Chapter 8

chapter eight Everybody explodes in exclamations. Dirk starts to fight me on it. June shouts something about how it's madness. Skaelka begins talking about eye-pecking birds again. But I just shake my head until my pals' shoulders slump with grim understanding. I'm the one who can do this, so I'm the one who must do this. My nerves twang like a banjo, but my hand hums in satisfaction. June catches my eye. I nod. And she reluctantly nods back. "I suppose," Quint begins, sounding unsure, "that I could rig something for you to carry up. Once you reach the entrance, you can lower it down for the rest of us." Everyone else is quiet—and I realize they're gonna stay that way until I make clear that I really am OK with this. Even if I'm not.

So let's hop to a gang. Mission operations, sneak inside the fortress and blow it up, thus destroying the schematics before throw can get his bony paws on them. "Your proposed title for this Mission Operation is a tad lengthy," Quint says. "But OK! So... like I said, we'll each have a role to fill. Jack will get us inside..." Dirk perks up. "Ooh! I'm gonna be the Muscle! All silent and sneaky when needed—and then, also, super 'BOOM, FIST TO YOUR FACE, BAD GUY!' Hmm... I'm gonna need some special extra-quiet shoes for this..." "Boom? Did someone say boom?" June asks." 'Cause I call dibs on making stuff go boom. I might not know anything about conjuring or

interdimensional cosmic blow-ups—but you know what I do know about?" She slaps her Blasty hand onto the table. "BLASTING! And I'm pumped to blast that evil place to bits, because that means I'm one step closer to reuniting with my family!" "This is a delightful new side of you, June," I say with a teasing grin. She points her regular, normal, not-Blasty hand at me and grins back. "BOOM." Skaelka cocks her head. "How you four are not yet dead, I do not know," she says, before announcing, "I will be your guide on this perilous journey, navigating you to the heart of that foul fortress." Quint says, "And now that we know how we're getting in, here's how it's all going to go down..."

the plan. I have affix photographs of your faces to these figures. They represent your role in mission operation. Break the fortress. Wait, hold up. Why am I a bar? I'm bringing the boom-not an eyebrow brush. What's with this hamburger guy? Are you applying that? I like hamburgers too much because I don't. I like hamburger's irregu amount. I got Spiderman. I'm happy. That's actually aracknitz ha

Skulker is very pleased with this very realistic insect. You, my dude, has a wad of chewed up bubble gum on him. I think that's supposed to be drooler guys. The figures don't matter. They are simply articulated. Plastic stand-ins for ease of explanation. Of course, it don't matter to you. You gave yourself ObieOne cannobio a mere coincidence. How about you conjure us up some better guys? How about you all be quiet while I tell you how this is going to go down?

We approach the fortress from the south side, then round to the cliff of infinite fatalities. Are we settled on that name? The cliff of infinite fatalities? It doesn't inspire confidence. Jack ascends the cliff and smash. Whoops, let me try that again. Hmm, don't know why it's not sticking. This is also not inspiring confidence.