18 SPAM, SPAM, SPAM, SPAM

Chapter 18 SPAM SPAM SPAM SPAM As they headed north on Route 81, Dr. McDonald was fuming. He was so angry, he couldn't speak. He did not want to go see another ball of twine. In cartoons, animators typically have smoke pouring out of characters' ears to signal they're really mad. There might as well have been smoke pouring out of Dr. McDonald's ears. Go to Google Maps (http://maps.google.com/). Click Get Directions. In the A box, type Cawker City KS. In the B box, type Lincoln NE. Click Get Directions.

当他们沿着81号公路向北行驶时。 麦克唐纳勃然大怒。他气得说不出话来。 他不想再去看一团线了。 在动画片中，动画师通常会让烟从角色的耳朵里冒出来，表示他们真的很生气。 就好像是有烟从Dr。 麦当劳的耳朵。进入谷歌Maps （http://maps.google.com/）。 点击“获取路线”。在A框中，输入考克城KS。 在B框中，输入Lincoln NE。 点击“获取路线”。

But he was a devoted husband and father, too. Sometimes it seemed as though he loved his family even more than he loved himself. And if his family wanted him to drive hours out of his way to Minnesota to see another @#$%^&* ball of twine, he decided, then, @#$%^&*, he would drive them there. That's the kind of a man he was. Please excuse the language. This is just what was going through Dr. McDonald's mind. He was so angry, in fact, that he had forgotten that the contents of the RV's holding tank had not been emptied since the family left California. It was nearly filled to the top now. It crossed Coke's mind a few times that he should do a dump, but he never did anything about it. The thought of dropping four days' worth of human waste through a tube into a hole in the ground was not Coke's idea of a fun morning. He figured that when the time came that they really needed to do a dump, his father would let him know.

但他也是一个忠诚的丈夫和父亲。 有时，他似乎爱他的家庭胜过爱他自己。 如果他的家人想让他开车几个小时去明尼苏达州看另一个“#$%^&*绳球”，他决定，然后，@#$%^&*，他会开车送他们去那里。 他就是这样的人。 请原谅我的语言。 这就是我所经历的。 麦当劳的想法。事实上，他是如此生气，以至于忘记了自从全家离开加州以来，房车的储物箱里的东西还没有倒过一次。 现在它几乎满了。 可口可乐有几次想到他应该去大便，但他从来没有做过任何事情。 在可口可乐公司看来，把四天的人类排泄物通过一根管子倒进一个洞里，可不是一个有趣的早晨。 他想，当他们真的需要上厕所的时候，他父亲会让他知道的。

But Dr. McDonald wasn't talking. He didn't say a word to anybody for three hours. The sun was getting low in the sky, so as soon as he saw an RV CAMPING sign outside of Lincoln, Nebraska, he pulled off the highway. And after a good night's sleep, at least some of his anger had subsided. Driving up through Minnesota could be fun, he tried to convince himself as they got back on I-80 toward Omaha. He'd never been to Minnesota, he reasoned. It was always good to try new things. Go to Google Maps (http://maps.google.com/). Click Get Directions. In the A box, type Omaha NE. In the B box, type Darwin MN. Click Get Directions. Minnesota was supposed to be beautiful in the summer, he said silently. Spontaneity makes for the best vacation memories, he decided.

但麦克唐纳医生没有说话。 他有三个小时没跟任何人说一句话。 太阳快要下山了，所以当他在内布拉斯加州林肯市外看到一个房车露营的标志时，他把车停在了高速公路上。 睡了一个好觉之后，至少他的愤怒平息了一些。 开车穿过明尼苏达州可能会很有趣，他试图说服自己，当他们回到I-80向奥马哈。 他解释说，他从未去过明尼苏达州。 尝试新事物总是好的。 进入谷歌Maps （http://maps.google.com/）。 点击“获取路线”。在A框里，输入东北奥马哈。 在B框中，输入Darwin MN。 点击“获取路线”。明尼苏达的夏天应该很美，他默默地说。 他决定，自发性是最好的假期回忆。

It might even be fun to see another giant ball of twine, he thought. But deep down inside, he didn't believe a word of it. It's 440 miles from Omaha, Nebraska, to Darwin, Minnesota. Seven hours and twenty- five minutes of driving, if you don't stop. That's a lot of driving. The RV was filled with tension. As they passed Omaha and crossed over into Iowa, Coke didn't even announce any useless information about the state. Mrs. McDonald pulled out an Iowa guidebook and began to leaf through it. "Y'know, there's a forty-five ton concrete bull in Audubon," she said quietly. "It's the largest bull in the world. We should go see it. It's not far out of the way. Its name is Albert." "No!" Coke and Pep shouted from the back.

他想，如果再看到一个巨大的麻线球，也许会很有趣。 但在内心深处，他一个字也不相信。 从内布拉斯加州的奥马哈到明尼苏达州的达尔文有440英里。 如果你不停车的话，要开7小时25分钟的车。 那要开很多路。房车里充满了紧张气氛。 当他们穿过奥马哈进入爱荷华州时，可口可乐甚至没有公布任何有关该州的无用信息。 麦克唐纳太太拿出一本爱荷华州旅游指南，开始翻阅。 “你知道，奥杜邦有一头45吨重的混凝土公牛，”她平静地说。 “这是世界上最大的公牛。 我们应该去看看。它离路不远。 它的名字叫艾伯特。”“不!”可乐和佩普在后面喊道。

"We want to get to the other ball of twine!" "There's a ten-foot ear of corn in Coon Rapids," Mrs. McDonald announced a few minutes later. "And it rotates." "No!" the kids barked. "We want to see the other ball of twine!" "How about the Buddy Holly Monument in Clear Lake?" Mrs. McDonald suggested gently. "Buddy Holly sang 'Peggy Sue,' 'It's So Easy,' 'Rave On'..." In the front seat, the grown-ups broke into an off-key version of "That'll Be the Day." "No!" yelled the kids. "We want to see the other ball of twine!" "How about the Hobo Museum?" Mrs. McDonald persisted. "It says here that while many people think of hobos as drunks and criminals, the Hobo Museum celebrates them as dignified men who preferred a relaxed lifestyle on the road without the pressures of owning homes and acquiring material possessions." "I think I would like the life of a hobo," Dr.

“我们要去另一个线球！”“库恩·拉皮兹有一棵10英尺高的玉米穗，”几分钟后麦克唐纳太太宣布。 “它会旋转。”“不！”孩子们叫道。 “我们想看看另一个线球！”“去清澈湖的巴迪·霍利纪念碑怎么样？”麦克唐纳太太温和地建议道。 “Buddy Holly唱了《Peggy Sue》、《It's So Easy》、《Rave On》……” 在前排座位上，大人们唱起了跑调版的《That’ll Be the Day》。 “不！”孩子们喊道。“我们想看看另一个线球！”“去流浪汉博物馆怎么样？”麦克唐纳太太坚持说。 “这里说，虽然许多人认为流浪汉是酒鬼和罪犯，但流浪汉博物馆认为他们是有尊严的人，他们喜欢在路上过轻松的生活方式，没有拥有房屋和获得物质财富的压力。” “我想我宁愿过流浪汉的生活。”

McDonald said. "No schedules or deadlines. No mortgage or phone bills. No office. You can dress the way you want, go where you want, and sleep when you want. And you get to see the world. Maybe I should become a hobo." "How would we put the kids through college, dear?" asked Mrs. McDonald. "Who needs college?" he replied. "The kids could become hobos too." "No!" came shouts from the backseat. "Ball of twine!" Mrs. McDonald continued to leaf through the guidebook but stopped suggesting interesting places to stop. Dr. McDonald pulled off I-80 East at Des Moines and merged onto Interstate 35, which goes north-south and cuts Iowa almost perfectly in half. It seemed as if they had been driving forever. Heading north, it was another two hours before they crossed the state line.

麦克唐纳说。“没有时间表或最后期限。 没有抵押贷款或电话账单。 没有办公室。你可以穿你想穿的衣服，去你想去的地方，想睡就睡。 你可以去看世界。 也许我应该成为一个流浪汉。” “亲爱的，我们怎么供孩子们念完大学呢？”麦克唐纳太太问。 “谁需要上大学？”他回答。 “孩子们也可能成为流浪汉。” “不！”从后座传来喊声。 “麻线团！”麦克唐纳太太继续翻着旅游指南，但不再推荐有趣的地方。 麦克唐纳博士在得梅因（Des Moines）驶离80号州际公路东段，并上了35号州际公路，这条公路向南延伸，将爱荷华州几乎完全一分为二。 他们似乎永远都在开车。 他们向北行驶，又过了两个小时才越过州界。