3 Go Jump in a Lake

3 Go Jump in a Lake "It's time for swimming!" announced Uncle Ray. YAY! I love swimming. I can swim better than anybody. One time, I swam across the Pacific Ocean. Okay, I made that up. It looked like it was going to start raining, but we all put on our bathing suits and flip-flops. Then

“游泳的时间到了！”雷叔叔宣布。 耶!我喜欢游泳。我比任何人都游得好。 有一次，我游过太平洋。 好吧，我瞎编的。看起来要下雨了，但我们都穿上了泳衣和人字拖。 然后

we walked a million hundred miles through the woods. Uncle Ray let us stop off at the bathroom. I had even more mosquito bites than I thought. Those mosquitoes must love me. "Where's the pool?" I asked as we marched through the woods. "Pool?" Uncle Ray replied with a snort. "Do you think this is a country club? We swim in the lake." Lake? I never swam in a lake before. Lakes are for fishing. Lakes have mud and rocks and all kinds of gross stuff in them. Finally, we reached the lake. There was a long wooden dock going out into the water and a smaller dock floating in the middle. A lifeguard with big muscles came over to us. I knew he was the lifeguard because he had a whistle around his neck. Also, he was wearing a tank top that said LIFEGUARD on it. "Welcome to Lake Ahdoanwanna, Owls," he said. "I'm Uncle Craig. How many of you dudes already know how to swim?"

我们在树林里走了上百万英里。 雷叔叔让我们去趟洗手间。 我被蚊子叮咬的次数比我想象的还要多。 那些蚊子一定很喜欢我。 “游泳池在哪里？”我们穿过树林时，我问道。 “池?”雷叔叔哼了一声回答。 “你以为这是乡村俱乐部吗？” 我们在湖里游泳。”湖吗? 我从来没有在湖里游过泳。 湖泊是用来钓鱼的。湖泊里有泥土、岩石和各种恶心的东西。 最后，我们到达了湖边。 有一个长长的木船坞伸入水中，中间漂浮着一个小船坞。 一个肌肉发达的救生员向我们走来。 我知道他是救生员，因为他脖子上挂着一个哨子。 而且，他穿着一件写着“救生员”的背心。 “欢迎来到阿多旺纳湖，猫头鹰们，”他说。 “我是克雷格叔叔。你们当中有多少人已经会游泳了？”

Everybody raised a hand. Uncle Craig said we'd have to pass a deep-water test to prove we were good swimmers. We would have to swim out to the floating dock, tread water for sixty seconds, and then swim back. "It will be a piece of cake," said Uncle Craig. Huh? What did cake have to do with anything? Maybe he was going to give us cake if we passed the swimming test. It was starting to drizzle, but Uncle Craig didn't seem to care. He had us line up on the dock. There were lots of mosquitoes flitting around. Of course. At least when I'm underwater, I figured, the mosquitoes can't bite me. "We have to swim in the rain?" Michael asked. "What's the matter, dude?" asked Uncle Craig. "Are you afraid you'll get wet? Ha-ha-ha!"

每个人都举手了。克雷格叔叔说我们必须通过深水测试来证明我们是游泳好手。 我们必须游到浮船坞，踩水60秒，然后再游回来。 “这将是一块蛋糕，”克雷格叔叔说。 嗯?蛋糕跟这事有什么关系？ 如果我们通过了游泳考试，也许他会给我们蛋糕。 天开始下毛毛雨了，但克雷格叔叔似乎并不在意。 他让我们在码头排队。 有许多蚊子飞来飞去。 当然可以。至少当我在水下的时候，我想蚊子不会咬我。 “我们要在雨中游泳？”迈克尔问道。 “怎么了，伙计？”克雷格叔叔问。 “你怕淋湿吗？” 哈哈哈!”

He laughed like that was the funniest joke in the history of jokes. "All right!" he continued. "Let's go. Ready, Owls?" "HOOT, HOOT, HOOT! WE DON'T GIVE A HOOT!" we all yelled. Uncle Craig blew his whistle. Ryan jumped in the water, swam out to the dock, treaded water for sixty seconds, and swam back. "Good job, dude!" hollered Uncle Craig. He blew his whistle. Michael jumped in, swam out to the dock, treaded water for sixty seconds, and swam back. "Nice form, dude!" hollered Uncle Craig, who definitely says the word "dude" too much. He blew his whistle again. Neil jumped in, swam out to the dock, treaded water for sixty seconds, and swam back. "Beautiful, dude!" hollered Uncle Craig. He blew his whistle again. It was my turn. I jumped in and started swimming. I swam out to the dock and started treading water. I counted ten seconds in my head. Twenty seconds. Thirty seconds.

他笑得好像那是笑话史上最好笑的笑话。 “好吧！”他接着说。 “我们走吧。准备好了,猫头鹰?”“呜，呜，呜！”我们才不管呢！”我们都喊道。 克雷格叔叔吹口哨。 瑞安跳进水里，游到码头，踩水60秒，然后游回来。 “干得好，伙计！”克雷格叔叔喊道。 他吹口哨。迈克尔跳进水里，游向码头，在水面上踩了60秒，然后又游了回来。 “身材不错，伙计！”克雷格叔叔喊道，他说“伙计”这个词说得太多了。 他又吹了一次口哨。 尼尔跳进水里，游到码头，踩水60秒，然后游回来。 “真漂亮，伙计！”克雷格叔叔喊道。 他又吹了一次口哨。 轮到我了。我跳进水里开始游泳。 我游到码头，开始踩水。 我在脑子里数了十秒钟。 二十秒。三十秒。

Man, lake water is dirty! It's probably filled with plankton and bacteria and algae and other slimy stuff. Forty seconds. I felt something touch my foot while I was treading water. Was that a fish? Fifty seconds. A fish was nibbling at my toes! Or maybe it was a whole school of fish! Gross! I don't mind eating fish, but I don't want them eating me. Sixty seconds. Time to start swimming back to the dock. While I was trying to get my feet away from the fish, my mouth slipped under for a moment and I swallowed a little water. Ugh. Dirty, disgusting lake water! That's when I realized something. Fish pee in lakes! I swallowed fish pee! I was freaking out. Glub, glub. I don't know what happened after that. I don't know how much time had passed. All I knew was that I was lying on my back on the dock and

伙计，湖水真脏！它可能充满了浮游生物、细菌、藻类和其他粘稠的东西。 四十秒。我在踩水时感到有什么东西碰了我的脚。 那是一条鱼吗？50秒。 一条鱼在啃我的脚趾！也可能是一群鱼！恶心!我不介意吃鱼，但我不想让它们吃掉我。 六十秒。是时候游回码头了。 当我试图把脚从鱼身上挪开的时候，我的嘴在下面滑了一会儿，吞了一点水。 啊。又脏又恶心的湖水！这时我意识到一件事。 鱼在湖里撒尿！我吞了鱼尿！我吓坏了。 Glub Glub。我不知道之后发生了什么。 我不知道过了多久。 我只知道我仰面躺在码头上

somebody was blowing air into my mouth. I opened my eyes. And you'll never believe in a million hundred years who was giving me mouth-to-mouth resuscitation. I'm not going to tell you. Okay, okay, I'll tell you. It was Andrea Young, this girl in my class at school with curly brown hair!* Noooooooooooo! "Ooooh," said Ryan. "A.J. and Andrea are kissing! They must be in love!" "When are you gonna get married?" asked Michael. I jumped up. Andrea was wearing pink sunglasses and a bathing suit with butterflies on it. A few other girls were behind her.

有人在往我嘴里吹气。 我睁开眼睛。你永远也不会相信是谁给我做了人工呼吸。 我不会告诉你的。 好吧，好吧，我告诉你。 是安德里亚·杨，我们班那个棕色卷发的女生！* Noooooooooooo !“哦，”瑞恩说。 “A.J.和安德里亚在接吻！”他们一定是相爱了！”“你打算什么时候结婚？”迈克尔问。 我跳了起来。安德里亚戴着粉红色的太阳镜，穿着有蝴蝶图案的泳衣。 其他几个女孩在她后面。