6 Myrtle—Rhymes with Turtle

CHAPTER SIX MYRTLE- RHYMES WITH TURTLE SIMON PUT THE bucket down and the three of us walked toward her. We didn't know what to say. We didn't know who she was—or why she was there. It didn't matter. She spoke first. "How much?" she asked real loud. "Excuse me?" Rosie asked. "I said, 'How much?'" "Umm, I'm not sure what you mean," Rosie said slowly. "Can we help you with something?"

"You have to speak up, missy!" the old woman called and brought her hand up to her ear. "I can't hear a doggone thing anymore. They gave me this dumb gadget to help me hear better! I'll tell you what I hear now. Buzzing! That's right: buzzing! Like there are mosquitoes having a party in my ear!" "Umm," Rosie said. "I don't have all day, kiddies," the woman said. "Can't you tell I'm as old as the hills? I remember when this whole area was a soybean farm. Soybeans! You know who eats soybeans? Cows and pigs and chickens! And then we eat the cows and pigs and chickens. Seems to me we ought to just eat the soybeans. Don't you think?"

"Yes," I said. "What?" she yelled. "What did you say? I can't

hear too good! Did I tell you that? Buzzing! Gosh- darned mosquitoes—that's what it sounds like!" "Yes!" I repeated a lot louder. "Eating the soybeans first would make more sense. That would make the cows and pigs and chickens a lot happier too." "Now you're talking! I like you three already!" the woman called. She waved her hand at the clean blue Toyota Camry and then at her own red one. "My name is Myrtle. Rhymes with turtle. So, how much?" Rosie figured it out first. She usually does. "I think she wants us to wash her car," Rosie whispered. It made sense to me and Simon then too. "You want us to wash your car, ma'am? Umm, Myrtle?" Simon asked. He was talking loudly now too. We all were. It was kind of funny. "Well, what do you think?" she yelled. "Why else would I be here? To buy groceries? Get gas? Harvest

soybeans? Of course I want a car wash! That's why you're here, isn't it?" "Umm, sure," Rosie answered loudly. Then in a lower voice she said to me and Simon, "I think we better just wash her car." Simon and I both nodded. "Okay, but we need to hurry up. Dad's getting closer every minute," Simon whispered to us. Then, in a louder voice, he said to Myrtle, "You don't need to pay us."

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