6 English Is Weird

Chapter 6 English Is Weird "Okay, everyone, back on your bikes," Mr. Granite said. "It's time for language arts." Ugh! I hate language arts. Language is boring. Art is boring. So there's nothing more boring than language arts. Except maybe math. Math is really boring. "There are some things I don't understand about the English language," Mr. Granite told us. "Like what?" asked Andrea. Little Miss Know-It-All keeps a dictionary on her desk so she can show everybody how smart she is. "Why is it that noses run and feet smell?" Mr. Granite replied. "Shouldn't it be the

“好了，各位，回到你的自行车上，”格拉尼特先生说。 “是时候学习语言艺术了。” 啊!我讨厌语言艺术。 语言是无聊的。艺术很无聊。 所以没有什么比语言艺术更无聊的了。 除了数学。数学真的很无聊。 格拉尼特先生告诉我们：“英语有些地方我不懂。” “比如什么？”安德烈问。 万事通小姐在她的桌子上放着一本字典，这样她就可以向大家展示她有多聪明。 “为什么鼻子会流鼻涕，脚会有臭味？”格拉尼特先生回答。 “不应该是

other way around?" "What do you mean?" asked Emily. "Well, it seems to me that feet should run and noses should smell," Mr. Granite said. "So why do people say noses run and feet smell?" "It's just an expression," said Michael. "It makes no sense," said Ryan. "My feet don't smell," I said. "They do too, A.J.," said Neil the nude kid. "When you had that sleepover at your house, I had to sleep with your feet in my face." "A nose would run if it had legs," Michael said. "Feet could smell if they had a nose," said Ryan. "Yeah, if you had a nose attached to your foot, your foot could smell," I pointed out.

反过来？”“你是什么意思？”爱米丽问。 “嗯，在我看来，脚应该流鼻涕，鼻子应该闻味道，”格拉尼特说。 “那为什么人们说鼻子流鼻涕，脚有气味呢？”“这只是一种表达，”迈克尔说。 “这毫无意义，”瑞恩说。 “我的脚没有味道，”我说。 “他们也是，a.j.，”裸体小孩尼尔说。 “当你在你家过夜时，我不得不睡在你的脚上。” “鼻子有腿就会流鼻涕，”迈克尔说。 “如果脚有鼻子，它们就能闻到味道，”瑞恩说。 “是的，如果你的脚上长了一个鼻子，你的脚就能闻到味道了。”我指出。

"Arlo, you're just trying to get out of doing math next period," said Andrea. "I am not." "Are too." We went back and forth like that for a while until Mr. Granite told us to knock it off. "Why are there no eggs in an eggplant?" he asked the class. "And why is there no ham in a hamburger? Hot dogs aren't made from dogs. And a pineapple doesn't have apples in it. Or pine, for that matter."

“阿乐，你只是想逃避下一节课的数学，”安德里亚说。 “我不是。”“太”。我们就这样来回折腾了一会儿，直到格拉尼特先生叫我们别闹了。 “为什么茄子里没有鸡蛋？”他问全班同学。 “为什么汉堡里没有火腿？” 热狗不是用狗做的。 菠萝里面没有苹果。 或者说松树。”

"Mr. Granite is right!" said Ryan. "English is weird," I said. "Why are boxing rings square?" asked Mr. Granite. "If they're rings, they should be round." "Yeah!" some of the kids agreed. "If one tooth and another tooth are called teeth," said Mr. Granite, "and one goose and another goose are called geese,

“花岗岩先生是对的！”瑞恩说。 “英语很奇怪，”我说。 “为什么拳击台是方形的？”格拉尼特先生问。 “如果是戒指，就应该是圆的。” “是啊！”一些孩子表示同意。 “如果一颗牙齿和另一颗牙齿被称为牙齿，”格拉尼特先生说，“一只鹅和另一只鹅被称为鹅，

then why aren't one moose and another moose called meese?" "Yeah!" Neil said. "What's up with that?" "Why do we play at a recital and recite at a play?" asked Mr. Granite. "When a house burns up, how can it also burn down? And why do we drive on the parkway and park on the driveway?" "Yeah!" everybody shouted. "Mr. Granite is right!" I said. "The English language is messed up. If you ask me, we should complain." "Who are you going to complain to, Arlo?" asked Andrea. "The president!" I said. "We should write a letter to the president of the United States!" Andrea rolled her eyes, but Mr. Granite said that writing a friendly letter to the

那为什么一头驼鹿和另一头驼鹿不叫meese呢？”“是啊!”尼尔说。 “这是怎么回事？”“为什么我们在朗诵会上演奏，在戏剧上背诵？”格拉尼特先生问道。 “房子烧了，怎么可能也烧了呢？” 为什么我们要在公园路上开车，又把车停在车道上？”“耶！”每个人都喊道。 “格拉尼特先生说得对！”我说。 “英语很混乱。 要我说，我们应该抱怨。” “你要向谁抱怨呢，阿乐？”安德烈问。 “总统!”我说。“我们应该给美国总统写封信！”安德里亚翻了个白眼，但格拉尼特先生说写一封友好的信给

president was a great idea. So nah-nah-nah boo-boo on Andrea. Mr. Granite passed out paper to everybody. It's hard to write while you're riding a bike. So I kept my letter short and sweet: Dear Mr. President, I am a third-grade student at Ella Mentry School. I don't think it's fair that your feet smell. Do you have a nose attached to your foot? Sincerely, A. J.

当总统是个好主意。 所以安德里亚的糗事。 格拉尼特先生给大家发了纸。 骑自行车的时候很难写字。 所以我把信写得简短而甜蜜：亲爱的总统先生：我是艾拉门特里学校的一名三年级学生。 我觉得你脚上有味道不公平。 你的脚上有鼻子吗？ 真诚的，a.j.。