1. Extracurricular Activity Week

1 Extracurricular Activity Week My name is A.J., and I know what you're thinking. You're thinking about restrooms. I know because that's what I'm thinking about. Why do they call them restrooms? Nobody goes in there to rest. I don't go to the restroom because I'm tired. I go because I have to pee or poop. They don't

我的名字是a.j.，我知道你在想什么。 你在想洗手间。 我知道，因为我就是这么想的。 他们为什么叫卫生间？ 没人会去那里休息。 我不去洗手间是因为我累了。 我去是因为我要小便。 他们不

even have a bed or a comfy chair in there. If I want to take a rest, I'll stay home.

甚至有一张床或一把舒适的椅子。 如果我想休息，我会呆在家里。

My point is... it was Friday. I was in

我的观点是……那天是星期五。 我在

Miss Banks's class. She was talking about animals and how they digest food. Why do we have to learn that stuff? I'm never going to feed a moose. "Who can tell me what a carnivorous animal eats?" Miss Banks asked. Andrea Young, this annoying girl with curly brown hair, raised her hand. Of course. "Oooooh! Oooooh! I know!" oohed Andrea. She was waving her hand in the air like she was trying to signal a plane from a desert island. Andrea thinks she knows everything. She reads the dictionary for fun. What is her problem? I put my hand up just so Andrea wouldn't get to answer the question. Miss Banks called on me. "A.J., what does a carnivorous animal eat?" "Carnivorous animals eat cars," I replied. "That's why they're called car-nivorous."

班克斯小姐的课。她在谈论动物和它们如何消化食物。 我们为什么要学那些东西？ 我绝对不会喂驼鹿的。 “谁能告诉我食肉动物吃什么？”班克斯小姐问。 安德里亚·杨，这个令人讨厌的棕色卷发女孩，举起了手。 当然可以。“哇!哇!我知道！”安德烈叫道。 她在空中挥舞着她的手，就像她试图从一个荒岛上给飞机发信号一样。 安德里亚自以为无所不知。 她为了好玩而读字典。 她有什么问题？我举手是为了不让安德里亚回答问题。 班克斯小姐来拜访我。“ aj，食肉动物吃什么？”“肉食性动物吃汽车。”我回答。 “这就是为什么它们被称为汽车食性动物。”

Everybody laughed even though I didn't say anything funny. "That's wrong, Arlo!" said Andrea, who calls me by my real name because she knows I don't like it. "Carnivorous animals eat meat." "Very good, Andrea," said Miss Banks. "And who can tell me what herbivores eat?" "Oooooh! Oooooh!" oohed Andrea. "Herbivores eat guys named Herb," I shouted. "They do not!" said Andrea. "They eat plants!" "That's right," said Miss Banks. I know what carnivores and herbivores eat. I was just yanking Andrea's chain. But that's when the weirdest thing in the history of the world happened. You'll never believe who walked into the door at that moment. Nobody! Why would you walk into a door? You could get a concussion. But

大家都笑了，尽管我没说什么好笑的话。 “这是不对的，阿乐！”安德里亚说，她叫我的真名，因为她知道我不喜欢这样。 “食肉动物吃肉。” “很好，安德烈，”班克斯小姐说。 “谁能告诉我食草动物吃什么？”“哇!哦哦！”安德烈呜呜叫道。 “食草动物吃叫赫伯的家伙。”我喊道。 “他们没有！”安德烈说。 “它们吃植物！”“没错，”班克斯小姐说。 我知道食肉动物和食草动物吃什么。 我只是在拉安德里亚的链子 但就在那时，世界历史上最奇怪的事情发生了。 你绝对不会相信那一刻谁走进来了。 没有人!你为什么要撞门？ 你可能会脑震荡。 但