Chapter 5

chapter five This wasteland world beyond Wakefield is strange. It is lush, overgrown, and wild. Greens and pinks and oranges and blues. It's like a warped version of the old world— ripped, stretched, and recolored by some angry kid with a crayon. It's pretty scary. But at least it's pretty scary. In fact, if Jack was here—I'd use his camera to snap a pic of the strange scenery. But like I said, I'm alone. Without my friends. Now, don't get me wrong, my friends are rad. But they stink! Like, literally—their bodies emit foul odors. And okay, I know, I probably don't exactly smell like the inside of a Bath & Body Works myself. Personal hygiene is nobody's number

韦克菲尔德之外的荒原世界很奇怪。 它郁郁葱葱，杂草丛生，野生。 绿色，粉色，橙色和蓝色。 它就像是旧世界的扭曲版——被某个愤怒的孩子用蜡笔撕开、拉伸，然后重新上色。 这很可怕。但至少它相当可怕。 事实上，如果杰克在这里，我会用他的相机拍下这奇怪的风景。 但就像我说的，我是一个人。 没有我的朋友。别误会，我的朋友们都很酷。 但是它们很臭！就像，他们的身体散发出难闻的气味。 好吧，我知道，我可能闻起来也不像沐浴美体店的味道。 个人卫生不是谁的号码

one priority during the apocalypse. Plus, washing leads to serious FOMO—what's worse than being in the shower, hearing something super fun going on outside, racing to finish up, hop out, dry off—and then by the time you're dressed, all the fun is over! But at least I make an effort! I swear, it's like Jack and Quint and Dirk are proud of their mussy morning hair, lazy tooth brushing, and ability to "burp supersonically." But our monster friends are even worse...

天启期间的首要任务。 另外，洗衣服会导致严重的fomo——比洗澡更糟糕的是，听到外面发生的超级有趣的事情，赶紧洗完，跳出去，擦干，当你穿好衣服的时候，所有的乐趣都结束了！但至少我努力了！我发誓，就像杰克，昆特和德克为他们早上凌乱的头发，懒惰的刷牙和“超音速打嗝”的能力而自豪一样。 但我们的怪物朋友更糟糕……

Right now, though, the only stink that I smell is MY OWN STINK. And I start to grin as I realize... you know what this means? June adventure, June, an adventure. Time for a June solo adventure. Or, wait... does "June Solo Adventure" sound too much like a Star Wars thing? Like an adventure about Han Solo's kid sister

但现在，我闻到的只有我自己的臭味。 我开始笑，因为我意识到…… 你知道这意味着什么吗？六月的冒险，六月的冒险。 六月独自冒险的时间到了。 或者,等待……《六月独自冒险》听起来是不是太像星球大战了？ 比如汉·索罗妹妹的冒险故事

"June Solo"? I mean, I know Han doesn't have a kid sister, 'cause Quint has explained the Solo and Skywalker family bloodlines to me about a dozen times even though I could not care any— "WAIT!" I exclaim, and I actually exclaim it out loud, to no one. "Quint's not here! I can call this whatever kind of adventure I want! And JUNE SOLO ADVENTURE IT IS!" And the goal of this June Solo Adventure? Get back to Wakefield. But that's when IT hits me. And the IT isn't a thought or an idea—the IT is a thing. A wet and rubbery and gooey thing that hits me in the face at about a thousand miles an hour—

“6月独奏”?我是说，我知道阿韩没有妹妹，因为昆特已经给我解释了十几次索罗和天行者家族的血统，尽管我一点也不在乎——“等等！”我大声说出来，我真的大声说出来，没有对任何人说。 “昆特不在这儿！”我想怎么叫它冒险都可以！这就是六月的独自冒险！”那么今年六月的单人冒险的目标是什么呢？ 回维克菲尔德去。但就在这时，我突然想到了。 IT不是一个思想或一个想法——IT是一个事物。 一个又湿又黏的东西以每小时一千英里的速度打在我脸上

SMACK. HEY GIRLFRIEND. For the second time in, like, three minutes, I sit up—dazed, confused, hurting. This time, the source of the pain is sitting in my lap: Globlet! "You hit me like a missile made of gum," I say, rubbing my face. "What are you doing here?!"

打。嘿,女朋友。三分钟内，我第二次坐了起来——茫然，困惑，心痛。 这一次，痛苦的源头正坐在我的腿上：Globlet！“你打我就像一枚口香糖做的导弹，”我搓着脸说。 “你在这儿干什么？！”

Oh boy. Where to start first. I was hatched then there were many years of frolicking Then the apocalypse. I got transferred here from another dimension, then some other stuff. And the end. Never mind. I'm just glad to see you. "But," I say, "guess it's not one hundred percent a June Solo Adventure anymore...." "Nope. GIRLS' ADVENTURE!" I grin. Globlet can glow like a night-light and she thinks that everything I do is terrific. Who wouldn't want an uncharted wasteland companion like—

哦男孩。首先从哪里开始。 我被孵化出来，然后有许多年的嬉戏，然后是世界末日。 我从另一个维度被转移到这里，然后是其他东西。 最后。不要紧。我很高兴见到你。 “但是，”我说，“我猜它不再是百分之百的六月独自冒险了....” “不。女孩的冒险!”我咧着嘴笑。 Globlet可以像夜灯一样发光，她认为我做的一切都很棒。 谁不想要一个未知的荒原伴侣呢