8 Proof

8 Proof After Mr. O'Harrison left, it was time for us to go to science class. We walked a million hundred miles to the science lab. In the hallway, we saw Mrs. Patty with her snake basket again. "Would you like to touch Jake the Snake?" she asked us.

奥哈里森先生走后，我们该去上科学课了。 我们走了一百多英里到科学实验室。 在走廊里，我们又看到帕蒂太太拿着她的蛇篮子。 “你们想摸摸蛇杰克吗？”她问我们。

"We already did that!" Ryan reminded her. "He's my baby," said Mrs. Patty. Sheesh! Mrs. Patty should give it a rest with that snake already. Our science teacher is Mr. Docker. I mean, Mr. O'Docker. You'll never believe what weird thing he was doing when we walked into the science lab. I'm not going to tell you. Okay, okay, I'll tell you. He was peeling potatoes! I told you it was weird. Mr. O'Docker is off his o'rocker! He was sitting there with two big buckets in front of him. One was filled with the potatoes he'd already peeled, and the other one had the potatoes he hadn't peeled yet. "Mr. O'Docker," said Alexia. "Why are you peeling potatoes?" "I need them for my car," he replied. Oh, yeah. Mr. O'Docker has a car that doesn't use gas or electricity. It runs on potato power.* That's weird. After lunch, there must have been lots of extra potatoes in the vomitorium, so Mr. O'Docker was able to get some to use in his car.

“我们已经做到了！”瑞恩提醒她。 “他是我的孩子，”帕蒂太太说。 天哪!帕蒂太太已经该和那条蛇消停一会儿了。 我们的科学老师是多克先生。 我是说，奥多克先生。你绝对不会相信我们走进科学实验室时他在做什么奇怪的事。 我不会告诉你的。 好吧，好吧，我告诉你。 他在削土豆皮！我告诉过你这很奇怪。 奥多克先生疯了！他坐在那里，面前放着两个大水桶。 一个装满了他已经去皮的土豆，另一个装满了他还没有去皮的土豆。 “奥多克先生，”亚历克西娅说。 “你为什么要削土豆皮？”“我需要它们来装我的车，”他回答。 哦,是的。奥多克先生有一辆不使用汽油或电力的汽车。 它依靠土豆的能量运行。真奇怪。 午饭后，食堂里肯定有很多多余的土豆，所以奥多克先生能弄到一些放在他的车里。

"It's Saint Patrick's Day," he told us, "so let's talk about the science of the color green..." Oh no. We had to learn more stuff. "Green is a very interesting color," said Mr. O'Docker. "It's between blue and yellow on the visible spectrum and blah blah blah blah photosynthesis blah blah blah blah camouflage blah blah blah blah environment blah blah blah blah..." He went on like that for a million hundred hours talking about the color green. What a snoozefest! Mr. O'Docker knows a lot about science. I bet he could build an awesome leprechaun trap.

“今天是圣帕特里克节，”他告诉我们，“我们来谈谈绿色的科学原理吧……” 哦,不。我们必须学习更多的东西。 “绿色是一种非常有趣的颜色，”奥多克先生说。 “它在可见光谱上介于蓝色和黄色之间，光合作用，伪装，环境，等等等等。” 他就这样滔滔不绝地讲了无数个小时关于绿色的事。 真是个懒虫！奥多克先生很懂科学。 我打赌他能造一个很棒的小妖精陷阱。

"Did you ever build a leprechaun trap, Mr. O'Docker?" I asked. He shook his head and made a little frown. "I hate to be the one to tell you kids this," he replied, "but leprechauns don't exist in the real

“你做过小矮妖陷阱吗，奥多克先生？”我问。 他摇了摇头，微微皱了皱眉。 “我不想告诉你们这些孩子，”他回答说，“但是小矮妖在现实中是不存在的

world. They're just imaginary creatures, like fairies and elves." Wait. Fairies and elves aren't real? Who knew? Mr. O'Docker explained that scientists don't believe in things unless they have proof. He told us about something called the scientific method, which is how scientists prove what's true and what isn't. He went on for a million hundred hours explaining the scientific method. "Blah blah blah blah..." I had no idea what he was talking about. Finally, Mr. O'Docker stopped talking. "Any questions?" he asked. "Yes," I said, raising my hand. "Can I go to the bathroom?" "I don't know, A.J.," said Mr. O'Docker. "Can you go to the bathroom?" Oh, I keep forgetting. We're not supposed to say, "Can I go to the bathroom?" We're supposed to say, "May I go to the bathroom?" Nobody knows why. "May I go to the bathroom?" I asked. "Certainly, A.J."

世界。他们只是想象出来的生物，就像仙女和精灵一样。” 等待。仙女和精灵不是真的？ 谁知道呢?O'Docker先生解释说，除非有证据，否则科学家不会相信任何事情。 他告诉我们一种叫做科学方法的东西，这是科学家证明什么是对的，什么是错的。 他滔滔不绝地解释科学方法。 “废话，废话……”我不知道他在说什么。 最后，奥多克先生停止了说话。 “有问题吗？”他问。 “是的，”我说，举起了我的手。 “我能去洗手间吗？”“我不知道，a.j.，”奥多克先生说。 “你能去洗手间吗？”哦，我老是忘了。 我们不应该说，“我能去洗手间吗？”我们应该说“我能去洗手间吗”没人知道为什么。 “我可以去洗手间吗？”我问。 “当然,A.J.”

Mr. O'Docker said we could take a bathroom break before going back to class. Ryan and I went to the boys' bathroom, which is right across the hall from the science room. I went into one of the stalls. And you'll never believe what I found in there. If you guessed "a toilet," you're right! Of course there was a toilet in the stall. What else would you find in a bathroom stall? But it just so happens that there was something else in the stall. On the wall above the toilet, somebody had written words in green glitter... Tricky, tricky, you tried to be. Try again, you won't catch me!

奥多克先生说我们可以先上个厕所再回去上课。 瑞安和我去了男生洗手间，就在科学教室的对面。 我走进其中一个隔间。 你绝对不会相信我在里面发现了什么。 如果你猜的是“厕所”，你就对了！当然，隔间里有个厕所。 你还能在厕所隔间里找到什么？ 但碰巧在那个隔间里还有别的东西。 在厕所上方的墙上，有人用绿色闪光字写了几个字…… 狡猾，狡猾，你试着这么做。 再试一次，你抓不到我的！