8 Crazy-Everything Day

Chapter 8 Crazy-Everything Day Friday was Crazy-Everything Day. I wore a bucket on my head and bounced to school on a pogo stick. Ryan wrapped himself in toilet paper. Michael attached bike horns all over his clothes and beeped them when he moved. Neil wore flip-flops and a hockey mask, and he carried a flyswatter in one hand and a banana in the other. This had to be the craziest day in the history of the world! Mr. Granite spent the whole morning trying to teach us stuff, but it was useless. Nobody could pay attention. Finally it was lunchtime and we got to go to the vomitorium. The guys and me sat at one table, and

Andrea and her girly friends sat at the next one. We tried making armpit farts to get rid of them, but they wouldn't leave. Michael was eating a Lunchable. Ryan

had soup in a thermos. I was eating a jelly and peanut butter sandwich. I used to eat peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, but my mom said I couldn't have the same lunch every single day, so I told her to make me a jelly and peanut butter sandwich instead.* "I wonder what Mrs. Lizzy is gonna teach us today," Michael said. "Something weird, that's for sure," said Ryan. "That lady has way too much time on her hands," said Neil the nude kid. "Maybe Mrs. Lizzy isn't our recess enrichment teacher at all," I told the guys. "Did you ever think of that?" "What do you mean, A.J.?" asked Michael. "Well, maybe she kidnapped our real recess enrichment teacher and has her tied up in a secret room in the basement of the

school. Stuff like that happens all the time, you know." "You say that about everybody, Arlo," said Andrea at the next table. "I do not." "Do too." We went back and forth like that for a while. But nobody wanted to hang around the vomitorium. We rushed through our lunch so we could see Mrs. Lizzy on the playground. She looked crazier than ever! She had a spaghetti strainer on her head and a Ping-Pong paddle hanging from her neck, and she was carrying a big box.

"Hi Mrs. Lizzy!" we all yelled. "What's in the box?" "Worms!" Mrs. Lizzy exclaimed as she opened the box to show us. "Worms?!" we all yelled.

"Ew, disgusting!" said Emily. "Are we going fishing today?" asked Andrea. "No, we're going worm composting!" Mrs. Lizzy said. Even Andrea didn't know what that meant. But Mrs. Lizzy told us that you can use worms to turn food scraps into this stuff called compost that can be added to soil to grow plants, flowers, fruits, and vegetables. "The worms eat your leftovers and turn it into worm poop," Mrs. Lizzy explained. "It helps things grow." "Ew, disgusting!" we all said. "We're supposed to put worm poop on our vegetables and then eat them?" Ryan asked. Ryan will eat anything. One time he ate a piece of the cushion on the school bus. But I don't think he would eat something that was grown in worm poop.