2. Anything Can Be Art

2 Anything Can Be Art Oh, sorry. I must have dozed off in the middle of Professor Armpit's fascinating talk about... whatever he was talking about. What a snoozefest. When I woke up, Professor Armpit was gone. At least I wouldn't have to listen to him talk anymore. But I was wrong.

一切都可能是艺术哦，对不起。 我一定是在腋窝教授精彩的演讲中睡着了…… 不管他在说什么。 真是个懒虫。当我醒来时，腋窝教授已经走了。 至少我不用再听他说话了。 但我错了。

The next morning, after we pledged the allegiance, Miss Banks announced, "Instead of math and social studies today, we're going on a field trip!" At first, I thought she was just pulling another one of her pranks, but she insisted she was serious. We were really going on a field trip. "Field trip!" yelled Alexia. "Field trip!" yelled Neil. "Field trip!" yelled Ryan. Everybody started yelling "field trip!" Field trips are cool. Well, except for field trips to a field. Those field trips are boring. "Where are we going?" asked Andrea, the Human Homework Machine. "We're taking a tour of a radioactive toxic waste dump," replied Miss Banks. WHAT?! "Just kidding," she said. "We're going to the Museum of Recent Art. Professor Pitt invited us to be his guests." "Yay!" shouted Andrea. "I love

第二天早上，在我们宣誓效忠后，班克斯小姐宣布：“今天我们不进行数学和社会学习，而是进行实地考察！”起初，我以为她只是在开另一个玩笑，但她坚持说她是认真的。 我们真的是要去实地考察。 “实地考察！” “实地考察！”尼尔喊道。 “实地考察！”瑞恩喊道。 每个人都开始大喊“实地考察！”实地考察很酷。 除了实地考察之外。 那些实地考察很无聊。 “我们要去哪儿？”人类作业机器安德里亚问。 “我们要去参观一个放射性的有毒废料倾倒场，”班克斯小姐回答。 什么? !“开个玩笑，”她说。 “我们要去近代艺术博物馆。 皮特教授邀请我们做他的客人。” “耶！”安德烈喊道。“我爱

museums!" Ugh, I hate museums. Museums are boring. I would rather have hot needles poked into my eyes than look at a bunch of dumb paintings. But Miss Banks said we had to go. We walked single file to the front door of the school, where the bus was waiting. "Bingle boo!" said our bus driver, Mrs. Kormel. Mrs. Kormel is not normal. She invented her own secret language. It's sort of like French. "Bingle boo" means "hello." "How come we never go on a field trip to a skateboard museum?" I complained to Ryan as we climbed on the bus. "Because there's no such thing as a skateboard museum," he replied. Well, there should be. "Museums are fun!" said Andrea, who sat across the aisle from me. "My mom has been taking me to museums for years." "For years?" I asked. "Don't they close

博物馆!”我讨厌博物馆。 博物馆很无聊。我宁愿让热针扎进我的眼睛也不愿看一堆愚蠢的画。 但班克斯小姐说我们必须去。 我们排成纵队走到学校的前门，公共汽车正在那里等着。 “嘣！”我们的巴士司机科尔梅尔夫人说。 科梅尔夫人不正常。 她发明了自己的秘密语言。 有点像法语。“Bingle boo”的意思是“你好”。 “我们怎么从来不去滑板博物馆实地考察呢？”当我们爬上公共汽车时，我向瑞恩抱怨。 “因为根本就没有什么滑板博物馆，”他回答说。 嗯，应该有。“博物馆很有趣！”坐在我过道对面的安德里亚说。 “我妈妈多年来一直带我去博物馆。” “多年来?”我问。“不要关门

museums at the end of each day?" Andrea just rolled her eyes. When we arrived at the Museum of Recent Art, we had to climb up a million hundred steps. What's up with that? Why do museums have so many steps in front of them? They should put museums at ground level, like normal buildings. Anyway, you'll never believe who was waiting for us at the top of the steps. It was Ms. Hannah! "I hope you kids are excited," she said as she led us inside the museum. "Within these walls are the greatest works of art of the last hundred years." "WOW," everybody said, which is "MOM" upside down.

每天下班后去博物馆吗？”安德里亚只是翻了个白眼。 当我们到达现代艺术博物馆时，我们不得不爬上一百万个台阶。 这是怎么回事？为什么博物馆前面有这么多台阶？ 他们应该把博物馆建在地面上，就像普通建筑一样。 不管怎样，你绝对不会相信谁在台阶顶上等着我们。 是汉娜女士！“我希望你们孩子们都很兴奋，”她带我们走进博物馆时说。 “在这些墙内是近一百年来最伟大的艺术作品。” “哇，”每个人都说，这是“妈妈”的颠倒。

Maybe going to the museum wouldn't be so bad. At least we didn't have to learn math or social studies. Ms. Hannah led us down a hallway until she found Professor Armpit's office. "Bonjour!" he said. "Welcome to the Museum of Recent Art. Before we get started on our tour, are there any questions?" "Can we go to the gift shop?" asked Michael. "Maybe later," said Professor Armpit. Gift shops are cool. They have all kinds

也许去博物馆也没那么糟。 至少我们不用学数学或社会学。 汉娜女士领着我们穿过走廊，找到了腋窝教授的办公室。 “你好！”他说。“欢迎来到现代艺术博物馆。 在我们开始参观之前，有什么问题吗？”“我们能去礼品店吗？”迈克尔问。 “也许以后再说。”腋窝教授说。 礼品店很酷。他们有各种各样的

of useful stuff, like refrigerator magnets and souvenir spoons with your name on them. If you ask me, I'd rather go to a museum gift shop than go to a museum. "Any other questions?" asked Professor Armpit. "Yeah," I said. "What's the capital of France?" "Uh, Paris," said Professor Armpit. "Why do you ask?" "I just want to make sure you're really French," I told him. "What's your favorite French food?" "French fries," he replied. "Well, okay," I said. "Maybe you really are French." "Come," Professor Armpit told us, "I want to show you some treasures of our collection." We followed him to a big room filled with all kinds of weird art. One painting was a bunch of black lines on a gray background. Another one was a bunch of

有用的东西，比如冰箱贴和印有你名字的纪念勺子。 如果你问我，我宁愿去博物馆礼品店也不愿去博物馆。 “还有问题吗？”腋窝教授问。 “是的，”我说。“法国的首都是哪里？”“嗯，巴黎。”腋窝教授说。 “你为什么这么问？”“我只是想确定你真的是法国人，”我告诉他。 “你最喜欢什么法国菜？”“炸薯条，”他回答。 “好吧，”我说。“也许你真的是法国人。” “来吧，”腋窝教授对我们说，“我想给你们看一些我们收藏的珍宝。” 我们跟着他来到一个大房间，里面摆满了各种奇怪的艺术品。 一幅画是灰色背景上的一堆黑线。 另一个是一堆