6 But Seriously

6 But Seriously We were in the vomitorium eating lunch. I had a sandwich. Michael had a sandwich. Alexia had a sandwich. Everybody had a sandwich except for Ryan. He had a wichsand. That's a sandwich with the meat on the outside. Ryan is weird. "So did Mrs. Stoker give you

我们在体育馆吃午饭。 我吃了一个三明治。迈克尔吃了一个三明治。 亚历克西娅吃了一个三明治。除了瑞恩，每个人都吃了三明治。 他有一个巫术。那是把肉放在外面的三明治。 瑞恩很奇怪。“斯托克太太也给了你

detention?" asked Neil. "No," Andrea and I replied. "Is she going to tell your parents you were talking during D.E.A.R. time?" asked Emily. "No," I said. "She just made us listen to a million hundred bad jokes." I looked up. Mrs. Stoker was talking to some fifth graders at the other end of the vomitorium. "Oh no," said Andrea. "Here she comes. She's going to tell more jokes." Mrs. Stoker was walking toward our table. "Hide your face," I said. "Maybe she won't notice us." We all looked at the ground. If you don't want a grown-up to talk to you, look at the ground. That's the first rule of being a kid. "It's too late," whispered Andrea.

留堂？”尼尔问。“不，”安德里亚和我回答。 “她会不会告诉你父母，你在d.e.a。 爱米丽问。“不，”我说。 “她让我们听了无数个坏笑话。” 我抬起头来。斯托克夫人正在礼堂的另一端和一些五年级学生谈话。 “哦，不，”安德烈说。“她来了。 她会讲更多的笑话。” 斯托克太太朝我们的桌子走过来。 “把脸遮起来，”我说。“也许她不会注意到我们。” 我们都看着地面。 如果你不想让大人跟你说话，那就看看地面。 这是当孩子的第一准则。 “太晚了，”安德烈低声说。

"She sees us." Mrs. Stoker stopped right in front of our table. "Hi boys and girls!" she said cheerfully. "Hey, did you ever notice that lunch ladies wear those funny hairnets? What's up with that?" "Hello, Mrs. Stoker," we all said.

“她看见我们了。”斯托克夫人正好停在我们的桌子前。 “嗨，孩子们！”她高兴地说。 “嘿，你有没有注意到吃午饭的女人戴着那些滑稽的发网？” 这是怎么回事？”“你好，斯托克太太，”我们都说。

"You know," she told us, "the clock in this lunchroom is slow. Yeah, it's always going back for seconds. Get it? Going back for seconds? Actually, I'm kind of mad at that clock. It really gets me ticked off." I tried my best to laugh at her jokes, but it wasn't easy. "But seriously," said Mrs. Stoker. "I opened my refrigerator door the other day and a carrot was blushing." "Don't ask why the carrot was blushing," I whispered under my breath. "Why was the carrot blushing?" asked Emily. "It saw the salad dressing!" said Mrs. Stoker. "Get it? Speaking of salad, did you hear about the lettuce that won a race? Yeah, it was a head the whole time." There was no stopping her. She just

“你知道，”她告诉我们，“这家餐厅的钟走得很慢。 是啊，它总是回到第二步。 明白了吗?再回去几秒钟？ 事实上，我有点讨厌那个钟。 这真的让我很生气。” 我尽我最大的努力去笑她的笑话，但这并不容易。 “可是说真的，”斯托克太太说。 “前几天我打开冰箱门，一根胡萝卜红了脸。” “别问胡萝卜为什么会脸红，”我低声说。 “胡萝卜为什么脸红了？”艾米丽问。 “它看见沙拉酱了！”斯托克太太说。 “明白了吗?说到沙拉，你听说过赢得比赛的莴苣吗？ 是的，一直都是头。” 没有什么能阻止她。 她只是

kept telling joke after joke. "My cookie had to go to the hospital," Mrs. Stoker told us. "Yeah, it felt crummy. And my baby strawberries are always crying. Well, their parents were in a jam. And my teddy bear never likes to eat dessert. He says he's stuffed. Hey, what did one plate say to the other plate? Dinner is on me! Get it?" Wow, Mrs. Stoker sure knows a lot of food jokes. I looked at Michael. Michael looked at Ryan. Ryan looked at Neil. Neil looked at Alexia. Alexia looked at me. We were all looking at each other. "Uh, I think it's time for us to go to recess," Alexia said. "Yeah," we all agreed, picking up our trays. "Is it recess already?" asked Mrs. Stoker. "Hey, why do they call it recess?

不停地讲笑话。 “我的饼干必须去医院，”斯托克太太告诉我们。 “是的，感觉很糟糕。我的小草莓总是在哭。 他们的父母陷入了困境。 我的泰迪熊从来不喜欢吃甜点。 他说他吃饱了。嘿，一个盘子对另一个盘子说了什么？ 晚餐我请！明白了吗?”哇，斯托克太太还真会讲很多关于食物的笑话。 我看着迈克尔。迈克尔看着瑞恩。 瑞安看着尼尔。尼尔看着亚历克西娅。 亚历克西娅看着我。我们都面面相觑。 “嗯，我想我们该休息了。”阿莱克西娅说。 “是的，”我们都同意，拿起我们的托盘。 “已经休息了吗？”斯托克太太问。 “嘿，他们为什么叫休会？”

Is that when you cess again? What's a cess? I say the best candy to eat after lunch is Recess Pieces. Get it?" We were going to clear off our plates and run out of there before she could tell any more jokes, but that's when the weirdest thing in the history of the world happened. Mrs. Jafee came into the vomitorium. She walked right up and stuck her face a few inches from Mrs. Stoker's face. She looked mad. "We need to talk," said Mrs. Jafee. "Is there a problem?" asked Mrs. Stoker. "Yeah," Mrs. Jafee replied. "When Mr. Klutz retired, I should have been named the new principal. You are totally unqualified. I have more experience than you. I'm smarter than you. And one more thing... I'm funnier than you."

那是你再一次成功的时候吗？ 什么是成功？我说午饭后吃的最好的糖果是课间糖果。 明白了吗?”我们本打算在她讲更多笑话之前把盘子收拾干净，然后离开那里，但就在这时，世界历史上最奇怪的事情发生了。 杰菲太太走进了礼堂。 她径直走过去，把脸贴在离斯托克太太脸几英寸的地方。 她看上去疯了。“我们需要谈谈，”杰菲太太说。 “有什么问题吗？”斯托克太太问。 “是的，”杰菲太太回答。 “当克鲁茨先生退休时，我应该被任命为新校长。 你完全不合格。 我比你有经验。 我比你聪明。还有一件事…… 我比你有趣。”