16 Things Start to Go Wrong Already

16. THINGS START TO GO WRONG ALREADY– YOU SEE, THAT DIDN'T LAST LONG, ONLY ONE CHAPTER Things had already started to go wrong, unbeknownst to Hiccup. He should not have locked that witch in the cupboard. Hiccup was young, you see, and prone to mistakes. When he was an older, more experienced Hero, he would never have done that. He would have put the witch

16. 事情已经开始变坏了——你看，这并没有持续多久，只有一章事情已经开始变坏了，小嗝嗝却不知道。 他不应该把那个女巫锁在柜子里。 你知道，小嗝嗝还年轻，容易犯错。 当他是一个更年长、更有经验的英雄时，他绝不会这么做。 他会把女巫

back in the cauldron instead (where she started, so that would have been poetic), and wound her down the well again and thrown the rope after her. If he had done that, then all would have been well (excuse the pun). Because even witches cannot get out of wells, for they have no wings. But the most amateur of witches can get out of a cupboard, even when they have no key, and the cupboard is locked from the outside. I don't know how, but they can. So the witch made her way out of the cupboard, and she was hopping mad. 'Checkmate!' she hissed. 'CHECKMATE???' she screeched. 'ME????

而是回到了坩埚里（她就是从那里开始的，这样就很诗意了），又把她绕到井里，把绳子扔在她身后。 如果他那样做了，那么一切都会好起来（请原谅我的双关语）。 因为即使是女巫也出不了井，因为她们没有翅膀。 但即使是最业余的女巫也能从橱柜里出来，即使他们没有钥匙，而且橱柜是从外面锁上的。 我不知道怎么回事，但他们可以。 于是女巫从橱柜里出来了，她气得跳了起来。 “将军!”她嘶嘶地说。“将军? ?她尖叫道。 “我? ?

That wretched, creeping, lucky, burglaring, lying little ACCIDENT! 'I'll learn him!' she yelled (witches' grammar isn't all that good). 'I'll learn him!' she screamed, and she picked the Hiccup pawn from the chessboard that was the cause of all the trouble and she threw it into the fire so it melted, and then she chucked the chessboard on the floor and she poured poison on it so it sizzled, all green and decaying and satisfying. A bit of a waste of time, really, but it was a relief to her feelings. 'Checkmate?' she whispered, calmer now. 'I think not, Hiccup Horrendous Haddock the Third, the game is not over yet, for I have yet a hand to play.' And then she dropped on all fours, and scuttled out the open door, nobody taking any more notice of her than a beetle, for the battle was in full flow. So in fact, Hiccup was wrong, the witch

那个可怜的、爬行的、幸运的、偷窃的、说谎的小意外！“我要教训教训他！”她喊道（女巫的语法可没那么好）。 “我要教训教训他！”她尖叫着，从棋盘上挑出了引起这一切麻烦的小嗝嗝的小兵，把它扔进火里，让它融化，然后她把棋盘扔在地板上，倒上毒药，让它嘶嘶作响，变成绿色，腐烂，令人满意。 有点浪费时间，真的，但这对她来说是一种解脱。 “将军?她低声说，现在平静多了。 “我认为还没有，嗝嗝，可怕的黑线鳕三世，游戏还没有结束，因为我还有一手牌要打。”然后她四肢着地，从敞开的门里窜了出去，没有人比甲虫更注意到她，因为战斗正在进行中。 所以事实上，小嗝嗝错了，那个女巫

HAD seen Alvin being beaten in battle by Stoick, and she scurried over like a great white crab, her long hair trailing on the boards behind her, to offer her motherly sympathy and consolation. 'LOSER!' screeched the witch. 'LOSER!'

她看到阿尔文在战斗中被斯托伊克打败了，她像一只大白蟹一样匆匆跑过来，她的长发在身后的木板上拖着，表示她慈母般的同情和安慰。 “失败者!女巫尖声说。 “失败者!”

Alvin jumped as if he had been bitten, looked down, and there she was. 'I beat Madguts on points so I came third,' he said defensively, 'you're never satisfied, that's pretty good actually– and you,' he said savagely, 'you were supposed to have got rid of Stoick and that revolting boy-nemesis of mine! I never promised I could defeat the boy-nemesis, did I? But you said, I'll deal with him. You said I have a way with clever little boys. You said he'll regret the day he ever was born. What happened? He's standing there, in the final, more born than ever!' 'He's immune to Vorpent poison!' screamed the witch. 'Why didn't you tell me? I said to tell me everything! How can I do my work unless you tell me everything? Being immune to Vorpent poison is a very important detail!' 'I didn't know,' replied Alvin the Treacherous, gloomily wiping some blood off his hand with the back of his sleeve. 'But it doesn't surprise me. I've been trying to kill him for years,* but he's so tricksy…' *See Hiccup's previous memoirs. How many times must I tell you! 'Third!' screamed the witch, back on that one again. 'I've got news for you, Loser-Boy! You don't get to be King of the Wilderwest if you come third!'

艾尔文像被咬了一样跳了起来，低头一看，她就在那里。 “我以分数击败了疯子队，所以我获得了第三名，”他为自己辩护，“你从来都不满足，这其实很不错——还有你，”他粗暴地说，“你应该除掉斯托伊克和我那个令人讨厌的死对头！我从没保证过我能打败那个男孩的宿敌，对吧？ 但你说过，我来对付他。 你说过我对聪明的小男孩很有一套。 你说他会后悔他出生的那一天。 发生了什么事?他站在那里，在决赛中，比以往任何时候都更有天赋！“他对毒蛇毒免疫！”女巫尖叫道。 “你为什么不告诉我？”我说了告诉我一切！除非你把一切都告诉我，否则我怎么工作？ 对毒蛇毒免疫是一个非常重要的细节！“我不知道。”背信弃义的阿尔文回答，一面忧郁地用袖子的背面擦去手上的血迹。 “但我并不感到惊讶。 多年来我一直想杀了他，*但他太狡猾了……”*参见Hiccup之前的回忆录。 我要告诉你多少次！“第三个!女巫尖叫着，又回到了那个问题上。 “我有消息要告诉你，废柴！”如果你得了第三名，你就不能成为最西部的国王了！”

A wicked thought came to her mid-rant. 'Actually,' said the witch, smiling evilly. She closed her eyes, and remembered something. The witch's eyesight had improved, you see, in the months since she'd left the tree prison. And she thought she had seen something in the hut that might prove a useful weapon… 'Actually… maybe you do. HA! Watch out, Mr Accident, the game isn't over yet…' And she scuttled off to see someone. You see? Things had taken a turn for the worse, all because Hiccup put a witch in a cupboard, and not down a well. One little mistake is all that it takes.

她在咆哮中突然产生了一个邪恶的念头。 “事实上，”女巫邪恶地笑着说。 她闭上眼睛，想起了什么。 你看，女巫离开树监狱后的几个月里，她的视力有了改善。 她想她在小屋里看到了什么东西，可能是一件有用的武器…… 哈!小心，意外先生，游戏还没结束呢……”说着，她匆匆跑去见人了。 你看到了什么?事情变得更糟了，这都是因为小嗝嗝把一个女巫关进了橱柜，而不是关进了井里。 只要犯一个小错误就够了。