Chapter 10

chapter ten Moonbeams shine through the windows of Hey, Sport —it's not even dawn, but we're all geared up, about ready to go. I wave the Louisville Slicer and gather my Zombie Squad. "Alfred, Lefty, Glurm—you gotta sit this one out," I say as they shamble across the store. "This Wracksaw guy is bad news for monsters... and probably for zombies, too." They groan softly in reply—almost sounding disappointed. But I don't care. All I care is that they're safe. Soon, we're marching through the mall, booming monster snores coming from stores and kiosks—and I've never been more jealous of someone else's sleep time. My heart is doing yoga, and my stomach is working on macramé. I'm tense, tied up in knots, and nervous... very nervous. But at the very least—we look like some buddies who are ready to do a Mission Operation thing. And that fills me with hope.

THE BEST BUDDIES MISSION FORCE! CVRRENT MISSIoN operation. BREAk THE FoRTRESS The guy who gets us inside one perfectly executed heist coming right up. Backpack containing thehuman hamster ball. Carabiners for carabiner. The muscle. I'm the guy who's gonna keep you alive. Shoulder pad, new squeaky quiet slippers. Mission force. Break the fortress. The blow-up specialist. You want it to go? Boom, I'll make it go. Boom, very eager to press the blow up button inside this bag. The fortress breaker. Tactical pants for tactical stuff. The plan, man. Bet you thought I was going to be the conjurer, huh? I contain multitudes and tacos. The man, the myth, the legend, Bug spray. Just in case Streaks of morning light slice through the sky as we step out into camp. A cold wind blows, and I zip up my jacket. The sleeve is tight around my changing arm, keeping it hidden. A voice calls, "Jack Sullivan! My fourth-favorite human!" It's Johnny Steve, flanked by Yursl and Smud. I grin. A goodbye committee.

"Lift me up so I can initiate a good-riddance-high five parade!" Johnny Steve says to Smud. "Think you mean 'good luck'," June says. But Smud's still half asleep, so instead it's Yursl who scoops up Johnny Steve, setting him on her shoulders. It feels like the end of a Little League game, when both teams line up so everybody can slap hands. I guess it's supposed to teach kids about good sportsmanship—but in reality, it's just a chance for the winning team to gloat and the losing team to grumble. And I was always terrible at Little League, so when the game ended, all I really cared about was getting to the promised pizza party. But there's no pizza party waiting for us where we're going now... Good luck. Goodbye. Good luck

goodbye. Good luck. Goodbye. Goodbye As we march across camp, June says, "That was a nice surprise." "Let us hope it is the last surprise today," Skaelka says, hefting her ax over her shoulder. "Nice... or otherwise.— It's nearly midday when we pass beneath our billboard lookout post, and what lies ahead of us sends a shiver down my spine. The fortress has changed...

It looks like Doctor Doom's last place. Volcano Science project Doctor Doom would never come in last place in anything. The fortress tilts at an impossible angle, like it should fall over at any moment—but won't. "We're really going to win," June whispers. I glance over—and her cheeks flush. "Whoops," she says. "I didn't, uh... I didn't mean to say that out loud." But just then, the sun seems to catch the whole world just perfect. And we look... right. We don't look like kids just barely hanging on, trying to

survive. We look like we're supposed to be right here, right now. We're not on our back feet for once. No, this time, we're fighting back. I smile at June. "You can say it out loud. And you can say it again, too, 'cause you're right. We are gonna win." "Hey, chatterboxes, let's keep it movin'!" Dirk calls, huffing ahead of us. Drooler waves to us over Dirk's shoulder. "Double time!" "You heard the Muscle. Time squared," Quint says as we march ahead.— A spooky, otherworldly swamp surrounds the base of the fortress, teeming with oozing fungus and debris. At the water's edge, an oily bubble grows—then pops as we pass. "We circle around the corrosive swamp. Beyond it lies a path to the solid soil beneath the cliff," Skaelka announces, carefully treading forward. "Yeah," I start. "We'll definitely wanna avoid the corrosive—" I shut up. Out of the corner of my eye, something moves. A patch of glowing algae on the swamp's surface is suddenly sucked under. And then—