05 Fish Farts and Swan Songs

Fish Farts and Swan Songs The next morning, Judy was dig-dig-digging in the dirt around the Toad Pee tent. "What are you doing?" "Digging." Puff, puff, puff. "Digging what?" "I'm making a moat around the Toad Pee tent, Stink." Puff, puff. "Why?" "To protect the Moody crown jewels. Somebody was supposed to stand guard outside the T. P. tent. Somebody was supposed to guard the Royal Moody Sapphire. But somebody left his post." "Somebody got hungry," said Stink. "And tired." "Royal guards do not sleep, Stink. Or eat." She handed Stink a shovel. Stink started digging. Puff, puff.

鱼的屁和天鹅的歌第二天早上，朱迪在蛤蟆尿帐篷周围的泥土里挖啊挖啊挖。 “你在干什么？”“挖”。 噗，噗，噗。“挖什么?”“臭小子，我要在蛤蟆尿帐篷周围建一条护城河。” 吹牛,吹牛。“为什么?”“为了保护穆迪的王冠。 应该有人在T大楼外面站岗。 p .帐篷。应该有人守护皇家穆迪蓝宝石。 但是有人离开了他的岗位。” “有人饿了。”臭臭说。 “又累。”“臭小子，皇家卫队不睡觉。 或者吃。”她递给臭臭一把铲子。 臭臭开始挖坑了。吹牛,吹牛。

"The moat is going to hold all the fishes royal, too." "Fishes royal?" "The Queen of England loves animals. She's had more than thirty palace dogs in her lifetime. And she owns all the fish in the water around England." "For real?" Stink dug some more. Puff, puff, puff. "For real. She even owns all the swans in the Thames River." "What about whales?" "Yep. Them too. And porpoises and dolphins and—" "What about tuna fish?" "All the fish, Stink." "Even stinky sushi?" asked Stink. "Even stinky sushi." Stink stopped digging. He tossed down his shovel. "I'm tired of digging." "But you hardly—" "I'm going over to Webster's for a thumb- wrestling match." "Fine," said Judy. "But don't think when you come home all sweaty you're going to swim in my moat!"

“护城河也将容纳所有的皇家鱼类。” “鱼皇家?”“英国女王喜欢动物。 她一生中养了30多只宫廷犬。 她拥有英国周围水域所有的鱼。” “真的吗?”臭臭又挖了一些。 噗，噗，噗。“真的。 她甚至拥有泰晤士河里所有的天鹅。” “鲸鱼呢？”“是的。 他们太。还有鼠海豚和海豚，还有——”“金枪鱼呢？”“所有的鱼，臭臭。” “即使是臭气熏天的寿司？” “就连臭寿司也不例外。”臭臭停止了挖掘。 他扔下铲子。 “我已经挖够了。”“可是你几乎——”“我要去韦伯斯特参加一场拇指摔跤比赛。” “很好，”朱迪说。“可别以为你满头大汗地回到家，就能在我的护城河里游泳！”

When Stink came home from Webster's house, he ran outside to see the moat. Judy lay on her tummy, staring into a puddle. Something was floating in the puddle! Something shiny. Something red and purple. Something with fan-like fins and a floaty tail. Something that looked an awful-lot-exactly like Stink's Siamese fighting fish! "Is that...?" asked Stink, leaning over to peer into the puddle. "That's my royal fish," said Judy. "That's my royal fish!" cried Stink. "His name is Prince Redmond the First," said Judy. "His name is Spike," said Stink. "He's my Siamese fighting fish that I got at Fur & Fangs with my leftover Tooth Fairy money! You stole him." "I didn't nick him, Stink," said Judy. "I took him by royal decree!" She swept her arm through the air. "I own all the fishes in the kingdom." "I want my fish back." "It's for the greater good, Stink. So the whole queendom can enjoy him." Judy pointed to spit

当臭臭从韦伯斯特家回到家时，他跑出去看护城河。 朱迪趴在地上，眼睛盯着一个水坑。 水坑里漂着什么东西！闪亮的东西。 红色和紫色的东西。有扇形鳍和飘浮尾巴的东西。 那东西看起来和臭臭的暹罗斗鱼一模一样！“那是……？”臭臭问，探过身子往水坑里看。 “这是我的皇家鱼，”朱迪说。 “这是我的宝贝鱼！”臭臭叫道。 “他的名字是雷德蒙一世王子，”朱迪说。 “他叫斯派克。”臭臭说。 “它是我的暹罗斗鱼，是我用牙仙剩下的钱在Fur & Fangs买的！”你把他偷走了。” “我没有抓他，臭臭，”朱迪说。 “我是奉皇上的命令把他带走的！”她在空中挥动手臂。 “我拥有这个王国所有的鱼。” “我想要回我的鱼。”“这是为了大局着想，臭臭。 这样整个王国的人都会喜欢他。” 朱迪指着唾沫

bubbles on the water. "Look, Prince Redmond the First already made a bubble nest." "Guess what," said Stink. "Did you know fish communicate by farting?" "No way," said Judy. "It's true," said Stink. "Spike is probably breaking wind right now." "Royal fish don't fart, Stink." Judy watched more bubbles rise to the surface. Stink leaned over to listen. "Spike is saying, 'Give me back to Stink!'" "Fine." Judy scooped Prince Redmond the Farter into a yogurt container and handed him back to Stink. "A farting fish is not fit for a queen anyway." "Hello, Spiky-Spike-Spike," Stink cooed.

水面上有气泡。“瞧，雷德蒙德一世王子已经造了一个泡泡巢。” “你猜怎么着？”臭臭说。“你知道鱼通过放屁来交流吗？”“不可能，”朱迪说。 “是真的，”臭臭说。“斯派克现在可能在放屁。” “皇家鱼是不会放屁的，臭臭。” 朱迪看着更多的气泡浮出水面。 臭臭凑过去听。 “斯派克在说，‘把我还给臭臭！”“好吧。” 朱迪把“屁王雷德蒙王子”舀进一个酸奶容器里，递给臭臭。 “不管怎样，一条会放屁的鱼是不适合做女王的。” “你好，斯派克——斯派克——斯派克。”

Where-oh-where could she get a royal fish? Judy went down to the creek to look. She knew all about critters in creeks from her after-school Creek Freaks Club. She saw minnows. She saw water striders. She saw common netspinner caddis flies. She spotted dragonfly larva. She spotted beetle larva. She even scooped up a water-penny beetle. She tried to catch a minnow, but it slipped away too fast. If only she had a royal swan! She, Judy Moody, was the queen of no one. The boss of nothing. Not even a farting fish. Not even a minnow. Just then, she, Judy Moody, got a gobsmacking-great idea. Maybe, just maybe, she could get a swan to come to her! A trumpeter swan, just like Louis in The Trumpet of the Swan. Judy dug out her Backyard Becky magazines. Backyard Becky said swans ate birdseed. Judy dumped a bag of birdseed all around her moat. Backyard Becky said swans liked the color red. Judy put out a pile of red things— a red bucket, a red boot, a red ball. Backyard Becky said swans called to each other.

她上哪儿去弄一条皇家鱼呢？ 朱迪到小溪边去看。 她在课后的小溪怪物俱乐部里对小溪里的生物了如指掌。 她看到了鲦鱼。她看到了水黾。 她看到了普通的网麻蛾。 她发现了蜻蜓的幼虫。 她发现了甲虫幼虫。她甚至还捞起了一只水便士甲虫。 她想抓一条鲦鱼，但它跑得太快了。 要是她有一只皇家天鹅就好了！她，朱迪·穆迪，不是任何人的女王。 什么都不是的老板。甚至连一条会放屁的鱼都没有。 连一条小鱼都没有。就在那时，她，朱迪·穆迪，有了一个惊人的好主意。 也许，只是也许，她可以让一只天鹅来到她身边！一只号手天鹅，就像《天鹅的小号》里的路易斯。 朱迪翻出她的《后院贝基》杂志。 贝基说天鹅吃鸟食。 朱迪把一袋鸟食倒在她的护城河上。 贝基说天鹅喜欢红色。 朱迪拿出一堆红色的东西——一个红桶，一只红靴子，一个红球。 后院的贝基说天鹅会互相呼唤。