5 Goo-Goo Gah-Gah

Chapter 5 Goo-Goo Gah-Gah We were just about to get on our exercise bikes the next morning when the school secretary, Mrs. Patty, made an announcement over the intercom. "Teachers, please do not throw your teacups around the teachers' lounge. Thank you." That was weird. "Okay, P.A.L.s," said Mr. Granite, "it's time for language arts. So start pedaling!" We all started pedaling. But we didn't learn anything about language arts. Because you'll never believe in a million hundred years who walked into the door at that very moment! Nobody! Because if you walked into a

door, it would hurt. But you'll never believe who walked into the doorway. It was our old teacher, Mrs. Daisy! She was with her husband, Mr. Macky, who is our reading teacher. We hadn't seen Mrs. Daisy since we graduated from second grade in June. "Mrs. Daisy!" we all shouted. "Mrs. Daisy," said Mr. Granite, "to what

do we owe the pleasure of your company?" That's grown-up talk for "What are you doing here?" "I missed my kids," she replied. "We missed you too!" said Andrea, the big brownnoser. Mrs. Daisy was holding something in her arms, but we couldn't see what it was because it was wrapped up in a pink blanket. "Did you bring us a present?" I asked. "Not exactly…," said Mr. Macky. "It's a baby, dumbhead!" shouted Andrea. "Mrs. Daisy had her baby!" All the girls rushed over to look, as if having a baby is a big deal. "What's her name?" Andrea asked. "Jackie," said Mrs. Daisy. "Jackie Macky." "What a lovely name!" Emily said. "She's

beautiful!" "She's adorable!" Andrea said. "She stinks," I said, holding my nose. "I think Jackie just pooped," said Mr. Macky. "We'll change her diaper in a minute." I wasn't gonna go near that thing, especially after it pooped. But all the girls were coochie-coochie-cooing and saying "Goo-goo gah-gah" to Jackie Macky. All babies say "Goo-goo gah-gah." Nobody knows why. It must be the first rule of being a baby. "I think Jackie looks just like you, Mrs. Daisy!" said Emily. "No," said Andrea. "I think Jackie looks just like you, Mr. Macky." "I think she looks just like Mr. Klutz," I said. "She's as bald as a balloon." "Arlo, that's mean!" said Andrea.

Well, it was true! All babies look alike anyway. Jackie Macky started drooling, and then she started blowing spit bubbles. Then she put her foot in her mouth and started sucking on her toes. I thought it was pretty disgusting, but the girls thought it was cute. I know that if I started drooling in school, blowing spit bubbles, and sucking on my toes, nobody would think it was cute. I would probably get kicked out of school. "WAAAA!" Jackie Macky cried. "WAAAA!" "I think she bit her own foot," I said. "Jackie might be pooping some more," said Mrs. Daisy. "We'd better go now." Babies are weird.