to get rid of her,' he said. 'Cross my heart and hope to fly, stick a peanut in my eye.' That's not how it goes, by the way. Yes, it is. It's the Pigeon's Promise. It's supposed to be 'Cross my heart and hope to fly, above the clouds, in the sky!