Chapter 1

Here's hank. Hooray, my butt left the bench

这是汉克。太好了，我的屁股离开了长凳

CHAPTER 1 "I have a great idea," I said to my best friends, Frankie Townsend and Ashley Wong. "After school today, let's put on a worm race. Not just any worm race. The First-Ever Hank Zipzer Uphill Worm Sprint." It was Taco Tuesday, and we were in our school lunchroom eating—you guessed it— tacos. I like mine with no onions. "Two problems," Frankie said, his mouth full of cheese and beans. "Number one: Worms are slow and slimy." "Yeah," Ashley agreed. "It's so gross when they leave that icky slime trail." "No, slime is good," I said. "The trail will give us proof of which worm crosses the finish line first." "Okay, Zip, I'll give you that," Frankie said. "But we still have problem number two. Where

“我有一个好主意，”我对我最好的朋友弗兰基·汤森和阿什利·王说。 “今天放学后，我们来一场蚯蚓赛跑。 不是任何一种蠕虫。有史以来第一次汉克·齐泽尔爬坡蠕虫冲刺" 今天是墨西哥卷饼星期二，我们在学校的餐厅吃着——你猜对了——墨西哥卷饼。 我喜欢不放洋葱的。 “有两个问题，”弗兰基说，嘴里塞满了奶酪和豆子。 “第一：蠕虫很慢，而且黏糊糊的。” “是啊，"艾希礼同意了。“它们留下的黏糊糊的痕迹太恶心了。” “不，黏液是好的，”我说。 “这条小径将证明哪只虫子第一个冲过终点线。” “好吧，次波，我会给你的，”弗兰基说。 “但我们还有第二个问题。 在

are we going to find these speedy worms?" "I've got that solved," I said. "I saw three of them sticking their heads out of the dirt in the planter in front of our building this morning. They were practically begging me to let them race. I bet they'll be there after school." Ashley and Frankie gave each other a weird look. "Actually, Hank," Ashley said slowly. "Frankie and I are busy after school today." "Busy doing what? The three of us always do an after-school activity together." "Listen, Zip," Frankie said, putting his hotsauce- covered hand on my shoulder. "Ashley and I have been asked to be on the second- grade basketball team. The one that's going to play PS 91 in our yearly game."

我们能找到这些速度飞快的虫子吗？”“我已经解决了，”我说。 这个人说：“今天早上，我在我们楼前的花盆里看到三个人把头伸出来。 他们几乎是求我让他们参加比赛。 我打赌他们放学后会在那儿。” 艾希礼和弗兰基奇怪地对视了一下。 “事实上，汉克，"艾希礼慢慢地说。 “弗兰基和我今天放学后很忙。” “忙什么？”我们三个经常一起参加课外活动。” “听着，次波，”弗兰基说，把沾满辣酱的手放在我的肩膀上。 “阿什利和我被邀请加入二年级篮球队。 它将在我们的年度游戏中使用ps91。”

That totally took me by surprise. "Really?" I said. "How come I didn't hear about this?" Ashley pushed her sparkly purple glasses up on her nose. "Well," she said, "they only asked the kids who are really good at basketball in gym class. Anyone else who wants to be on the team can come to tryouts. There are still some open spots." I was quiet as her words bounced around in my brain like a Ping-Pong ball. Frankie knew

这完全出乎我的意料。 “真的吗?”我说。“我怎么没听说这件事？”艾希礼把她那副闪闪发光的紫色眼镜推到鼻子上。 “嗯，”她说，“他们只在体育课上问那些篮球打得很好的孩子。 任何想加入队伍的人都可以来参加选拔赛。 还有一些空缺职位。” 她的话像乒乓球一样在我脑子里蹦来蹦去，我很安静。 弗兰基知道

what I was thinking. "Hey, don't feel bad, Zip," he said. "They only asked certain kids because this is a really important game. Our school has beaten PS 91 two years in a row. If we win this year, it will be a three-peat. The first three-peat ever in the whole history of PS 87!" "But I want to play, too," I said. "It says right on my report card that I play well with others." "You sure do, Zip. But you have to admit, you're not that great at basketball." "What exactly are you saying, Frankie? That I'm short?" "No, that's not it," Frankie said. "Look at Ashley. She's short and she's on the team." Ouch, that hurt. "I'm not short," Ashley said. "I like to think of myself as vertically challenged." "Me too," I said. "I'm going to ask the coach if I can try out." "Why not?" Ashley said. "It never hurts to try. If you don't, you'll never know."

我在想什么。“嘿，别难过，次波，”他说。 “他们只邀请了一些孩子，因为这是一场非常重要的比赛。 我们学校连续两年击败了ps91。 如果我们今年赢了，那将是三连冠。 这是ps87历史上第一次三连冠！”“但我也想玩，”我说。 “我的成绩单上写着，我和别人相处得很好。” “你当然知道，小波。但你必须承认，你并不擅长篮球。” “你到底在说什么，弗兰基？” 我很矮吗？”“不，不是这样的，”弗兰基说。 “看看艾希礼。她很矮，而且是队里的一员。” 哎哟，好疼。“我不矮，"艾希礼说。 “我喜欢把自己想象成一个纵向挑战的人。” “我也是，”我说。“我要去问教练我是否可以试一试。” “为什么不?”阿什利说。“试一试永远不会有坏处。 如果你不知道，你永远不会知道。”

"Okay, I'm going to do it. By the way, who is the coach?" "Ms. Adolf," Ashley said, "the fourth-grade teacher." I felt my throat tighten up, then the rest of my body followed. "You mean the one who looks like she swallowed a lemon?" I squeaked. "Yup," Frankie answered. "Old sourpuss herself." That wasn't what I wanted to hear. It was hard enough to ask to be on a team that nobody wanted you on. But now I was going to have to ask the meanest teacher on the whole planet Earth. Just looking at Ms. Adolf scared me down to my bones. Her hair was gray. Her clothes were gray. Her face was gray. Even her breath was gray. "Hey, look," Ashley said, pointing across the room. "Ms. Adolf is on lunch patrol. She's standing over there by the desserts, making sure no one takes one."

“好吧，我要这么做。 顺便问一下，教练是谁？””女士。 阿道夫，”希礼说，“四年级的老师。” 我感到喉咙紧绷，然后身体的其他部分也跟着紧绷起来。 “你是说那个看起来像吞了柠檬的人吗？”我发出“吱吱”的响声。 “是的，”弗兰基回答。“老愁眉苦脸。” 那不是我想听的。 要求加入一个没人想要你的团队已经够难的了。 但现在我要去问这个世界上最刻薄的老师了。 一看阿道夫小姐，我就吓得魂不附体。 她的头发是灰白的。她的衣服是灰色的。 她脸色苍白。连她的呼吸都是灰色的。 “嘿，你看，"艾希礼指着房间那头说。 阿道夫女士负责午餐巡逻。 她站在甜点旁边，确保没人吃。”