10. The Expanding Universe

10 The Expanding Universe Andrea rang the doorbell, and sure enough Mrs. Yonkers popped her head out of the screen door. Well, she didn't really pop her head out of the screen door. If you popped your head out of a screen door, it would hurt. Also, you wouldn't have a head anymore. "Oob!" we all shouted. "Treat or trick!" "Well, howdy, y'all!" Mrs. Yonkers said. "Yee-ha! I've been waiting for you varmints to show up." She's from Texas. People from Texas say "y'all," "yee-ha," and "varmints" all the time on TV. Nobody knows why. Mrs. Yonkers is the computer teacher at our school. She's a genius, and she's always inventing stuff. Like one time she invented a

安德烈按响了门铃，果然，扬克斯太太从纱门里探出了头。 她并没有真的把头伸出纱门。 如果你把头伸出纱门，会很疼的。 而且，你也没有头了。 “噢！”我们都叫了起来。“不给糖就捣蛋！”“大家好！”扬克斯太太说。 “Yee-ha !我一直在等着你们这些恶棍出现。” 她来自德克萨斯州。德州人总是在电视上说“你们” “耶哈”和“恶棍” 没人知道为什么。扬克斯夫人是我们学校的计算机老师。 她是个天才，总是在发明新东西。 比如有一次她发明了一个

giant hamster wheel that generated electricity. Another time she invented a boat that traveled through time. She even started her own computer company called NERD: New Electronic Research Development.

能发电的巨型仓鼠轮。 还有一次，她发明了一艘穿越时空的船。 她甚至创办了自己的电脑公司NERD：新电子研究发展。

Mrs. Yonkers was wearing one of those big yellow fake-cheese hats. It wasn't her Halloween costume. She wears that thing all the time. Nobody knows why. She let each of us take two candy bars from her bowl. "Andrea said you have a magical Halloween surprise treat that we can't get anywhere else," I said. "I do!" Mrs. Yonkers told us. "Do y'all want to see it?" "Yee-ha!" we all shouted. Everybody was excited as Mrs. Yonkers led us into her kitchen. She told us she had created a top secret invention that nobody knew about yet. Then she waved her hand dramatically and pointed to the microwave oven. "Ta-da!" she said. "Here it is!" We all looked at it. "Uh, that's just a microwave oven," Ryan

扬克斯太太戴着一顶黄色的假奶酪大帽子。 那不是她的万圣节服装。 她一直戴着那个。 没人知道为什么。她让我们每人从她的碗里拿两块糖果。 “安德里亚说你们有一种神奇的万圣节惊喜，我们在其他任何地方都买不到，”我说。 “我做的!”扬克斯太太告诉我们的。 “你们都想看吗？”“耶——哈！”我们都喊道。 扬克斯太太把我们领进厨房时，每个人都很兴奋。 她告诉我们她发明了一项无人知晓的绝密发明。 然后她戏剧性地挥挥手，指着微波炉。 “哒哒！”她说。“在这儿！”我们都看着它。 “呃，那只是个微波炉，”瑞恩说

said. "Oh, it looks just like a microwave oven," Mrs. Yonkers told us. "But actually, it's the revolutionary new MicroMole 4000 Expandinator." We all looked at it some more. It sure looked like a microwave oven to me. "What does it do?" asked Neil the nude kid. "Let me see if I can explain," Mrs. Yonkers told us. "For thousands of years, scientists have wondered where the universe ends. Does it have an edge somewhere, or does it just go on forever and ever?" "What does that have to do with your machine?" Billy asked. "You'll see," Mrs. Yonkers replied. "In 1929, an astronomer named Edwin Hubble proved that the universe is expanding all the time.* With the MicroMole 4000

说。“哦，它看起来就像一个微波炉，”扬克斯太太告诉我们。 “但实际上，它是革命性的新型MicroMole 4000膨胀器。” 我们又看了一会儿。 在我看来，它确实像个微波炉。 “它有什么用？”裸体小孩尼尔问。 “让我看看能不能解释清楚，”扬克斯太太对我们说。 “几千年来，科学家们一直想知道宇宙的尽头在哪里。 它会在某个地方有一个边缘，还是会永远持续下去？”“这和你的机器有什么关系？”比利问道。 “你等着瞧吧，”扬克斯太太回答。 1929年，一位名叫埃德温·哈勃的天文学家证明了宇宙一直在膨胀。*使用MicroMole 4000

Expandinator, I figured out how to accelerate the rate of expansion by altering the molecular structure and blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah..." Mrs. Yonkers went on like that for a while. It didn't seem like the universe was expanding to me, but it sounded like a cool idea. If the universe was expanding, maybe there would be more video games and skate parks. Finally, Mrs. Yonkers finished talking about the universe expanding. "So what does the MicroMole 4000 Expandinator actually do?" asked Andrea. "Oh, that's simple," Mrs. Yonkers told us. "It makes stuff bigger." WHAT?!!! "You mean to say that if you put

膨胀器，我发现了如何通过改变分子结构来加速膨胀的速度，等等，等等，等等，等等，等等 扬克斯太太这样说了一会儿。 我不觉得宇宙在膨胀，但这听起来是个很酷的想法。 如果宇宙在膨胀，也许会有更多的电子游戏和滑板公园。 最后，扬克斯夫人结束了对宇宙膨胀的讨论。 “那么MicroMole 4000膨胀器到底是做什么的呢？”Andrea问。 “哦，这很简单，”扬克斯太太告诉我们。 “它让东西变大了。”什么? ! !“你是说如果你把

something in that machine and turn it on, it makes the thing bigger?" asked Ryan. "That's right," said Mrs. Yonkers. "See for yourself." She picked up a pot holder from the kitchen counter and put it inside the MicroMole 4000 Expandinator. Then she pushed a button. The machine turned on and made a noise just like a microwave oven. About ten seconds later, there was a little ding sound. Mrs. Yonkers opened up the MicroMole 4000 Expandinator. And you'll never believe in a million hundred years what was inside. A GIANT POT HOLDER! "WOW," we all shouted, which is "MOM" upside down. "That's amazing!" Andrea said. "It's like the universe expanded in the machine!" She was right. That is, if the universe was

然后把它打开，它就会变大？”瑞恩问。 “没错，”扬克斯太太说。 “你自己看吧。”她从厨房柜台上拿起一个锅架，把它放在MicroMole 4000膨胀器里。 然后她按了一个按钮。机器启动后发出了像微波炉一样的声音。 大约十秒钟后，传来了轻微的叮叮声。 扬克斯太太打开了微型鼹鼠4000膨胀器。 再过一百万年你也不会相信里面是什么。 一个巨大的锅架！“哇！”我们都喊道，这是“妈妈”的颠倒。 “这太神奇了!”安德里亚说。 “就像宇宙在机器里膨胀一样！”她是对的。 也就是说，如果宇宙存在的话