Chapter 5

chapter five I feel all tingly. Like eating Tropical Skittles while chugging Dr Pepper. A gush of happiness that's so sweet and so refreshing. June eagerly taps Blasty. "So that's it, right? We just blow up the fortress? One big blasteroni with cheese—and then we're done-zo?!" "A little aggressive," Dirk says. "But I like it." "The fortress can only be destroyed from within," Skaelka explains. Quint nods, rubbing his chin. "OK, so, Jack, June —how do we get inside?" June looks at me. I look at her. Our faces tell the same story. Dirk sighs. "You forgot to ask that monster how to get inside, didn't you..." "But I had that question right here!" I exclaim. "On my list. Look!" Questions to ask Splotcher during interrogation... Where's Ghazt?

What does Thrull want from his brain? Who else is in the fortress? How do we get inside? Bonus questions if we have the time... What's the longest you've ever let your toenail get before you clipped it? Do monsters like bowling? You ever try origami, or is that strictly a good guy/neutral fellow thing? "Y'know what," I say, balling up the paper. "June was supposed to ask that one." June scowls, all fake-offended. "No, I wasn't! If I was, I would have asked." "If I was," I say. "I would have asked." "It matters not," Skaelka says, silencing us. Her words are quiet but heavy as she stares into the distance. "As I gaze upon that ghastly place, my

memories return to me one by one. And I now know how to gain entry. I know, because..." I escaped that place. The only way in is the way I got out the north side of the fortress. A sheer cliff. I shudder, knowing Skaelka is staring out at the same place she was tortured. From our vantage point, the cliff is visible—and it's no bunny slope. "It is known as the Cliff of Infinite Fatalities. Two hundred talons tall. Nearly impossible to climb," Skaelka says. "Winds crash like the Pitiless Plains. Razorkaw birds wet their beaks with the blood of any

who attempt the climb. They will peck and pluck your eyeballs." I clear my throat. "But it is possible." The sun is behind us, but Skaelka still squints as she eyes the fortress, like it pains her to look but she knows she has to. It's like watching a scary movie, hands over your eyes, but peeking through your fingers because you still gotta see what happens. "Even if we did manage entry," Skaelka says, "we would need to reach the heart of the fortress. From there, it would take an untold amount of explosive energy to destroy it. There is—" "Fusion!" Quint guesses, then excitedly guesses again, "FISSION!" "No," Skaelka says. She turns to us, her face grim. "There is nothing from this dimension that powerful."