10 Banana Bill

10. BANANA BILL "Would you like more?" asked Banana Bill as a monkey thrust a heavily laden plate toward Jim and Matilda. "Um, no thanks. I think I've had enough," said Jim with a burp. "Me too," said Matilda. "I feel kind of sick." Jim and Matilda were sitting on Banana Bill's veranda, outside his tree house. They could see Jim's dad and Nugget beneath them, playing tag with the monkeys.

"You escaped from the Pirate Cruncher," said Matilda. "Got any advice?" "Turn back!" said Banana Bill, wide-eyed. "We can't be turnin' back now," Jim said, sighing. "That beast has Grandpa's leg, and Grandpa won't rest until he gets it back! How did ye escape?"

"I was lucky," said Banana Bill. "If I were you, I'd turn back and get yer grandpa a new peg leg. But if ye really need t'know, it's all about the parrots! The monster don't like parrots!" "So how did that help you escape?" asked Jim. "I'd been livin' in his belly," said Bill, suddenly looking less cheery. "That place is full of pirates because he swallows 'em whole. Most 'ave been there for years, y'know, deep down in the dark, with the stomach acid bubblin' away beside 'em. I'd been there for one hundred days 'n' nights, and I had my trusty parrot, Gertrude, with me. She were the only parrot, though.

The rest of them swashbucklers had lost their birds. For some reason the Cruncher never ate the parrots, at least not if he could help it. I were hidin' Gertrude under this hat when he ate me, keepin' her safe from harm, or so I thought." "Never ate the parrots...?" muttered Matilda. "So one mornin', Gertrude weren't there when I woke. Her perch were empty, so I went lookin' for her. I could hear her squawkin', and up in his mouth she were. So I climbed up, clingin' to bits of driftwood that were stuck in his throat,

wadin' through dribble and seaweed. She were flyin' about, hollerin' and squawkin', and all in a flap. And then it 'appened. The Cruncher did this almighty sneeze." Banana Bill stroked Gertrude and gave a teary smile. "Allergic to scarlet macaws!" said Matilda. "Of course!"

"Aye, 'tis true, Matilda!" Bill continued. "When he sneezed, we were thrown in the sea, along with everythin' else that were in his gob. Lucky for me, there were a chunk of deck that landed with a splash beside us. I ain't never been a swimmer, so I grabbed 'old of it. Me 'n' Gertrude drifted for days until we were washed up 'ere. And I've been livin' with them monkeys ever since. It ain't a bad life, is it, Gertrude!" "So we need parrots! A lot of parrots!" said Matilda, with a huge smile. "This island is full of them!"