7 Return of an Old Friend

Chapter 7 RETURN OF AN OLD FRIEND Their tummies filled, the McDonald family was on the road again. In fact, Dr. McDonald began to sing, much to everyone's dismay, Willie Nelson's signature song "On the Road Again." As a singer, Dr. McDonald made a good history professor. The twins stared out the window as Arkansas rolled by. They were both thinking the same thing—what if Bones and Mya were wrong? What if the coast wasn't clear? What if Mrs. Higgins or those pesky bowler dudes were waiting for them at their next stop, ready to leap out and do some horribly unspeakable thing? Or what if there was a new threat out there waiting to attack them? Coke made a mental note to never let down

第七章老朋友的归来他们吃饱了肚子，麦当劳一家又上路了。 事实上，麦克唐纳医生开始唱威利·纳尔逊的标志性歌曲《再次上路》，这让所有人都很沮丧。 作为一名歌手，麦克唐纳博士是一名优秀的历史教授。 当阿肯色从旁边驶过时，双胞胎凝视着窗外。 他们都在想同样的事情——如果骨头和米亚错了怎么办？ 如果海岸不安全怎么办？ 如果希金斯太太或者那些讨厌的打保龄球的家伙在下一站等着他们，准备跳出来做一些可怕的不可言说的事情呢？ 或者如果有新的威胁在等着攻击他们呢？ 可口可乐在心里记着永远不要让人失望

his guard. On the first half of their journey, most of the highway signs had an E, for east, after the route number. Now the highway signs ended in a W. The McDonalds were on their way home. "Hot Springs, here we come!" Dr. McDonald bellowed as he merged onto I-30 West out of Little Rock. Mrs. McDonald opened her Arkansas guidebook and casually leafed through it. They had only traveled about fourteen miles when they approached exit 123— Bryant/Bauxite. "Ben, stop the car!" Mrs. McDonald shouted suddenly. He swerved off to the shoulder of the road and slammed on the brakes, nearly causing an accident and frightening the other drivers. The Ferrari screeched to a halt. Books, maps, papers, pens, and anything else that wasn't held down went flying into the front seat. Had they not been wearing seat belts, the whole family would have gone through the windshield.

他的警卫。在他们的前半段旅程中，大多数高速公路的标志都在路线号码后面加上一个E，代表东。 现在公路标志以W结尾。 麦当劳一家正在回家的路上。 “温泉，我们来了！”博士。 麦克唐纳咆哮着从小石城驶上I-30西公路。 麦克唐纳太太打开她的阿肯色旅行指南，漫不经心地翻了翻。 他们只走了大约14英里，就来到了123号出口布莱恩特/铝土矿。 “本，停车！”麦克唐纳太太突然喊道。 他突然转向路肩，猛踩刹车，差点造成事故，吓坏了其他司机。 法拉利嘎吱一声停了下来。 书、地图、纸、笔和其他任何没按住的东西都飞到了前座上。 如果他们没有系安全带，整个家庭都会从挡风玻璃上撞过去。

"What's wrong?" Dr. McDonald asked, his heart racing. "Did I hit something?" "This is the exit for Bauxite, Arkansas!" Mrs. McDonald said excitedly. "So?" replied the rest of the family. "The town is named after bauxite!" A moment of silence. "What's bauxite?" asked Pep. "It's an off-white, grayish, brown, yellow, or reddish-brown rock," Coke informed her. "They make aluminum out of it." He remembered that from a game of Trivial Pursuit he had played years ago. "Thank you, Mr. Wikipedia," Pep said, rolling her eyes. "Don't tell me, let me guess," Dr. McDonald said. "There's a museum here—" "Yes!" Mrs. McDonald said gleefully. "Bauxite, Arkansas, calls itself the Aluminum Capital of the World! This will be great for Amazing but True. And the town is just a few miles from here!"

“怎么了?”麦克唐纳医生问，他的心跳加速。 “我撞到什么东西了吗？”“这是阿肯色州铝土矿公司的出口！”麦克唐纳太太兴奋地说。 “那又怎样？”家里的其他人回答。 “这个小镇是以铝土矿命名的！”默哀片刻。 “什么是铝土矿？”佩普问。 “这是一种灰白色、灰色、棕色、黄色或红褐色的岩石，”科克告诉她。 “他们用它制造铝。” 他想起了几年前玩的一次“琐碎追逐逐题”游戏。 “谢谢你，维基百科先生。”佩普翻着白眼说。 “别告诉我，让我猜猜看。” 麦克唐纳说。“这儿有个博物馆——”“对！”麦克唐纳太太高兴地说。 “阿肯色州的铝土矿自称是世界铝之都！”这将是伟大的神奇但真实。 镇子离这儿只有几英里远！”

A collective groan could be heard from inside the Ferrari. "You know, Mom," Pep said, choosing her words carefully, "there's no rule that says we have to go to every capital of the world." "That's right, Mom," Coke pointed out. "Maybe we ought to skip this one. It doesn't sound that interesting." Dr. McDonald kept his mouth shut. He'd decided to let the kids take the heat this time. Mrs. McDonald turned to face the backseat. Never a good sign. "Sixty years from now, you're going to be old," she told the kids. "You're going to think back on all the things you did during your life. You'll have some regrets. We all do. And if we don't visit Bauxite, Arkansas, right now, you're going to regret that you were just a few lousy miles from the Aluminum Capital of the World and couldn't be bothered to check it out. How will you feel?" In their heads, Coke and Pep came up with

从法拉利车里可以听到集体的呻吟声。 “你知道，妈妈，”佩普小心翼翼地说，“没有规定说我们必须去世界上的每个首都。” “没错，妈妈，”科克指出。 “也许我们应该跳过这个。 听起来没什么意思。” 麦克唐纳医生保持沉默。 他决定这次让孩子们承担责任。 麦克唐纳太太转过身来面对后座。 这可不是什么好兆头。“六十年后，你们会变老，”她对孩子们说。 “你会回想你一生中做过的所有事情。 你会后悔的。我们都是这样。 如果我们现在不去阿肯色州的铝土矿，你会后悔你离世界铝业之都只有几英里远，却没来得及去看看。 你会有什么感觉？”在他们的脑海里，可口可乐和佩普想出了

several snarky comments, along the lines of "We'll feel great!" In reality, they didn't say a word. There was no use arguing with Bridget McDonald. There was no use complaining. They would be going to Bauxite, Arkansas—the Aluminum Capital of the World. Dr. McDonald grudgingly pulled off at the exit. "I hope this place is more interesting than the Duct Tape Capital of the World," Coke whispered to his sister in the backseat. Perhaps you recall, dear reader, that a similar situation occurred in The Genius Files: Never Say Genius. On their way to the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame, the McDonalds stumbled upon the town of Avon, Ohio, where there is an annual duct tape parade, with duct tape sculptures, a duct tape fashion show, and a dancing mascot called Duct Tape Duck. Bauxite looked pretty much like any other small town in America. A sign said the population of the town was 432.

一些尖刻的评论，比如“我们会感觉很好！”实际上，他们什么也没说。 和布里吉特·麦克唐纳争论是没有用的。 抱怨是没有用的。 他们要去阿肯色州的铝土矿——世界铝业之都。 麦克唐纳医生不情愿地把车停在出口处。 “我希望这个地方比世界胶带之都更有趣，”科克在后座上对妹妹耳语道。 亲爱的读者，也许你还记得，在《天才档案：永不说天才》中也发生过类似的情况。 在去摇滚名人堂的路上，麦当劳一家偶然发现了俄亥俄州的埃文镇，那里有一年一度的管道胶带游行，有管道胶带雕塑，管道胶带时装秀，还有一个跳舞的吉祥物，叫做管道胶带鸭子。 铝土矿看起来和美国其他小镇没什么两样。 牌子上写着这个镇的人口是432人。

"They should call this place Snoozeville, USA," Coke grumbled as he looked out the window. "The Aluminum Capital of the World?" Pep asked. "It's not like the houses here are made out of aluminum or anything." Dr. McDonald drove past the local post office and turned south on School Street. After a few blocks, he double-parked in front of the Bauxite Museum—a colonial-style building with five columns in the front. "You kids run inside and get tickets," said Mrs. McDonald. "We'll find a parking spot."

“他们应该把这个地方叫做美国的斯诺兹维尔，”可口可乐看着窗外抱怨道。 “世界铝之都？”Pep问道。 “这里的房子又不是用铝或其他什么东西做的。” 麦克唐纳医生开车经过当地的邮局，在学校街向南拐去。 过了几个街区后，他把车停在了铝土矿博物馆（铝土矿博物馆是一座殖民地风格的建筑，前面有五根柱子）前面。 “你们这些孩子快进去买票，”麦克唐纳太太说。 “我们会找到一个停车位的。”