11 Happy Birthday, Mrs. McDonald!

Chapter 11 HAPPY BIRTHDAY, MRS. MCDONALD! So the coast was truly clear. The bowler dudes weren't going to hurt them. Mrs. Higgins wasn't going to hurt them. Dr. Warsaw wasn't going to hurt them. "This is the best vacation I ever had," Coke told his parents enthusiastically. "I just wanted to let you guys know that I'm having a wonderful time." "Me too," Pep added brightly. "Driving cross- country is so much more of an enriching experience than going to some dumb theme park." In the front seat, the parents looked at each other suspiciously. Something had to be up. Neither of them could remember the last time

第十一章生日快乐，夫人。 麦当劳!所以情况确实很好。 那些打保龄球的家伙不会伤害他们的。 希金斯夫人不会伤害他们的。 华沙医生不会伤害他们的。 “这是我度过的最好的假期，”可口可乐热情地告诉他的父母。 “我只是想让你们知道我玩得很开心。” “我也是，”佩普高兴地补充道。 “开车横穿全国比去一些愚蠢的主题公园要丰富得多。” 在前排座位上，父母狐疑地面面相觑。 一定发生了什么事。他们两人都不记得上次是什么时候了

the twins were so cheery and cooperative. After a fantastic dinner at Western Sizzlin in Poteau, the McDonalds pulled into the parking lot at the Holiday Inn Express. "How is this place any different from a regular Holiday Inn?" Pep asked as her parents checked in at the front desk. "Maybe you sleep faster here," Coke cracked. When they got to their room, Pep was careful to hide the birthday present she had gotten for her mother, a box of soothing bath salts she had picked up back in Hot Springs, Arkansas. Coke, who remembered just about every other thing he had ever experienced, never remembered anybody's birthday. Pep knew her present would have to be from the two of them. "Only a few more hours until the big day, Bridge," said Dr. McDonald as he unpacked his suitcase. "Tomorrow, you're in charge. We do whatever you want to do. You can boss us around all you want."

那对双胞胎很高兴，也很合作。 在波多的Western Sizzlin餐厅享用了一顿丰盛的晚餐后，他们把车停在了假日快捷酒店的停车场。 “这个地方和普通的假日酒店有什么不同？”佩普问，她的父母在前台办理入住手续。 “也许你在这里睡得更快，”可口可乐说。 当他们回到自己的房间时，佩普小心翼翼地把她给母亲买的生日礼物藏了起来，那是她从阿肯色州温泉城买来的一盒舒缓浴盐。 可口可乐对自己经历过的每一件事几乎都记得清清楚楚，却从不记得任何人的生日。 佩普知道她的礼物必须是他们俩送的。 “离大日子只有几个小时了，布里奇。” 麦克唐纳一边打开手提箱一边说。 “明天，你说了算。 你想干什么我们就干什么。 你可以对我们颐指气使。”

"Really?" "Sure," said Dr. McDonald. "Do you want to go out to a fancy restaurant for dinner? Fine. You want to sit around the hotel pool all day? That's okay too. Whatever your heart desires, honey." Mrs. McDonald thought it over. The money she made from Amazing but True was paying for the trip, and she pretty much decided what they would do every day. But she was always conscious of the rest of the family's boredom level, and tried not to drag them to places that wouldn't interest them. But it was her birthday. All bets were off. This was going to be her day. She decided to make the most of it. "I can do anything I want?" she asked. "Anything," said Dr. McDonald. "Okay," Mrs. McDonald said. "Everybody needs to be ready to get on the road at seven o'clock." "Where are we going, Mom?" Pep asked.

“真的吗?”“当然可以。” 麦当劳。“你想去一家高级餐厅吃饭吗？” 很好。你想整天坐在酒店泳池边吗？ 这也没关系。随心所欲，亲爱的。” 麦克唐纳太太想了想。 她从《神奇但真实》赚的钱是旅行的费用，她几乎决定了他们每天要做什么。 但她总是意识到家里其他人的无聊程度，尽量不把他们拖到他们不感兴趣的地方。 但那天是她的生日。所有的赌注都被取消了。 今天是她的好日子。 她决定充分利用这个机会。 “我可以做任何我想做的事？”她问。 “什么都可以，”麦克唐纳医生说。 “好吧，”麦克唐纳太太说。 “每个人都要做好七点钟上路的准备。” “我们要去哪儿，妈妈？”Pep问道。

"You'll see." While the others slept, Mrs. McDonald spent the next two hours with a guidebook, a map of Oklahoma, and her laptop computer. In the morning, after the presents, singing "Happy Birthday," and a quick continental breakfast, they piled into the car and drove a very fast eighty miles north to Tahlequah, Oklahoma. Usually, Mrs. McDonald was telling her husband to slow down and observe all the speed limit signs. Not today. "Faster, Ben!" Mrs. McDonald kept urging. "You drive like a glacier!" "I'm doing seventy miles an hour," Dr. McDonald complained. "If I go any faster, we're gonna get pulled over." "Why did you buy a Ferrari if you didn't want to drive fast?" she replied. "What's your rush?" asked Dr. McDonald. "We've got all day." "Floor it, Dad!" Coke hollered from the

“你会看到的。”当其他人都在睡觉的时候，麦克唐纳太太在接下来的两个小时里拿着一本旅游指南、一张俄克拉何马州的地图和她的笔记本电脑。 第二天早上，他们送完礼物，唱着《生日快乐》，匆匆吃过一顿欧陆式早餐，就挤进汽车，飞快地向北开了八十英里，来到俄克拉何马州的塔勒库。 通常，麦克唐纳太太会告诉她的丈夫放慢速度，并遵守所有的限速标志。 不是今天。“快,本!”麦克唐纳太太一直在催促。 “你开车像冰川一样！”“我的车速是每小时70英里。” 麦当劳抱怨道。“如果我再开快一点，我们就会被停车。” “如果你不想开得快，为什么要买法拉利呢？”她回答。 “你急什么呢？” 麦当劳。“我们有一整天的时间。” “踩油门，爸爸！”可乐从房间里喊道

backseat. It only took an hour and a half to reach Tahlequah, in the foothills of the Ozark Mountains. Just outside town, Mrs. McDonald directed them to a little ranch house, which appeared to be abandoned. Dr. McDonald parked across the road and they walked around back, where there was a metal shed. "This place is creepy," Pep said. On the ground to the left of the shed was a large tombstone. It looked like it had once been standing up, but somebody knocked it over. This is what it said on the tombstone. Mister ED "Who's Mister Ed?" Coke asked. "You never heard of Mister Ed?" his mother replied. When the twins shook their heads no, both parents spontaneously broke into a silly song that began with the words "A horse is a horse, of course, of course.

后座。他们只花了一个半小时就到达了奥扎克山脚下的塔勒库厄。 就在镇外，麦克唐纳太太把他们领到一所牧场小屋，那似乎是被遗弃的。 麦克唐纳医生把车停在马路对面，他们绕到后面，那里有一个金属棚子。 “这地方真令人毛骨悚然，”佩普说。 棚子左边的地上有一块很大的墓碑。 它看起来曾经是站着的，但是有人把它打翻了。 墓碑上是这么写的。 “艾德先生是谁？”可口可乐问道。 “你从来没听说过埃德先生吗？” 当双胞胎摇头表示不同意时，父母双方不由自主地唱起了一首愚蠢的歌，开头是这样的：“马就是马，当然，当然。”

Once again, I wish I could give you all the lyrics, but financial considerations as well as personal laziness prevent that from happening. Instead, go to YouTube and search for "Mister Ed theme song." Go ahead, we'll wait for you here. "Mister Ed was my favorite show when I was a kid," said Dr. McDonald. "They made a TV show about a talking horse?" Coke asked. "Well, he only talked to Wilbur, his owner," explained Dr. McDonald. "Sometimes he talked on the phone too," Mrs. McDonald added. "I heard they made him talk by putting a nylon thread in his mouth and pulling on it." The tombstone had an etching of Mister Ed poking his head through a barn door. Mrs. McDonald took some photos and explained that Mister Ed's original name was Bamboo Harvester. "So, there's a horse buried under here?"

再一次，我希望我能给你所有的歌词，但经济上的考虑以及个人的懒惰阻止了这一切的发生。 不如去YouTube上搜索“艾德先生的主题曲”。 去吧，我们在这里等你。 “当我还是个孩子的时候，艾德先生是我最喜欢的节目。” 麦当劳。“他们制作了一个关于会说话的马的电视节目？”可口可乐问道。 “嗯，它只和它的主人威尔伯说话。” 麦当劳。“有时他也会打电话，”麦克唐纳太太补充说。 “我听说他们把一根尼龙线塞进他嘴里，然后拉它，让他说话。” 墓碑上蚀刻着艾德先生把头伸进谷仓门的图案。 麦克唐纳夫人拍了一些照片，并解释说，埃德先生原来的名字是竹林收割机。 “这么说，这下面埋着一匹马？”