3 Definitely NOT the Perfect Camping Spot

3. DEFINITELY NOT THE PERFECT CAMPING SPOT It could only be one of three things really. It could be the Ghost-Lady of the Beach come for their hearts. It could be a Berserk looking for another human to sacrifice. Or it could be an Uglithug wanting to kill them Horribly but Mercifully Quickly if they were Lucky. All three of those things were worth a pretty good scream, a real belter in fact, and Hiccup opened up his mouth. But a great hairy hand closed over it. Hiccup could only watch with terrified, popping eyes as quiet dark shadowy figures poured over the brow of the beach and positioned themselves silently behind every Hooligan's head. The figure in the Throne was shrouded in darkness. Hiccup could see the magnificent stag-horned outline of his helmet against the night sky. He was slowly smoking a

3. 绝对不是完美的露营地点它实际上只能是三种情况之一。 这可能是海滩上的女鬼来取他们的心。 可能是狂暴怪想再找个人献祭。 或者可能是一个丑陋的怪物想要可怕地杀死他们，但如果他们幸运的话，会很快地杀死他们。 这三件事都值得一声尖叫，实际上是一声真正的咆哮，小嗝嗝张开了嘴。 但是一只毛茸茸的大手抓住了它。 小嗝嗝只能惊恐地瞪大眼睛看着安静的黑影涌上海滩，静静地站在每个流氓的头后。 宝座上的身影笼罩在黑暗中。 小嗝嗝可以在夜空中看到他的头盔那雄伟的鹿角轮廓。 他慢慢地抽着烟

cigar that glowed bright in the moonlight. He made a motion with his hand, and every Hooligan around that campfire was awoken with a knife to his throat. Every Hooligan except for Stoick. Stoick snored on, regardless. The figure seated in the Throne got up and strolled towards the sleeping Stoick. He gave him a gentle kick. Stoick the Vast snatched the bearskin blanket from his head and sat up indignantly. 'Wossat? Who's there?' He made a sleepy grab for his axe. The horned figure made another slight gesture with his hand, and quiet shadowy figures drew the Throne closer to the Fire. 'UG the Uglithug! What are YOU doing here?' gulped Stoick the Vast, his axe already drooping in his hand in dismay that all of his Warriors had knives held at their throats. Stoick the Vast was a little slow on the uptake, but even he could see it didn't look good. They were on Uglithug land, and the chewed bones of Uglithug mackerel were littered all around their campfire. 'Well you know, Stoick,' purred UG the Uglithug.

在月光下闪闪发光的雪茄。 他用手做了个动作，营火周围的每个流氓都被一把刀指着喉咙惊醒了。 每个流氓，除了斯托克。 斯托伊克不顾一切地继续打呼噜。 坐在宝座上的人站起来，向熟睡的斯托伊克走去。 他轻轻地踢了他一脚。 巨人斯托伊克一把夺过头上的熊皮毯子，愤怒地坐了起来。 “Wossat ?谁在那?”他睡意朦胧地伸手去拿他的斧头。 长角的身影又轻轻做了个手势，一个个安静的影子把王座拉向火堆。 “丑八怪！”你在这里做什么？巨人斯托伊克吞吞吐吐地说，他手里的斧头已经低垂下来了，因为他手下所有的勇士都被刀抵住了喉咙。 巨人斯托伊克的反应有点迟钝，但就连他也能看出情况不妙。 他们在Uglithug的土地上，他们的营火周围到处都是被嚼碎的Uglithug鲭鱼骨头。 “好吧，你知道的，斯托伊克。”

His smile was the smile of a tiger being friendly. 'It is MY beach…' Most of the Chieftains Hiccup had come across were tough but a little dim. UG was scary because he was not only the most powerful and brutal King in the Barbaric World, whose territories stretched so far that a dragon could fly east for a week and never reach the end of them, he was also highly intelligent. 'I can explain, UG!' gasped Stoick the Vast. 'Live and let live is my philosophy, Stoick,' smiled UG the Uglithug. 'All you Chieftains out there in the wild west are burglars. If you want to burgle each other, and raid each other, and murder each other, do I interfere? I do not. As long as you don't try and burgle ME,' said UG, who had stopped laughing with terrible abruptness and now spoke with pure menace, 'because then that is my business. If anyone tries to burgle ME, then…' UG let the sentence trail off suggestively. '…Then you kill them Horribly,' said Stoick eagerly, pleased he now knew what UG was talking about, 'but Mercifully Quickly if they're Lucky. Yes, I know that, UG…' 'Well done, Stoick, well done,' said UG. 'I'm glad to hear it. But you see, Stoick, my Spy-dragons tell me

他的微笑是老虎友好的微笑。 “这是我的海滩……”小嗝嗝遇到的大多数酋长都很坚强，但有点糊涂。 UG之所以可怕，不仅因为他是野蛮世界里最强大、最残忍的国王，他的领土辽阔到一条龙可以向东飞一个星期也到不了尽头，而且他还非常聪明。 “我可以解释，UG!”巨人斯托伊克喘着气说。 “自己活，也让别人活，这是我的哲学，斯托伊克。” “你们这些蛮荒西部的土司都是强盗。 如果你们想互相抢劫，互相抢劫，互相谋杀，我要干涉吗？ 我没有。“只要你不偷我的东西就行，”格格说，他突然大笑起来，吓得要命，现在完全是威胁地说，“因为那是我的事。 如果有人想偷我的东西，那么……” “……然后你残忍地杀死他们，”斯托伊克急切地说，很高兴他现在知道UG在说什么了，“但如果他们幸运的话，又能仁慈地迅速地杀死他们。 “干得好，斯托伊克，干得好，”格格说。 “听你这么说我很高兴。但是你看，斯托伊克，我的间谍龙告诉我

that you have come here, uninvited, in the middle of the night, with all your army…' He gestured at Stoick's ships with his cigar. 'A suspicious man might say that by planting your Throne on my beaches you are laying claim to my lands. Some people might say that wasn't very friendly…' 'No, no, UG, it isn't like that!' blustered Stoick the Vast. 'That isn't my Throne! We just found it lying here on the beach!' UG the Uglithug smiled, and it wasn't a pretty sight. 'You are an old friend, Stoick,' said UG, and now his voice had hardened to ice, 'but even your friends would say that you have never been the brightest barbarian in the business. If it isn't your Throne, why is the Hooligan coat of arms plastered all over the back of it?' UG leant back in the Throne and jammed his cigar back between his teeth. He lifted his arm. Hiccup could see that all the Uglithugs, their knives poised over the Hooligans' throats, had their eyes on that arm, and he knew that if UG's arm came down, they would all be executed on the spot. Hiccup bit the finger of the brute who was covering his mouth, and shouted: 'BIG-BOOBIED BERTHA KNOWS WE ARE HERE!'

你大半夜不请自来，带着你所有的军队来到这里……”他用雪茄指着斯托伊克的船。 “一个多疑的人可能会说，你把王座放在我的海滩上，就是在要求占有我的土地。 “不，不，UG，不是那样的！”巨人斯托伊克吼道。 “那不是我的宝座！”我们刚发现它躺在海滩上！”丑格怪笑了，这可不是什么好看的景象。 “你是我的老朋友了，斯托伊克，”格格说，现在他的声音变得冷冰冰了，“但即使是你的朋友也会说，你从来都不是这个行业里最聪明的野蛮人。 如果这不是您的王座，为什么它的背后到处都是流氓的纹章呢？”UG向后靠在宝座上，把雪茄塞进牙缝里。 他举起手臂。小嗝嗝可以看到，所有的乌格立陶宛人都把刀悬在流氓的脖子上，眼睛都盯着那只胳膊，他知道，如果乌格的胳膊掉下来，他们都会被当场处决。 小嗝嗝咬住了那只捂着他嘴的畜生的手指，喊道：“大咪咪伯莎知道我们在这里！”

UG the Uglithug's cigar hovered thoughtfully in the air. 'Let the boy speak,' said UG the Uglithug at last. The Uglithug holding Hiccup let him go, and he sprawled on the sand. 'And who,' said UG softly, 'is this?' 'This is my son and Heir, Hiccup Horrendous Haddock the Third,' said Stoick the Vast hurriedly. 'That's a very long name for a very small Heir,' said UG. 'And what do you have to say for yourself, Hiccup Horrendous Haddock the Third?' 'This is not a raid. We are out looking for Bertha's child who went missing in the Storm,' said Hiccup. 'That Throne, if you look at it closely, has been underwater for at least a hundred years. It must have belonged to one of our ancestors and been washed up by the storm. And Big-Boobied Bertha will ask some awkward questions if the entire Hooligan Tribe disappears while on a perfectly peaceful mission in Uglithug territory.' UG the Uglithug looked carefully at Hiccup. 'I could tell her it was all a tragic mistake,' said UG the Uglithug, stroking his beard. 'Questions would be asked,' repeated Hiccup firmly. 'Suspicions would be raised. Bodies would

丑八怪的雪茄若有所思地在空中盘旋。 “让那孩子说话吧。”丑八怪格格最后说。 抱着嗝嗝的丑怪放开了他，嗝嗝躺在沙滩上。 “这是谁？”UG轻声说。“这是我的儿子和继承人，西卡普·可怕的黑线鳕三世，”巨人斯托伊克急忙说。 “对于一个很小的继承人来说，这个名字太长了，”UG说。 “你有什么要为自己辩解的吗，小嗝嗝，可怕的黑线鳕三世？”“这不是突袭。” “我们出去找伯莎的孩子，他在暴风雨中失踪了。”希卡普说。 “如果你仔细看，那座王座已经在水下至少有一百年了。 它一定属于我们的某位祖先，被风暴冲走了。 如果整个流氓部落在Uglithug领地执行和平任务时消失，那么大奶子伯莎会问一些尴尬的问题。”丑八怪格格仔细地看着嗝嗝。 “我可以告诉她这一切都是一个悲惨的错误，”丑格格摸着胡子说。 “他们会问问题的，”小嗝嗝坚定地重复道。 人们会产生怀疑。 身体会

be difficult to hide.' 'A clever little Hooligan,' said UG thoughtfully. 'A politician, in fact. In the Hooligan Tribe! Well, there's an interesting development.' He smoked his cigar in the darkness of the evening for a moment or two. UG the Uglithug spread wide his arms. 'I believe you, Stoick!' he shouted. He shook Stoick heartily by the hand. The entire Uglithug Tribe removed their knives from the Hooligans' throats and took a step back. 'Do you?' said Stoick, letting out a huge breath of relief, but slightly amazed. 'I DO!' bellowed UG. 'I WAS NEVER GOING TO KILL YOU! IT WAS JUST A JOKE!' 'A joke?' said Stoick. 'HA HA HA!' roared UG the Uglithug. 'Ha ha ha,' replied Stoick. 'HA HA HA HA HA,' roared the Uglithugs and the Hooligans, some of them more heartily than others. 'I HAD A COMPLETELY DIFFERENT REASON FOR COMING DOWN HERE TO SPEAK TO YOU! ISN'T THAT FUNNY?' laughed UG the Uglithug.

要难以隐藏。“一个聪明的小流氓，”UG若有所思地说。 “实际上是一个政治家。在流氓部落！嗯，有一个有趣的进展。”他在夜色中抽了一会儿雪茄。 丑八怪张开双臂。 “我相信你，斯托伊克！”他喊道。 他热情地握着斯托伊克的手。 整个Uglithug部落都把刀从流氓的喉咙里拿了出来，退了一步。 “你?斯托伊克说，松了一口气，但有点吃惊。 “我做的!UG吼道。“我从来没打算杀你！”那只是个玩笑！“开玩笑？”斯托伊克说。 “哈哈哈！丑八怪UG吼道。 “哈哈哈，”斯托伊克回答。 “哈哈哈，哈哈哈，”乌合之众和流氓们咆哮着，其中一些人比另一些人更热情。 “我到这儿来跟你说话完全是另有原因的！”这不是很有趣吗？丑八怪笑着说。