Chapter 15

chapter fifteen At the end of the school's long side hallway is a metal door. I hold my breath and push on the safety handle. It's nearly pitch black outside. My eyes adjust, and in the moonlight, I see zombies. Zombies everywhere. And Blarg, across the street, staring vacantly into the night. "Okay, crew," I whisper. "Stay quiet. AND NO LIGHT!" "What light would there be?!" Dirk asks. "I dunno—if you're carrying a lightsaber, don't whip it out all of a sudden. Just no light. OK?" They all nod. "I really wish we had a secret handshake or something right now," I say. "Jack, give up on the secret handshake," Quint says. "There are no secret handshakes." "There will be!" I say. "Once we get home alive.

Now—ready?" We all look at each other. Thinking about what we're about to do. Nervous. Terrified, right down to the bone. But in this together. We all nod our heads yes, then I step out the door. We move very stealthy. Very stealthy, for about seven feet. Seven feet of super Sam-Fisher-Splinter-Cell-style stealthiness before the zombies catch scent of our human stink. The undead monsters moan and roar and open their arms, waiting to greet us with their decaying fingers and sink their teeth into our skin and just straight-up peel the flesh from our bones!

Enough tiptoeing. Time to put a hurt on these undead uylies! Suddenly, all around me, it's freaking crazy zombie-battling action! Fists fly! Bones crunch! Dirk is throwing haymakers. POW! One hard uppercut to a zombie chin.

June swings her broom-handle spear. KRAK! It slams against zombie skull. Then she whirls, swinging low, sweeping four undeaders off their feet. SMASH! Quint cracks one of his glass tubes against an undead head. He's blinding them with

science! We continue forward, battling, fighting, forcing our way to Big Mama. We're getting close, just one final push! Good job, guys. Good effort. Dirk yanks open the door to Big Mama, and then the worst possible thing that could happen—well, it happens.

Big Mama's headlights flash on. The high beams. They cut across the grass, slicing through the darkness. I follow their path. They're shining directly onto Blarg. His eyes flash and he opens his fanged mouth and he lets out a tremendous "BLARGGGGG!!!!!!" "Jack!" Quint shrieks. "You left the high beams on?!?!?!" He turns them off fast. "Whoops. Look, I said I was a good driver. I never said I was a good dashboard-controller guy." BLARGGGGG!1!!!" Blarg takes a dozen heavy, Earth-quaking steps, and in moments he's towering over Big Mama. His next step shakes the ground and sends us all tumbling back onto our butts. I'm sprawled out, staring up at the fiend. And that's when I see it. Right in front of my eyes: my sneakers. And it hits me! A backup plan! Heroes GOTTA have backup plans! I reach down and—RIP!—yank off the tape