Chapter 3

Chapter 3 The World's Greatest Detective needs to look good. So I put on a new tie. Then Nina helped me onto my skateboard and began pushing me to the train station. Normally, it's pretty scary when she pushes me through the city, because she is not as careful of traffic as she should be. I have nearly been run over by cars, trucks, buses, and, once, a nun on roller skates. But this time everybody stopped to let us pass because they could hear us coming. SQUEAK SQUEAK SQUEAK

"Nina!" I shouted. "One of the skateboard wheels is squeaking!" "Big squeal," agreed Nina. "Well," I said, "I think it's more of a squeak. What should we do about it?" "Eat it?" asked Nina. "NO!" I shouted. "Then we'll never get to the train station to solve the mystery of the world's greatest pickle paperw—" "We're there," interrupted Nina. She stopped the skateboard so quickly that my pot went flying across the train station and landed sideways in front of a very fancy poodle. "Greetings," said the very fancy poodle. "I am the Countess Zuzu Poodle-doo. And you must be the... the World's Greatest Detective?"

"I'm—urgh!—working on it," I said, struggling to get my pot upright. "And—yurgh!—now I am— blurgh!—working on your case." "My butler will help you," said the Countess. The butler, a very serious looking Chihuahua, picked me up, dusted off my pot, and placed it back on my skateboard.

"Thank you!" I said. "Also, I apologize for the fact that my goat is eating your top hat." "Very good, sir," said the butler, very properly putting the half-eaten hat back on his head. "My name is Inspector Flytrap, and this is my assistant, Nina the Goat. She's a goat." "Very good, sir," said the butler, very politely. "My name is MC FunkyFoot, and I am at your service." "MC FunkyFoot seems like a strange name for a butler," I said. "My parents always dreamed that I'd be a rap star," said MC FunkyFoot.

"Mister FunkyFoot! Would you please stop talking about things other than my pickle paperweight?" screeched the Countess. "Inspector Flytrap needs to get right to work!" "Very good, ma'am," MC FunkyFoot and I said at the same time. "I just arrived by train," said the Countess. "But my world's greatest pickle paper-weight was stolen during the trip! Your job is to find it! So get busy!"

I could tell already that the Countess liked for things to go her way, and her way only. I hoped she wouldn't notice that Nina was eating the flowers off her hat.