12 A Bathroom Emergency

Chapter 12 A Bathroom Emergency After it was all over, Fish Food and Zack and Miss Mary got into their tour bus. It said JUST MARRIED on it. Somebody had tied a bunch of cans and stuff to the back bumper. What's up with that? Then they all waved good-bye and drove away. Mr. Klutz had tears in his eyes. Everybody else was really happy. Especially Mr. Granite. That's when I realized something. I had to go to the bathroom really badly! I was going to wait until I got home, but it was an emergency. I went into the school and ran down the hall to the boys' bathroom. "Is anybody in here?" I asked as I pushed open the door, just to be on the safe side. I wasn't taking any chances, ever since the

last time. There was nobody in the bathroom. I went into one of the stalls. I did what I had to do and flushed the toilet. But that's when the weirdest thing in the history of the world happened. The toilet next to mine flushed! I figured they must be testing out the new automatic toilets again. I looked under the wall into the stall next to mine. And you'll never believe in a million hundred years what I saw in there. It was a ghost! A ghost was sitting on the toilet! I was freaking out! "Who… are… you?" I asked. "Who do I look like?" the ghost said. "I'm a ghost." "You're a real ghost?" "Of course I'm a real ghost," the ghost

said. "I didn't know ghosts use the bathroom," I said. "Now you know," said the ghost. "Do you eat kids for lunch?" I asked. "No." "Good." "We eat kids for dinner," said the ghost. "And soon it will be dinnertime." AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! I ran out of there. And I'm not going back ever again. I'm going to Antarctica to live with the penguins. Penguins are cool. And I don't think they have any ghosts in Antarctica. Or at least they don't have any in their bathrooms.

Well, that's pretty much the way it happened. Maybe the boys' bathroom in our school really is haunted. Maybe we'll get another student teacher. Maybe people will stop climbing in the windows and hiding in the cloakroom. Maybe now that they're married, Miss Mary and Zack will stop smooching all the time. Maybe the Fish Food album will be a big success. Maybe Zack will teach us how to snorkel in a bog. Maybe people in England will stop saying

"bloody" all the time. Maybe people will start calling sausage "sausage." Maybe Superman will zap Batman with his heat vision. Maybe Andrea will make a movie about how to be annoying. Maybe Mr. Granite will buy a new vacuum cleaner. Maybe I'll get one of Zack's bobble head statues. Maybe with Zack gone, Mr. Granite will finally be able to teach his math lesson. But it won't be easy!