2. Big Nose

2 Big Nose

2大鼻子

If I was the king of the world, I would change the calendar so it would go straight from January to March. That's right. No more February! But I'm not the king, so of course February came. We were minding our own business in Mr. Cooper's class. And you'll never believe who ran into the door at that moment. Nobody! Why would somebody run into a door? That would hurt. But you'll never believe who ran into the doorway. It was our principal, Mr. Klutz. "I have big news!" he announced. "Mr. Klutz has a big nose," I whispered to Michael, who never ties his shoes.

如果我是世界之王，我会改变日历，让它从一月直接到三月。 这是正确的。不再是二月了！但我不是国王，所以二月来了。 我们在库珀先生的课上只做自己的事。 你绝对不会相信是谁在那一刻冲了进来。 没有人!怎么会有人撞到门上？ 那会很痛苦。但你绝对不会相信是谁跑进了门口。 是我们的校长，克鲁茨先生。 “我有个大新闻！”他宣布。 “克鲁茨先生是个大鼻子，”我低声对迈克尔说，他从来不系鞋带。

"Next week, we're going to have a contest for all the third graders," said Mr. Klutz. "Oooooh!" everybody ooooohed, because contests are cool. "It's going to be Ella Mentry School against Dirk School," said Mr. Klutz. "Oooooh!" everybody ooooohed again. Dirk is another school in our town. We call it "Dork School." It's for really smart kids. Ella Mentry and Dirk are big rivals. We competed against them in the Brain Games last year, and we won. It was the greatest day of my life. "The contest is going to be on the Wednesday right after Presidents' Day," Mr. Klutz told us. "It's going to be called the 'Presidents' Day Challenge.' Doesn't that sound like fun?" "Yes!" shouted all the girls.

“下周，我们将为所有三年级学生举办一场比赛，”克鲁茨说。 “哦哦！”每个人都啧啧称奇，因为比赛很酷。 “这将是艾拉门特里学校对德克学校，”克鲁茨说。 “哦哦！”每个人又发出了“哦哦”的声音。 德克是我们镇上的另一所学校。 我们称之为“呆子学校”。这是为非常聪明的孩子准备的。 艾拉·门特里和德克是劲敌。 我们在去年的脑力游戏中与他们竞争，我们赢了。 那是我一生中最美好的一天。 “比赛将在总统日之后的周三举行，”克鲁茨告诉我们。 “这将被称为‘总统日挑战’。听起来是不是很有趣？”“是的！”所有的女孩都喊道。

"No!" shouted all the boys. The Presidents' Day Challenge sounded boring to me. It was sure to be one of those educational snoozefest contests where we have to learn stuff and pretend to be having fun. Learning stuff is no fun. If we have to learn stuff, why can't we learn about skateboarding or football? Why can't we have a skateboarding contest or a football game against Dirk School? That would be cool. "Booooooooo!" the guys and me started booing. "Wait a minute," said Mr. Klutz. "The wining school will get prizes." "Oooooh!" everybody ooooohed, because winning prizes is cool. And it would be great to beat those Dirk dorks again. "There will be four prizes," Mr. Klutz told us. "The first prize is bragging rights, of

“不！”所有的男孩喊道。 总统日挑战赛听起来很无聊。 这肯定是一场令人昏昏欲睡的教育竞赛，我们必须学习一些东西，并假装很开心。 学习并不有趣。如果我们必须学东西，为什么我们不能学滑板或足球？ 为什么我们不能和德克学校举行滑板比赛或足球赛呢？ 那太酷了。“呜——呜——呜！”我和其他人开始发出嘘声。 “等一下，”克鲁茨说。 “获胜的学校将获得奖励。” “哦哦！”每个人都发出了“哦哦”的声音，因为获奖很酷。 要是能再打败那些德克笨蛋就太好了。 “会有四个奖项，”克鲁茨先生告诉我们。 第一个奖品是吹牛的权利

course." Bragging rights? Who cares? Grown-ups always say you can win bragging rights. But then when we actually brag about something, the grown-ups tell us that bragging isn't nice and we should stop doing it. I'm not falling for that again. "Booooooooo!" "The second prize is a year's supply of Porky's Pork Sausages," said Mr. Klutz. I like Porky's Pork Sausages. But every time there's a contest, they give away Porky's Pork Sausages. I bet Mr. Klutz has a secret deal with Peter Porky, the guy who owns the Porky's Pork Sausage company. "Booooooooo!" "I think you'll like this," said Mr. Klutz. "The third prize is... a trip to DizzyLand." "Boo—" Wait. WHAT? Did he just say a trip to DizzyLand?

课程。”可炫耀的权利?谁在乎呢? 大人们总是说你可以赢得吹嘘的权利。 但是当我们真的在吹牛的时候，大人们告诉我们吹牛是不好的，我们应该停止这样做。 我不会再上当了。 “Booooooooo !”“二等奖是一年的猪肉香肠供应，”克鲁茨说。 我喜欢猪肉香肠。 但每次有比赛，他们都会送猪猪香肠。 我打赌克鲁茨先生和彼得·波奇有秘密交易，他是波奇猪肉香肠公司的老板。 “Booooooooo !”“我想你会喜欢的，”克鲁茨说。 “三等奖是……一次去眩晕乐园的旅行。” “嘘——”等。怎么啦？他刚才是说去眩晕乐园吗？