5 Awooga awooga awooga awooga awooga!

CHAPTER FIVE Awooga awooga awooga awooga awooga! Nancy was strolling back to the fox den in the dusk. 'Oi, oi!' said a voice in the shadows. 'Fancy some company?' It was her big bro Rufus, who had an enormous grin on his face. He always looked like he had just woken up from the best nap ever. 'Where did you go?' asked Nancy. 'You missed all the drama. Sharon's lost her mojo. She's not a party crow any more.' 'I heard,' said Rufus, nibbling on a blade of long grass. 'There's always something nutty going on around here, isn't there?' Nancy gave a little chuckle and nodded. 'Yeah. I like it though.' 'You ever miss the city?' said Rufus. Nancy thought about it for a while.

'I miss my mates, Bin and Hedge. I miss my mobile phone. And I miss the leftover Speedy Chicken meal deals by the bins.' 'Aaaaah,' said Rufus, wistfully. 'I tell you what I miss. The cheesy garlic bread from Sammy's Pizza Parlour.' 'Cor,' grinned Nancy. 'You're making me hungry.' 'I make a decent pizza, actually,' said Rufus. 'Why don't you and the kid come to mine for dinner?' Rufus lived in a tent not far from the Swamp of Despair. It was basic, but cosy. Every night he would light a fire, and sometimes Ted and Nancy would sit around it, make toast on the flames and listen to Rufus's wild stories from his days as a travelling fox. 'Ted says he wants to stay by Sharon's bedside with Willow and Titus tonight,' said Nancy. 'So I've left him to it. Thanks, though.' It had started to rain a little, and their fur was getting cold and damp. 'Rufus,' said Nancy, after a while. 'Have you thought about moving into the den? With me and Ted? Cos he and I chatted about it the other day.' 'Oh, really?' said Rufus, glancing at Nancy a little nervously. 'Yeah,' she said. 'And we both decided that… we wouldn't mind. You know. If you moved in.' Rufus grinned. 'Really? Well, I'm chuffed to hear it, Nance!' he said. 'You don't know how chuffed! But the thing is… that den's really not big enough for the three of us, is it?'

'Yeah, I spose not. Oh well, no worries,' said Nancy, pretending not to care. They kept walking. 'What's that?' said Rufus, pointing into the distance. Nancy tried to see what he was looking at and spotted something strange. Was it a little house? She could make out something blue and red, with flashes of gold. They were not far from Twinklenuts Forest and could hear the gentle trickle of water flowing from the nearby Crystal Lake. 'I dunno,' said Nancy. 'Come on, let's check it out.' The foxes clambered towards the mysterious object, weaving their way through a large patch of spiky, unwelcoming bracken and grass. As they got closer, the grass disappeared and they began wading through muddy water. 'I always wondered where the stream was,' chuckled Rufus. 'What do you mean?' said Nancy. 'How did you know there was a stream?' 'Well, if there's a lake, there's usually a river or a stream near it,' said Rufus. 'Also, I can remember me and Dad floating paper boats down a stream when I was a little fox cub.' 'Wow!' said Nancy. 'Really?' Rufus nodded. They waded through reeds and mud until they reached the blue and red thing. Buried beneath thick clumps of grass and leaves was what looked like a boat of some kind. 'Oh, my giddy goat,' said Rufus, adjusting his cap. 'I can't believe it. It's a narrowboat!'

He waded quickly towards it and started pulling away the clumps of dead branches that were piled on top of it. Nancy helped. The boat was mainly painted dark blue, with red strips around the windows and edges. There was faded gold lettering on the side, but it was hard to read what they once spelt out. Nancy ran her paw across the side of the boat and a load of mud and sand came with it. Rufus grabbed a tatty bit of rope that was tied to the front of the boat and started to pull. 'Give her a push, Nance. Let's get this boat out of the water!' With much heaving and ho-ing, the two foxes eventually dragged the narrowboat… absolutely nowhere. 'I know who can help us,' grinned Nancy. 'Wait here, OK?' Rufus nodded and clambered aboard the small boat. It clearly hadn't been used for a long time. He peered through one of the windows and could just about make out a small stove, sink and a little table. 'Cor!' he said to himself. Then he lifted up his cap and took out a harmonica. He perched on the edge of the boat and started to play a little tune.

'Oh no, knock it off,' moaned Gavin the frog, who hated harmonicas. But Rufus was unaware of angry Gavin, and happily tooted away until Nancy came back half an hour later, waving from the back of Wiggy's Jeep. 'Goodness me, what a find!' said Wiggy, who was holding a large bundle of rope. He threw one end to Rufus, who tied it to the boat. Nancy tied the other end to the back of Wiggy's Jeep, and as the badger slowly moved the car forwards, the boat was dragged out of the stream and onto dry land. Rufus looked at the boat and beamed. 'I reckon with a bit of a clean up, this boat will be just the ticket!' he said. 'What do you reckon, sis? Fancy helping me out? Ted is going to love it.' 'Yeah, all right,' said Nancy, with a grin. 'It looks pretty cool.'

I went on a canal boating holiday with a circus troop. Once it took us five months to travel. two miles! Ridiculous. They were fleas, mind you, which made steering the boat quite tricky. Meanwhile, in Titus's caravan, Ted and Willow were tickling Sharon the Party Crow's armpits. 'Are you sure this is gonna work, Willow?' said Ted, gently pawing at Sharon. 'Course it is!' said Willow. 'EVERYONE laughs when you tickle their armpits. It's a scientific fact.' Titus was standing over them, holding a bottle of freshly made Crazyhorns Power Juice over Sharon's face.