8 August

8 August July was pretty weird. But the weirdest thing in the history of the world happened on the first day of August. Mrs. Roopy wasn't in the media center when we got there. Instead, some guy was shelving books. He had giant red lips and was wearing white gloves, striped pants, a silly hat, a frizzy orange wig, and a red ball on his nose.

8月8日7月相当奇怪。 但是世界历史上最奇怪的事情发生在8月的第一天。 我们到的时候鲁比太太不在媒体中心。 相反，有人在书架上放书。 他有着大大的红唇，戴着白手套，穿着条纹裤，戴着一顶傻傻的帽子，戴着一顶卷曲的橙色假发，鼻子上还戴着一个红球。

"Hi, kids!" he shouted when he saw us. "Eeeeeeek!" Emily screamed. "Help!" shouted Ryan. "Run for your lives!" shouted Neil. Everybody was yelling and screaming and freaking out.

“嗨，孩子们！”他看到我们时喊道。 “Eeeeeeek !”艾米丽尖叫。 “救命！”瑞恩喊道。“逃命！”尼尔喊道。 每个人都在大喊大叫，吓坏了。

"It's just me!" the guy said as he peeled off his rubber face. It turned out to be Mrs. Roopy in disguise. "Why are you dressed like a clown, Mrs. Roopy?" asked Andrea. "Because the first week in August is International Clown Week!" she replied. "Let's not celebrate!" we all shouted. "What's the problem?" asked Mrs. Roopy. "On International Clown Week, we celebrate the efforts that clowns put in to make people laugh. Don't you like to laugh?" "No!" we all shouted. "Clowns are scary!" said Michael. "Why?" asked Mrs. Roopy. "They just are!" Emily whimpered as she cowered in the corner. "I think this is gonna give me nightmares," I said. "That's silly," Mrs. Roopy told us. "Relax. I'll make you some balloon animals." "No!" we all shouted. "We don't want balloon animals!" That's when our principal, Mrs. Stoker, came in. She was dressed like a clown too.

“是我！”那家伙一边说一边剥下他的橡胶脸。 原来是乔装的鲁比太太。 “你为什么穿得像个小丑，鲁比太太？”安德烈问。 “因为八月的第一周是国际小丑周！”她回答。 “我们不要庆祝了！” “有什么问题吗？”鲁比太太问。 “在国际小丑周，我们庆祝小丑为逗人笑所做的努力。 你不喜欢笑吗？”“不！”我们都喊道。 “小丑很可怕！”迈克尔说。 “为什么？”鲁比太太问。“他们就是这样！”爱米丽缩在角落里呜咽着。 “我想这会让我做噩梦的，”我说。 “那太愚蠢了，”鲁比太太告诉我们。 “放松。我给你做一些动物气球。” “不！”我们都喊道。“我们不要气球动物！”就在这时，我们的校长斯托克夫人进来了。 她也打扮得像个小丑。

"Hey," she said, "do you know why cannibals don't eat clowns?" "Why?" "Because they taste funny!" Nobody laughed at Mrs. Stoker's joke, even if she is the principal. The day got worse after that. We went to art, and Ms. Hannah was dressed like a clown. Then we went to science, and Mr. Docker was dressed like a clown. Then we went to music, and Uncle Fred was dressed like a clown. Then we went to fizz ed, and Miss Small was dressed like a clown. All the teachers were dressed like clowns! They were clomping around in big red shoes and chasing us while honking horns, riding unicycles, juggling, and doing other scary clown stuff. International Clown Week was horrible. I wanted to run away to Antarctica and go live with the penguins.*

“嘿，”她说，“你知道食人族为什么不吃小丑吗？”“为什么?”“因为它们尝起来怪怪的！”没有人嘲笑斯托克夫人的笑话，即使她是校长。 从那以后，天气变得更糟了。 我们去看艺术，汉娜小姐打扮得像个小丑。 然后我们去上科学课，多克先生穿得像个小丑。 然后我们去听音乐，弗雷德叔叔打扮得像个小丑。 然后我们去了fizz，斯莫尔小姐打扮得像个小丑。 所有的老师都打扮得像小丑一样！他们穿着红色的大鞋子蹦蹦跳跳地追着我们，一边按喇叭，骑独轮车，耍杂耍，做其他可怕的小丑动作。 国际小丑周太可怕了。 我想逃到南极洲去和企鹅一起生活

It was looking like August was going to be the worst month in the history of months. But then August 5 came. It was National Water Balloon Day and National Underwear Day. Yes, on the same day! So we got to go out on the playground and have a water balloon fight in our underwear. It

看起来8月将是历史上最糟糕的一个月。 但8月5日到来了。这是全国水气球日和全国内衣日。 是的，就在同一天！所以我们只能穿着内衣去操场打水球。 它

was so much fun that I almost forgot it was International Clown Week. Almost. I still think I'm gonna have nightmares.

太有趣了，我差点忘了这是国际小丑周。 几乎。我还是觉得我会做噩梦的。