4 Bad Jokes and Dad Jokes

4 Bad Jokes and Dad Jokes We were told there was going to be another assembly so Mrs. Stoker could introduce herself to everyone from kindergarten to fifth grade. So we walked a million hundred miles to the all-porpoise room again. This time, I got to sit next to Ryan. Mrs. Stoker was up on the stage, waving to everybody as we

我们被告知又要举行一次集会，这样斯托克夫人就可以向从幼儿园到五年级的每个人做自我介绍了。 于是我们又走了一百多公里，回到了全海豚的房间。 这次，我得坐在瑞恩旁边。 斯托克夫人站在台上，向大家挥手致意

came in. "Hey," she said after all the classes were seated. "How is everybody feeling today? Anybody here from out of town?" "I live here," some first grader shouted. "Well, it's great to be here," said Mrs. Stoker. "Here is way better than there. I'm so excited to be your new principal. I was telling some of the kids out on the playground that I was bad student as a child. Really bad." "How bad were you?" somebody yelled.

走了进来。“嘿，”所有的课都落座后，她说。 “大家今天感觉怎么样？” 这里有外地人吗？”“我住在这里，”一个一年级的学生喊道。 “嗯，来这儿真好，”斯托克太太说。 “这里比那里好得多。 我很高兴能成为你们的新校长。 我告诉操场上的一些孩子，我小时候是个坏学生。 非常糟糕。”“你有多坏？”有人喊道。

"I was so bad," said Mrs. Stoker, "that on the first day of ninth grade I brought a ladder with me." "Why?" somebody yelled.

“我太坏了，”斯托克太太说，“九年级的第一天，我带了一个梯子。” “为什么？”有人喊道。

"Well, they told me it was high school," said Mrs. Stoker. "Get it? Ladder? High school?" A few kids laughed. "When I was a kid, I used to eat my homework for dessert," continued Mrs. Stoker. "Well, it wasn't my fault. My teacher said our homework was a piece of cake. Ha ha! In my school days, they made us take our tests in the jungle. You know why? Because there were too many cheetahs! Get it?" Mrs. Stoker doubled over laughing at her own jokes. I made sure to laugh even though they weren't that funny. You should always laugh at the principal's jokes, even if they're not funny. That's the first rule of being a kid. She went on... "There are so many different kinds

“嗯，他们告诉我这是高中，”斯托克太太说。 “明白了吗?梯子吗?高中?”几个孩子笑了。 “当我还是个孩子的时候，我常常把我的作业当甜点吃，”斯托克太太继续说。 “嗯，那不是我的错。 我的老师说我们的作业是小菜一碟。 哈哈!在我上学的时候，他们让我们在丛林里考试。 你知道为什么吗？因为那里有太多的猎豹！明白了吗?”斯托克太太被自己讲的笑话笑得直不起腰来。 我一定要笑，即使他们不是那么有趣。 你应该总是对校长讲的笑话发笑，即使它们并不好笑。 这是当孩子的第一准则。 她接着说……“有很多不同的种类

of schools, am I right? Surfers go to boarding school. People who sell ice cream go to sundae school." Boy, she sure knows a lot of jokes. "Do you know what a witch's favorite school subject is?" continued Mrs. Stoker. "Spelling! Get it? But seriously, did you ever notice that math books seem so sad? Well, they do have a lot of problems." And she went on... "Do you know what the king of all school supplies is?" "What?" we shouted. "The ruler!" said Mrs. Stoker. "Get it? Hey, what's the difference between a teacher and a train?" "What?" we all shouted. "A teacher tells you to spit out your gum, but a train goes 'Chew chew'!" Mrs. Stoker doubled over laughing

我说的对吗？冲浪者上寄宿学校。 卖冰淇淋的人上的是圣代学校。” 天啊，她可真会讲笑话。 “你知道女巫最喜欢的学校课程是什么吗？”斯托克太太接着说。 “拼写!明白了吗?但说真的，你有没有注意到数学书看起来很悲伤？ 嗯，他们确实有很多问题。” 她接着说……“你知道学校用品之王是什么吗？”“什么？”我们喊道。 “尺子！”斯托克太太说。 “明白了吗?嘿，老师和火车有什么区别？”“什么？”我们都喊道。 “老师让你把口香糖吐出来，但火车会叫‘嚼嚼’！”斯托克太太笑得弯下腰来

at her own joke again. "She is hilarious!" Ryan said to me. "She's going to be a great principal," I agreed. Everybody gave Mrs. Stoker a round of applause. "Well, that's my time, kids," she said. "I'll be here until June. You've been a wonderful audi—" Mrs. Stoker didn't have the chance to finish her sentence because our vice principal, Mrs. Jafee, stood up and raised her hand. "May I ask a question?" she said. "Certainly," said Mrs. Stoker. "Ask away." "What qualifies you to be a principal?" asked Mrs. Jafee.

又被她自己的笑话逗乐了。“她太搞笑了！”瑞安对我说。 “她会成为一名出色的校长，”我表示赞同。 大家都向斯托克夫人报以热烈的掌声。 “好吧，那是我的时间，孩子们，”她说。 “我要在这里待到六月。斯托克夫人还没来得及说完她的话，因为我们的副校长杰菲夫人站了起来，举起了手。 “我可以问一个问题吗？”她说。 “当然，”斯托克太太说。 “问了。”“你有什么资格当校长？”杰菲太太问。