Chapter 1

here's hank fakes, snakes and weird wizards

这是汉克假人，蛇和奇怪的巫师

chapter 1 "Hank!" my sister, Emily, yelled, as she ran up to me and grabbed my arm. "You have to come meet Ginger. She's the cutest snake I've ever seen." "Emily," I said, "long slimy reptiles with no eyelids or ears are not cute. They're creepy." "Ginger's not slimy. Her skin is dry. Come pet her." "I don't pet snakes, or anything else that could eat me whole for lunch." Our family was spending the morning at the West End Avenue street fair. The whole block was lined with booths selling everything from blueberry muffins to tube socks. Leave it to Emily to find the one snake booth. That girl can sniff out a reptile better than my dog, Cheerio, can sniff out a hunk of pot roast under the dining-room table.

“汉克！”我妹妹艾米丽喊道，她跑过来抓住我的胳膊。 “你一定要来见见金格。 她是我见过的最可爱的蛇。” “艾米丽，”我说，“没有眼皮和耳朵的又长又粘的爬行动物可不可爱。 他们令人毛骨悚然。”“姜不是黏糊糊的。 她的皮肤很干。来摸摸她吧。” “我不喜欢蛇，也不喜欢任何能把我整个吃掉的东西。” 我们全家在西区大街的集市上度过了一个上午。 整个街区都摆满了各种各样的摊位，从蓝莓松饼到筒袜，应有尽有。 让艾米丽去找那个蛇亭吧。 那女孩嗅爬行动物的能力比我的狗狗麦圈嗅餐桌下一大块炖肉的能力还强。

Ignoring Emily, I headed for a booth that was selling cool comic books. Emily stood there and stomped her foot. "Mom! Dad!" she whined. "This isn't fair. We just spent twenty minutes waiting for Hank to taste every flavor of ice cream when we knew he was going to pick cherry-vanilla all along. Now the family should do something I want to do." "Emily has a good point, Hank," my mom said. "I think we should all go say hello to Ginger the snake." "Fine," I muttered. "But I'm not touching her with any part of my body. I will use my eyes and that's it." We walked over to a large purple sign that read RALPH'S REPTILE SHOW. Under the sign, there was a table with some reptiles displayed in different kinds of glass tanks. A giant tortoise was sitting in the middle of the table. And when I say giant, I mean giant. That guy's shell was as big as my bathroom sink. In front of the table was Ralph himself, with a long orange, yellow,

我不理睬艾米丽，径直走向一个卖漫画书的摊位。 爱米丽站在那里跺着脚。 “妈妈!爸爸！”“这不公平。 我们只花了二十分钟等汉克尝遍各种口味的冰淇淋，而我们知道他会一直挑樱桃香草口味的。 现在这个家庭应该做一些我想做的事情。” “艾米丽说得对，汉克，”我妈妈说。 “我想我们都应该去和蛇金格打个招呼。” “好吧，”我喃喃地说。“但我不会用身体的任何部位碰她。 我会用我的眼睛，就是这样。” 我们走到一块紫色的大牌子前，上面写着“拉尔夫的爬行动物展”。 招牌下面有一张桌子，上面放着一些爬行动物，它们被陈列在不同种类的玻璃罐里。 一只巨大的乌龟坐在桌子中间。 我说的巨人，就是巨人。 那家伙的壳和我浴室的水槽一样大。 拉尔夫本人站在桌子前面，手里拿着一根长长的橙、黄、

and black striped snake wrapped around his arm. "There's Ginger!" Emily screamed. "Hi, Emily," Ralph said. "Oh, I see you've brought your family over to meet Ginger." "They're all so excited to get to know her," Emily said, reaching out to stroke Ginger's long back. "Make that all but one of us," I added quickly. "I hope this doesn't hurt your feelings, Ralph, but I'm not a big snake petter."

黑色条纹蛇缠绕在他的手臂上。 “姜!”艾米丽尖叫。 “嗨，艾米丽，”拉尔夫说。“哦，我看到你带着你的家人来见金格了。” “他们都很兴奋能认识她，”爱米丽说着，伸出手抚摸着金格长长的后背。 “让我们除了一个人以外都这样吧。”我赶紧补充道。 “我希望这不会伤害你的感情，拉尔夫，但我不是一个大蛇彼得。”

"Well, then maybe I can interest you in Clive, my snow leopard gecko," Ralph said. "Or Boris, my adorable blue-tailed skink." Okay, I don't even know what a skink is. But it sounds too close to "stink" for me to even consider petting it. Ralph was wearing a tan floppy hat that looked like his head had sweated in it for at least a hundred years. He had on a brown shirt and shorts, brown construction boots, and a shirt with a million pockets and zippers. Maybe that's where he keeps his skinks. "Is that tortoise even alive?" I asked Ralph. "He's not moving." "You mean Speedy?" Ralph petted the tortoise's bumpy head with two fingers. "He's probably just thinking about the lettuce leaf he had for lunch. If you want a little more excitement, you should get to know Ginger. She's a hoot." Ralph moved his arm so that Ginger's face

“那么，也许我可以让你对克莱夫感兴趣，我的雪豹壁虎，”拉尔夫说。 “或者鲍里斯，我可爱的蓝尾小蜥蜴。” 好吧，我都不知道石龙子是什么。 但它听起来太“臭”了，我甚至不会考虑抚摸它。 拉尔夫戴着一顶棕褐色的软帽，看起来他的头已经在里面泡了至少一百年了。 他穿着一件棕色的衬衫和短裤，棕色的施工靴，还有一件有无数个口袋和拉链的衬衫。 也许那就是他放石龙子的地方。 “那只乌龟还活着吗？”我问拉尔夫。 “他没动。”“你是说飞毛腿？”拉尔夫用两个手指抚摸着乌龟凹凸不平的脑袋。 “他可能只是在想他午餐吃的生菜叶。 如果你想更刺激一点，你应该去认识金吉。 她真有趣。”拉尔夫挪了挪胳膊，好让金格的脸贴近

was very close to my nose. Maybe it wasn't very close, but it was close enough for me to jump way back. "Look at Hank," Emily laughed. "Afraid of a little snake." "I'm not afraid, exactly," I told her. "I just don't happen to love snakes the same way you do. Maybe I'm not an animal person." "You love Cheerio, don't you?" "Of course. But Cheerio's a dog, which means you can play ball with him. And take him for a walk. Last time I checked, they don't make leashes for snakes." "Snakes are very sweet in their own way," Ralph said. "Take Ginger, for instance. She's a mud snake. She loves children. She's a big hit at kids' birthday parties." "Wow," Emily said. "I wish she could come to mine. It's coming up soon. I already sent out the invitations and everything." Ralph reached down to the stack of brochures he had on the table and handed my dad one.

离我的鼻子很近。 也许不是很近，但也足够让我往回跳了。 “看看汉克，”艾米丽笑着说。 “怕一条小蛇。” “确切地说，我并不害怕，”我告诉她。 “我只是不像你那样喜欢蛇。 也许我不喜欢动物。” “你喜欢麦圈，不是吗？”“当然。 但是Cheerio是一只狗，这意味着你可以和他一起打球。 带他出去走走。据我所知，他们没有给蛇做皮带。” “蛇有它们自己的甜蜜之处，”拉尔夫说。 “以金格为例。 她是一条泥蛇。她喜欢孩子。 她在孩子们的生日派对上很受欢迎。” “哇，”艾米丽说。“我希望她能来我家。 马上就要到了。我已经发出了请柬和所有的东西。” 拉尔夫把手伸到桌上的一叠小册子上，递给我爸爸一本。