Chapter 8

CHAPTER 8 Toto could scarcely believe it. The last time she'd encountered her nemesis, he had escaped on a balloon from the top of the Holt Stage at the Catstonbury Music Festival. She'd often wondered where he'd ended up since then, but he was the last animal she expected to meet here. 'Get behind me NOW,' Toto commanded her brothers and Catface. She took up her fighting pose, ready to face off with the Archduke.

'Calm down, Toto. As hard as this will be for you to understand, I come in peace. 'PEACE? You don't know the meaning of the word,' scoffed Silver. 'That's hurtful,' replied ADF. 'I might have some issues with it, but I know its meaning. It means not fighting... Doesn't it?' he asked, a little unsure. 'See! Get him, sis,' yelled Socks. 'Toto, before you and I engage in combat- which, I admit, would be A LOT OF FUN; I haven't had a good dust-up for ages- hear me out. Then, if you don't believe me and you REALLY want to, we can fight. And if you win, I promise you can take me back to Larry and lock me up and throw away the key, blah blah blah. Deal?' 'I'm listening,' the ninja replied warily. 'Thank you,' he answered sarcastically as he sat down, leaning back casually on one of the passed-

out dogs. 'Here, Socks, my dear young man, could you help me get these boots off? They're terribly uncomfortable.' Incredibly, the little cat obliged; it was clear ADF was quite the charmer when he wanted to be. 'Oh, hello, Catface old chum. Nice to see you again,' he beamed. 'I say, do you remember the night back when Larry and I were at ninja school together and the three of us were so hungry we broke in and stole that whole fillet of beef from the Savoy... Only naughty

thing Larry has ever done! Wonderful night 'Wasn't it?' replied Catface. 'The most marvellous evening. I tell you what, the look on the chef's fa—' 'AHEM, Toto interrupted, glaring at Catface. 'Ah, yes, sorry, well, you do know we were good friends once and he always has been very charming. The little ninja turned back to ADF. 'You are on the list of the world's most wanted animals, you have tried to kill me at least twice, you are the sworn enemy of my mentor, and you are currently in charge of an army about to march on Edinburgh destroying everything in its path. So STOP CHARMING EVERYONE and start explaining yourself!' 'All right, all right! Why does it all have to be so "business" with you goodies? You need to relax.' Toto made to unsheathe her claws and ADF held his paws up in defeat- 'OK, you win!'- then crossed his legs and settled into his story:

'After you defeated King Roderick the Spotlessly Clean I tracked him down and enlisted his help. I needed a new army for my plans for world domination and since you sent my last two armies to prison, which was quite unsporting of you, I came up with a frankly ingenious plan. "Generals Drummond and Munro" would take over the correctional facility at Glenview and let the army come to US! All we needed to do was send the good animals back home, keep the really naughty ones here by making sure they failed their tasks, then get them onside and hey presto: you've got yourself an army of wrong'uns. Ta da! Why are you telling us? Hasn't it worked?' Toto asked. 'It HAS worked... too well. You might not have realised how big the camp has become, but we have over a THOUSAND animals who will do our bidding, Roderick has beefed up on an all-protein diet so he's

in incredible shape, and WE ARE MARCHING ON EDINBURGH TONIGHT. Our plan is to take Edinburgh, then head south, conquering every city as we go, ending up in London, where we vanquish you and Larry, putting an end to the Ninja Cats, and I finally get to run the show. Et voilà.' Toto was still confused... VERY CONFUSED. 'He's up to something, sis. Get him, Silver yelled. 'I'm not up to anything, my young Italian friend, so if it's all the same to you, can we leave the "get him" until you've heard me out. After all, I've saved all of your lives already, twice!' 'WHAT?' gasped Toto. 'Of course I have,' ADF said with glee. 'Who else did you think saved you? Up the mountain, who do you think pulled you all to safety? And who exactly do you think lit the fire that guided you to the island? Moi!' 'But we thought that was Felis,' Toto muttered to