5 The Dividing Line

Chapter 5 THE DIVIDING LINE At this point, you may be starting to wonder when Coke is going to be shoved into a spinning clothes dryer. Please! Have a little patience. Our story is just beginning, and the journey has not even begun. Stick with it, dear reader, and your unhealthy thirst for blood, gore, and tragedy will be satisfied. By the way, if you'd like to follow the McDonalds on their trip back home to California, it's easy. Get on the internet and go to Google Maps (http://maps.google.com), MapQuest (www.mapquest.com), Rand McNally (www.randmcnally.com), or whatever

navigation website you like best. Go ahead, I'll wait. Okay, now type in 3717 Elvis Presley Boulevard, Memphis TN and click SEARCH MAPS. Click the little + or -sign on the screen to zoom in or out until you get a sense of where the twins are. Did you find Graceland? That's our starting point. Now click Get Directions. In the A box, type Graceland, Memphis TN. In the B box, type Little Rock AR. Then click Get Directions.

Dr. McDonald made a left turn onto Elvis Presley Boulevard heading north and accelerated smoothly to merge onto I-55. He enjoyed the admiring glances he was getting from the drivers in the cars as he passed them. Especially the young female drivers. "Keep your eyes on the road, Ben," advised Mrs. McDonald. "This car totally kicks butt, Dad!" Coke said. "Stick with me, pal," his father replied, pushing the gas pedal just a little farther than necessary to impress the family and feel the

vrooooom of the Ferrari as it nosed over the speed limit. Soon they were on I-40 and the ramp of the Hernando De Soto Bridge, with a large body of water in front of them. "Feast your eyes, y'all," Dr. McDonald announced in a ridiculously exaggerated fake Southern accent. "Yonder lies the mighty Mississippi. The largest river system in North America. Gateway to the West. Home to Huck Finn, Lewis and Clark—" "We get it, Dad." "Ol' man river," Dr. McDonald began to sing, "dat old man river..." "Please, Dad, not that," advised Coke, with

an eye roll to the left. "Mississippi Queeeeeeeeeen!" belted Dr. McDonald. "If you know what I mean..." "Please stop singing, Dad," advised Pep, with an eye roll to the right. "Do you kids know anything about the Mississippi River?" asked Mrs. McDonald. She, of course, knew that her son had a photographic memory and recalled just about everything he had ever seen, read, heard, smelled, or tasted. "The name Mississippi comes from the Ojibwe Indians," Coke informed the others. "They called the river Misi-zibi, which means 'Father of Waters.'" "Here we go again," Pep muttered, clearly annoyed. It's not easy living with somebody who has total recall, and especially when he's your twin brother. Pep's teachers always seemed a little disappointed that she didn't have her brother's incredible ability to remember information. Coke had read about the Ojibwe Indians on

the back of a cereal box five years earlier, and couldn't resist sharing the information. "You probably know that a raindrop falling into Lake Itasca in Minnesota will travel the length of the Mississippi and arrive at the Gulf of Mexico about ninety days later," he said. Now he was just showing off. "Thank you, Mr. Boring!" Pep muttered, unable to restrain herself. "You probably just made that up." There was still a long way to go before the McDonald family would be home, but the Mississippi River seemed like a sort of symbolic dividing line between east and west. Pep turned around to glance out the back window and see the Memphis skyline getting smaller in the distance. They were finally on their way back to California. Like the Memphis skyline, their troubles seemed to be fading from view. As soon as they crossed the Hernando De Soto Bridge, this sign appeared at the side of the highway: