27 Majority Rules

Chapter 27 MAJORITY RULES When Dr. and Mrs. McDonald got back to the hotel later that night, they were in a much better frame of mind. They even brought back a souvenir—a KEEP AUSTIN WEIRD refrigerator magnet. But Coke and Pep were asleep. Escaping from a swarm of bats does tend to sap your energy. In the morning, the family set out for San Antonio, which is eighty miles south of Austin on I-35. The angry feelings of the night before were gone, or at least pushed below the surface for the time being. "What's in San Antonio?" Pep asked, not sure she wanted to know the answer. "The Alamo, of course," her father replied. "Isn't that a rental car place?" Coke asked.

"Why would we want to go there?" Coke knew what the Alamo was. He just felt like giving his dad a hard time. "The Alamo is not a rental car place!" his exasperated father replied. "It's an eighteenth- century mission church where the pivotal battle in the fight for the independence of Texas took place. Don't they teach you kids anything in school?" "Texas is independent?" Pep asked. Mrs. McDonald laughed. The Ferrari almost drove off the road. "Look," Dr. McDonald said, "in the early 1800s, Texas belonged to Mexico. The Texans fought a war for independence in 1836. There was a thirteen-day siege, and a few hundred Texans were badly outnumbered at the Alamo. Finally, fifteen hundred Mexican troops launched an assault and wiped them out. Guys like James Bowie, Davy Crockett, and William Travis died. And ever since that day, the Alamo has symbolized courage and sacrifice for the

cause of liberty. You've heard the phrase 'Remember the Alamo.' That was Sam Houston's battle cry when he defeated General Santa Anna a few weeks later. Texas became an independent republic and then joined the United States as the twenty-eighth state. Won't it be interesting to go to the Alamo and see where this all happened?" "I guess," the twins mumbled, which, translated into the language of Teenager, means "No." "Everybody goes to the Alamo, Ben," Mrs. McDonald said. "Do you want to be just another sheep following the herd?" Dr. McDonald was getting progressively more steamed. Now he had to take guff from his wife too. "Everybody goes to the Alamo because it's an important part of American history! It's a part of our democracy we all should know," he said, a little too loud. "Actually," Mrs. McDonald said, "there's

another place I'd like to go that's right near San Antonio." "Where?" "You're just going to laugh." "We won't laugh, Mom," promised Pep. "The Toilet Seat Art Museum," she said. Everybody laughed. "That's a joke, right, Bridge?" asked Dr. McDonald. "No, it's not." "You gotta be kidding me," Coke said. "There's a museum devoted to toilet seats?" "It's not devoted to toilet seats," Mrs. McDonald replied. "It's devoted to toilet seat art." Dr. McDonald had just about reached his limit. "Another tourist trap?" he said. "Bridge, just because some guy collected a bunch of junk in his garage and calls it a museum doesn't mean we have to go look at it." "Oh, come on, Ben," Mrs. McDonald said. "It

will be great for Amazing but True." "How about we take a vote on it?" Coke suggested. "That's the way democracy works, right? What do you vote for, Dad, the Alamo or the toilet seat place?" "The Alamo." "How about you, Mom?" "The toilet seat art museum." "What about you, Pep?" "The toilet seat art museum." "I vote for the toilet museum too," Coke said. "That's three to one. Majority rules. Woohoo! We're going to look at toilet seats! Isn't democracy wonderful?" Pep peeked at her father's face in the rearview mirror. It looked like he might have a seizure. "Why can't we go to both places?" Pep suggested. "We can spend the morning at the toilet seat art museum and the afternoon at the Alamo. Everybody will be happy. Democracy is all about compromises, right?"

Dr. McDonald abruptly swerved the car and pulled off onto the shoulder of the highway. He took off his seat belt so he could turn around to address the whole family. "Look," he said, trying his best to remain calm. "I went along with the yo-yo museum and the Spam museum. I went to the mustard museum and the Waffle House museum. I even went with you to that stupid washing machine museum. But life is short. I'm not going to waste half a day looking at toilet seats. And that's final!" "So much for your compromises," Coke mumbled to his sister. "How about this idea, Dad?" Pep suggested. "You drop the three of us off at the toilet seat art museum and then you can go visit the Alamo on your own. We can meet up later." Dr. McDonald thought it over. Part of him didn't like Pep's idea. They were a family. The whole idea of driving cross-country was to explore America together. If they were to split