Chapter 4

Chapter four, Frankie and I stayed at the Crunchy Pickle for over an hour, eating our sandwiches and working on our lines. As more customers came in, my mom said she needed the booth. So I kissed her good bye and Papa Pete took Frankie and me and, I'm sorry to say, Emily back to our apartment building. Frankie lives on the fourth floor, and my family lives on the tenth. He and I have a special clubhouse in the basement, right next to the laundry room. It's actually a storage room that we made into our clubhouse. We hang out there because it's really fun. Also, the air smells like soap suds, which is very refreshing for my

nose. When we got home, we tried to continue our work on my dining-room table. My dad even moved his computer down to one end to make room for us. Also he put on shoes so we didn't have to look at his toenails. As Frankie and I started going over the lines, my dad looked up from his computer screen.

"That doesn't sound like schoolwork to me," he said. "We're getting ready to audition for our class play," Frankie explained.

"Hank, you should be working on your writing and arithmetic skills," my dad said. "No one ever did well on a test by being in a play." "This play is going to be really fun, Dad," I said. "And very educational, too." "Oh, really?" my dad snapped. "Well then, how much is forty minus eighteen?" I looked in every corner of my mind for the answer. It was nowhere to be found. My brain can hear numbers, but it has no idea what to do with them. I mean, addition is hard. But subtraction is out of the question. "I'll get back to you with the answer, Dad," I said. "In about five years." "Trust me, Hank, it won't be that long," he said. "After dinner, I'm getting out the flash cards. It's going to be an all-subtraction evening."

What a horrible thought. Then, even more horribly, Emily decided to take her baby pet iguana, Katherine, on a walk around the apartment. Every time they passed, Katherine shot her tongue out and tried to touch my knuckles. One time she actually did. And let me tell you, iguana tongue is very sticky and rough. "Okay," I announced. "That does it for me. It's clubhouse time." "You don't have to leave," Emily said. "Katherine enjoys the company." "Oh, really? Then why is she hissing at us

like a fire-breathing dragon?" Frankie asked. "That's her way of saying give me a hug." "Well, tell her my body is a hug-free zone," I answered. "Especially when it comes to lizards." "She's an iguana, Hank." "Whatever she is, she's ugly." With that, a superloud hiss flew out of Katherine's throat. Frankie and I dashed out of the apartment and into the elevator. Forty-two seconds later, we were in our clubhouse in the basement. But there was already someone there! As we rushed in, we saw a woman in a flowered dress standing on a ladder. Holding the ladder steady was a girl about our age. A girl in our clubhouse? No, that's not in the rulebook. "Hi," the girl said, turning to us. "I'm Ashley Wong. I just moved into the building, and I'm starting second grade tomorrow at PS Eighty- Seven."