Chapter 3

Chapter three After school that day, Papa Pete picked up Frankie and me. Frankie's mom is a yoga instructor, and she teaches every Friday afternoon. She is so good at yoga that she can lift her foot off the floor and squeeze her nose with her toes like they're a swimmer's clip. While Frankie's mom's teaching, Papa Pete takes Frankie and me to the Crunchy Pickle. That's the deli on 77th Street and Broadway that Papa Pete used to own. Now my mom is taking it over and trying to turn it into a healthy sandwich shop. That is very bad news for salami. As we walked toward the Crunchy Pickle, Frankie and I couldn't stop talking about the

第三章那天放学后，皮特爸爸来接我和弗兰基。 弗兰基的妈妈是一名瑜伽教练，她每周五下午授课。 她非常擅长瑜伽，她可以把脚从地板上抬起来，用脚趾捏鼻子，就像游泳运动员的夹子一样。 在弗兰基妈妈上课的时候，皮特爸爸带我和弗兰基去了脆皮泡菜店。 那是皮特爸爸以前在77街和百老汇交口开的熟食店。 现在我妈接手了，想把它变成一家健康三明治店。 这对意大利腊肠来说是个坏消息。 当我们走向脆泡菜店时，弗兰基和我一直在谈论

play. Actually, I did all the talking, and Frankie did all the listening. "I was in a play once when I was your age," Papa Pete said when I finally took a breath. "Were you the star?" I asked him. "Not exactly. I played a tube of toothpaste, but it was a very important tube. Harold Dunski was the star. He was lucky enough to get the part of Mr. Toothbrush." "What's so lucky about that?" I asked. "Are you kidding, Hankie?" Papa Pete said. "Harold got to sing the big opening number. It was called 'Don't Forget to Flush and Brush.' The girls went crazy. In fact, years later he married the girl who played the sink." "No offense, Papa Pete," Frankie said, "but this is kind of a disgusting story." "Well, I'm just pointing out that being in a play is a lot of fun, but it's also a lot of work. You have rehearsals to go to, lines to memorize..." "That's the part that scares me the most," I said. "I'm pretty bad at memorizing. I can't even

玩了。事实上，我一直在说，弗兰基一直在听。 “我像你这么大的时候，曾经演过一出戏。”当我终于缓过气来的时候，皮特爸爸说。 “你是那个明星吗？”我问他。 “不完全是。我扮演了一管牙膏，但这是一管非常重要的牙膏。 哈罗德·邓斯基是明星。 他很幸运地得到了牙刷先生这个角色。” “这有什么好幸运的？”我问。 “你在开玩笑吧，汉克？”皮特爸爸说。 哈罗德演唱了开场的重要曲目。 它被称为“不要忘记冲洗和刷牙”。女孩们都疯了。 事实上，多年以后，他娶了那个会吹水槽的女孩。” “无意冒犯，皮特爸爸，”弗兰基说，“但这是一个令人作呕的故事。” “嗯，我只是想指出，出演一部戏很有趣，但也很辛苦。 你要去排练，要背台词……” “这是我最害怕的部分，”我说。 “我的记忆力很差。 我甚至不能

remember how to spell neighbor." "Don't be so hard on yourself, Hankie," Papa Pete said. "You're clever. You'll figure it out." I wasn't so sure he was right about that. We had reached the entrance to the Crunchy Pickle. Papa Pete pulled open the glass door. Frankie and I dashed to the counter that held the black-and-white cookies. They've been our favorite ever since I can remember. Just before we grabbed two, my mom came out from the back room. "Whoa there, mister," she said. "No cookies until you've had a healthy snack. I have some fresh soylami right here." My mom is trying to bring luncheon meats into the twenty-first century. She makes everything out of soy. Soylami, which tastes nothing like salami. Soystrami, which makes your tongue want to go home without eating. And the worst is soyloney, which doesn't even look like baloney. In fact, it's yellow.

记住如何拼写邻居。” “别对自己太苛刻了，汉克，”皮特爸爸说。 “你聪明。你会明白的。” 我不太确定他说的对不对。 我们已经到了脆皮泡菜店的入口。 皮特爸爸拉开了玻璃门。 弗兰基和我冲到柜台前，柜台上放着黑白饼干。 从我记事起，它们就是我们的最爱。 就在我们拿两个之前，我妈妈从后面的房间出来了。 “哇，先生，”她说。 “在你吃了健康的零食之前不要吃饼干。 我这里有一些新鲜的豆豉。” 我妈妈想把午餐肉带进21世纪。 她用大豆做所有的东西。 豆豉，尝起来一点都不像意大利腊肠。 豆浆，让你的舌头不想吃东西就想回家。 最糟糕的是假的，看起来都不像假的。 事实上，它是黄色的。

"Mom!" I protested. "Frankie and I have a lot of work to do, and we need real brain food." "Look at your sister," she answered. "See how nicely she's sitting in that front booth enjoying her soy-meat platter?" My sister, Emily, who is in the first grade, does everything perfectly. It's just like her to enjoy fake meat. She also likes doing her homework, reading about lizards, clipping her toenails, and getting all As. She is so annoying. "Why don't you boys find a seat," Papa Pete said. "I'll make you a real sandwich, with some pickles on the side."

“妈妈!”我抗议道。“弗兰基和我有很多工作要做，我们需要真正的健脑食品。” “看看你的妹妹，”她回答说。 “看到她坐在前面的摊位上享受她的豆肉拼盘有多漂亮了吗？”我的妹妹，艾米丽，她在一年级，做每件事都很完美。 她就是喜欢吃假肉。 她还喜欢做家庭作业，阅读关于蜥蜴的书，剪脚趾甲，并且所有的成绩都是a。 她真烦人。“为什么你们不找个座位，”皮特爸爸说。 “我要给你做一个真正的三明治，配上一些咸菜。”

Papa Pete is just the best. He saves the day, every day. Frankie and I slid into a booth far away from Emily. We reached into our backpacks and each pulled out a copy of the play. As soon as I turned to the first page, my brain froze like a Popsicle. "I can't read this," I said to Frankie. "It's too many words." "Yes you can, Hank. Let's go very slowly." Frankie read the summary of the story. "It's about a boy named Barry who falls asleep in the library," he explained. "While he's asleep, the books come alive and jump off the shelves." "Wow, that sounds great. Does it say what kinds of books?" Frankie nodded. "The books are all the

皮特爸爸是最棒的。 他每天都在拯救世界。 弗兰基和我溜进了一个远离艾米丽的隔间。 我们把手伸进背包，每人拿出一份剧本。 我一翻到第一页，脑子就像冰棒一样僵住了。 “我看不懂，”我对弗兰基说。 “话太多了。”“你可以的，汉克。 我们慢慢走吧。”弗兰基读了故事的摘要。 “讲的是一个叫巴里的男孩在图书馆睡着了，”他解释说。 “当他睡着的时候，书就会活过来，从书架上跳下来。” “哇，听起来不错。上面说了是什么书吗？”弗兰基点点头。 “书是所有的

characters the class is going to play. Look, there's a book on volcanoes." "That'd be great for Luke Whitman," I said. "His nose is always full of lava." We cracked up, and Frankie went on. "Let's see. There's a biography of Martin Luther King Jr. And a mystery story called The Secret of Big Bear Lake. Here's a scary one called My Babysitter Is a Zombie. And look at this weird one—The History of Shoes Up to the Flip-Flop. You interested in that part?" "No," I said, shaking my head. "I can't stand anything between my toes." "Oh, this book is cool," Frankie said,

班级将要扮演的角色。 看，有一本关于火山的书。” “那对卢克·惠特曼来说太好了，”我说。 “他的鼻子里总是充满了熔岩。” 我们大笑起来，弗兰基接着说。 “让我们看看。有一本马丁·路德·金的传记。 还有一个神秘的故事叫做大熊湖的秘密。 这个很恐怖，叫《我的保姆是僵尸》 看看这个奇怪的——从鞋到人字拖的历史。 你对那部分感兴趣吗？”“不，”我说，摇了摇头。 “我脚趾间什么都站不起来。” “哦，这本书真酷，”弗兰基说，