4. A Piece of Cake

4 A Piece of Cake

The next morning, we were in Mr. Cooper's class. "Turn to page twenty-three in your math books," he said. That's when an announcement came over the loudspeaker. "Will the third grade please report to the all-porpoise room?" "Not again!" groaned Mr. Cooper. "Okay, everybody pringle up." We all lined up like Pringles and walked a million hundred miles to the all-porpoise room, which should really have a different name because there are no dolphins in there. Our principal, Mr. Klutz, was waiting for us. He has no hair at all. I mean none. He must save a lot of money on haircuts and shampoo. He told us all to climb up on the stage.

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"I'm so excited!" Mr. Klutz said. "It's time to choose which of you will represent Ella Mentry School in the Presidents' Day Challenge. Are you kids pumped?" "Yes!" shouted all the girls. "No!" shouted all the boys. "I'm going to ask you questions about the presidents," Mr. Klutz explained. "Blah blah blah blah. Whoever gets the most right will compete against Dirk School next week blah blah blah blah." Annoying Andrea was sitting in front of me. I heard her whisper to Emily. "I'm in the gifted and talented program," Andrea whispered. "This is going to be a piece of cake." What does cake have to do with anything? Andrea got the first question, of course. "Which president said 'it is easier to do a

job right than to explain why you didn't'?" asked Mr. Klutz. I had no idea. "The answer is Martin Van Buren," Andrea said. "He was the eighth president of the United States." "That's right!" said Mr. Klutz. "Very good, Andrea. I can see you've been studying." Andrea smiled the smile she smiles to let everybody know she knows something nobody else knows. What is her problem? "Okay, A.J., it's your turn," said Mr. Klutz. "This is a tough one. Who was president when the first flush toilet was installed in the White House?" I knew that! "Millard Fillmore!" I shouted. "That's right!" said Mr. Klutz. "Very good, A.J. I see you've been studying too."

I stuck my tongue out at Andrea. Next it was Ryan's turn. "Who was the third president of the United States?" asked Mr. Klutz. "John Adams?" guessed Ryan. "Incorrect," said Mr. Klutz. "Sorry, Ryan. Adams was the second president. The third president was Thomas Jefferson. Nice try, though." Ryan walked off the stage and took a seat in the front row. Next, it was Michael's turn. "Who was president when the Civil War started?" asked Mr. Klutz. "Andrew Jackson?" guessed Michael. "No, that's not it," said Mr. Klutz. "Sorry, Michael. The correct answer is Abraham Lincoln." Michael walked off the stage. It was Neil's turn.