Chapter 10

chapter ten Nineteen minutes later, prepare myself warrior friends For this shall be a battle, the likes of which ye have never seen. It is LAST CREATURE STANDING Back in town, I can't contain my excitement! We're throwing a real-life Battle Royale right here in Wakefield! Skaelka yells, "YES! Combat! Finally!"

第十章十九分钟后，做好准备，战士朋友们，因为这将是一场你们从未见过的战斗。 这是最后一个站在镇上的生物，我无法抑制我的兴奋！我们要在韦克菲尔德上演一场真实的大逃杀！Skaelka喊道：“是的！战斗!最后!”

Before I can explain the rules, there's a CLANG. And then another. The sound of real weapons. At the first mention of battle, the monsters are unsheathing interdimensional swords and brushing off monstrous maces! "WAIT! WAIT! HOLD UP!" I shout. "False alarm. Misunderstanding! Last Creatures Standing is a game!" Skaelka's confused. "You mean—no actual death battling?" "Um. No. No death battling," I say. "A little bit?" Skaelka asks. "Nope." "One or two bits?" "Zero bits, Skaelka. Zero bits." Skaelka grumbles. Monsters gripe. Thankfully, June saves the day. "The reason it's not a real battle," June says, "is because that would be too easy for you! This way—it'll be a challenge. A Big Gulp, behemoth-sized challenge." Skaelka's eyes go wide. "Skaelka likes a challenge. Not as much as Skaelka likes death

在我解释规则之前，有一个CLANG。 然后是另一个。真武器的声音。 在第一次提到战斗时，怪物们正在拔出跨次元的剑，刷掉可怕的狼牙棒！“等等!等等!撑起!”我喊。 “假警报。误解!《Last Creatures Standing》是一款游戏！”Skaelka的困惑。 “你是说没有真正的生死搏斗？”“嗯。 否。没有生死搏斗。”我说。 “一点点？”Skaelka问道。 “不。”“一块还是两块？”“零比特，斯卡卡。 零位。”Skaelka抱怨。 怪物抱怨。谢天谢地，琼挽救了局面。 “这不是一场真正的战斗，”琼说，“是因为那对你来说太容易了！这样，这将是一个挑战。 这是一个巨大的挑战。” 斯卡卡睁大了眼睛。“Skaelka喜欢挑战。 斯卡卡更喜欢死亡

battling, but Skaelka will take what Skaelka can get." But some monsters aren't convinced. See, ever since the Monster-Human Olympics, our creature buddies have been crazy competitive. It's not enough to win—they need proof. "What prize does the victor receive?" one monster shouts. "Is it the large intestine of a kromlin, to be worn like a necklace?" one calls out. "Or is it the small intestine of a kromlin, to be worn like a bracelet?" another asks.

战斗，但斯卡卡会得到她能得到的。” 但有些怪物并不相信。 自从怪物-人类奥运会之后，我们的生物伙伴们就开始疯狂竞争了。 光赢是不够的，他们需要证据。 “胜利者会得到什么奖励？”一个怪物喊道。 “这是克林姆林的大肠，像项链一样戴着吗？”一个人喊道。 另一个人问道：“或者它是克林姆林的小肠，像手镯一样戴着？”

We're staring out at a sea of skeptical monster faces. Skaelka runs a finger along her ax and says, "What is this Tremors II that you speak of?" Quint looks at me, shrugs, and I decide to commit to the lie. "Oh," I say. "On Earth, Tremors II is like, um, the ultimate prize. Yeah. Only the most courageous warriors are honored with Tremors II. If you have a copy of Tremors II, you're basically THE ULTIMATE."

我们面对的是一片充满怀疑的怪物面孔的海洋。 Skaelka用手指划过她的斧头，说：“你说的震颤II是什么？”昆特看着我，耸了耸肩，我决定继续说谎。 “哦，”我说。“在地球上，《震颤2》就像是终极大奖。 是的。只有最勇敢的战士才能获得震颤II的荣誉。 如果你拥有《震颤2》的副本，那么你便是终极玩家。”

The monsters huddle up. There's a lot of whispered discussion. And then— THREEMOS II THREEMOS II THREEMOS II ON V.H.S.. They're gonna be so mad when they find out Kevin Bacon isn't even in that one.

怪物们挤成一团。有很多低声的讨论。 然后-三个emos，三个emos，三个emos，三个emos，在V.H.S上。 等他们发现凯文·贝肯都不在那部电影里，肯定会气疯的。