4 Mr. Sunny Is Weird

Chapter 4 Mr. Sunny Is Weird Mr. Sunny had a baseball cap on his head and earphones in his ears. He was working very hard on his sand castle, using a plastic shovel to carve the walls. Finally, he noticed me and Andrea watching him. "Hi, A.J.!" he said. "Who's your girlfriend?" "She's not my girlfriend," I said. "I'm not his girlfriend," Andrea said. "Well, who's your friend that's a girl?" asked Mr. Sunny. "She's not my friend, either," I told him. "Friends are people you like. This is Andrea." "Charmed," Andrea said, all giggly. She did one of those courtesy things girls do. "I love your sand castle!"

What a brownnoser! As soon as Andrea started talking to Mr. Sunny, she acted like I wasn't even there. "I'm gonna win the contest," Mr. Sunny said. "First prize is a trip to France. I'm gonna go to college there and study sand sculpture from the great sand masters." "That sounds awesome," Andrea gushed. "Are you in high school?" "Yeah, I'm sixteen." "Is Sunny your real name?" asked Andrea. "Nah," Mr. Sunny said. "My name is Evan. Everybody calls me Mr. Sunny because I love the sun so much." "'What's in a name?'" said Andrea. "'That which we call a rose by any other name would smell as sweet.' Shakespeare wrote that, you know." Ugh.

Mr. Sunny took off his baseball cap and showed it to us. It had solar panels built right into it! Then he turned around and showed us that his tank top had solar panels built into it too. "The solar panels power my iPod," Mr. Sunny told us. "Why do we have to burn gas or coal when all the power we need is right there in the sky? Global warming is a bummer, man." "I hate global warming," Little Miss Brownnoser said. If Mr. Sunny said he hated butterflies, Andrea would probably say she hates them too. "Excuse me," Mr. Sunny said. "I can't talk right now. I have to work on my sand castle before the beach fills with kids." "'Men of few words are the best men,'" Andrea said. "Shakespeare wrote that too." Mr. Sunny took off his shirt and went

back to carving the castle. When he turned around, I could see the word "SUNNY" written across his back in white letters. "Is that a tattoo?" I asked. "No," Mr. Sunny said. "I cut the letters SU-N-N-Y out of paper and taped them to my back. It's a SUNNY sunburn!" Andrea was all giggly and told him his sunburn was cool. "I bet you have lots of girlfriends," Andrea said. "Oh, I don't have time for that," Mr. Sunny replied. "Sand is my life." Mr. Sunny is funny! But if you ask me, people who wear solar panels and tape letters to their backs are weird. Soon the beach was filled with people, blankets, and umbrellas. I went for a swim. When I came back, Andrea and a bunch of other kids were gathered around Mr. Sunny.

"Part of being a lifeguard is to teach you kids about first aid," he said. "Does anybody know what to do if a person is drowning and can't breathe?" Little Miss I-Know-Everything waved her hand in the air, just like she was at school. But Mr. Sunny called on me. So nah-nahnah boo-boo on Andrea. "It depends on who's drowning," I said. "If the quarterback of your Pee Wee football team is drowning, then you have to get a new quarterback right away. Because if you don't have a quarterback, you'll have to forfeit the game." Everybody laughed even though I didn't say anything funny. Andrea rolled her eyes. "How about you, Andrea?" asked Mr. Sunny. "If somebody is drowning," she said, "you give them mouth-to-mouth

resuscitation." "That's right!" Mr. Sunny said. Andrea stuck her tongue out at me. I stuck mine out right back at her. "Arlo, don't you remember when Officer Spence gave mouth-to-mouth resuscitation to Mrs. Daisy at our graduation?" Andrea asked. "It was just last week!" How am I supposed to remember what happened last week? "Do you need a volunteer to practice mouth-to-mouth resuscitation on?" asked one of the girls. They all got giggly and waved their hands in the air. "Me! Me! Me!" shouted Andrea. "Please please please please pick me!" "Okay," Mr. Sunny said. "Andrea, you're my volunteer." "Yay!" Andrea squealed, jumping up and down. I tell you, that "please" thing works