18 Why No One Steals from Madguts

18. WHY NO ONE STEALS FROM MADGUTS Madguts gestured towards his henchman, Gumboil, who always did his talking for him. 'Madguts is interested to hear, Bertha,' sneered Gumboil, while everybody gave a horrified gasp and tried not to breathe in too deeply, 'that you feel there are some people it would be unwise to nick things from. Because he would have thought that he would be one of those people.' 'Oh, you are, Madguts,

18. 为什么没人从疯子那里偷东西？疯子指了指他的心腹Gumboil，他总是替他说话。 “疯子很想知道，伯莎，”Gumboil冷笑着说，这时每个人都惊恐地倒吸了一口气，尽量不把气吸得太深，“你觉得有些人偷东西是不明智的。 因为他会想到他会成为那些人中的一员。“哦，你是疯了，”

you are,' Bertha assured him, keeping a wary eye on that sword. Now, Big-Boobied Bertha was a frightening woman whose gigantic breasts and super-strong sword-arm were the Terror of the Archipelago. However, even those Boobies knew when they were beaten, and they drooped in a depressed way as Bertha, tough but not all that BRIGHT, searched for a convincing explanation as to what exactly she was doing with Madguts's Stealth Dragon. Gumboil carried on. 'Anybody who steals from Madguts has the most unpleasant fate of being taken to the Ugli-thug Slavelands… or sacrificed to Sky Dragons, depending on whether Madguts is in a merciful mood. What are you doing with Madguts's Stealth Dragon, Big-Boobied Bertha?' Bertha had been trying to stand between

你是。”伯莎向他保证，警惕地盯着那把剑。 现在，大胸伯莎是一个可怕的女人，她巨大的乳房和超级强壮的剑臂是群岛的恐怖。 然而，即使是那些鲣鸟也知道自己什么时候被打败了，当伯莎坚强但不那么聪明的时候，他们沮丧地垂下了头，寻找一个令人信服的解释，解释她到底在用疯子的隐形龙做什么。 Gumboil继续着。“任何从Madguts那里偷东西的人都有最不愉快的命运，要么被带到丑陋的奴隶地……要么被献祭给天龙，这取决于Madguts是否仁慈。” 你和疯子的隐形龙在一起干什么，大胸伯莎？”伯莎一直想挡在中间

Madguts and the Stealth Dragon, in the pathetic hope that Madguts would not notice it, but on seeing its Master, the Stealth Dragon had leapt to its feet, and slunk to Madguts's side. 'SIT!' barked Gumboil, and the Stealth Dragon instantly sat. 'You see?' whispered Toothless in the Stormfly's ear. 'He's a real goody-goody!' 'He is, isn't he?' replied Stormfly disapprovingly. She sighed. 'And he's working for a real baddy-baddy… baddy... a very STINKY baddy-baddy at that… I can't think WHAT I saw in him…' 'Well, Bertha?' said Gumboil, as Madguts toyed with his axe. 'What is your answer?' There was a nasty silence. Hiccup gave a tactful cough. 'Um, Chief Murderous, sir,' he said politely, 'I think you might be making a little mistake here…' Madguts the Murderous frowned thunderously. 'Very understandable, I'm sure,' said Hiccup, hurriedly, 'but this is not what it looks like. Me and my friends have just been stealing a book from the Meathead Public Library, and the person who chased us on the back of this Stealth Dragon, and who must have stolen it in the first place, was not Big-Boobied

Madguts和隐形龙，可怜的希望Madguts不会注意到它，但是看到它的主人，隐形龙已经跳起来，溜到Madguts的身边。 “坐!”Gumboil吼道，隐形龙立刻坐了下来。 “你看到了什么?无牙在风暴苍蝇耳边低语。 “他真是个老好人！”“是的，不是吗？”暴风虻不以为然地回答。 她叹了口气。“而且他在为一个真正的大坏蛋工作……大坏蛋……” 我真不明白我到底看上了他什么。”甘伯说，麦胆正在玩弄他的斧头。 “你的回答是什么？”一阵令人讨厌的沉默。 嗝嗝巧妙地咳了一声。 “嗯，首席杀人魔，先生，”他礼貌地说，“我想你可能犯了一个小错误……” “我相信这是可以理解的，”小嗝嗝急忙说，“但事情并不是看上去的那样。 我和我的朋友们刚刚从蠢蛋公共图书馆偷了一本书，那个骑着隐形龙追我们的人，肯定是最先偷书的人，不是大咪咪

Bertha but the Hairy Scary Librarian…' Hiccup pointed to the prone and squashed figure of the Hairy Scary Librarian. He was still alive, but gently slumbering in the heather. '…Big-Boobied Bertha was in the middle of arresting him when you arrived.' 'Brilliant…' whispered Camicazi under her breath. 'That's brilliant… for a boy of course…' The Hairy Scary Librarian would have hotly denied this charge, but the Hairy Scary Librarian was in no condition to deny anything, as he slumbered peacefully on, out for the count. 'In fact,' continued Hiccup, 'you should really be thanking Big-Boobied Bertha here, because the moment she clapped eyes on the creature, she knew that such a splendid Secret Weapon could only belong to a magnificent Murderous Chieftain such as yourself, sir–which is why she squashed him. Isn't that right, Bertha?' 'Oh, ah… yes,' said Big-Boobied Bertha hurriedly, 'that's absolutely right.' Everybody held their breaths as Madguts the Murderous looked from Hiccup to Big-Boobied Bertha to the slumbering Librarian, from out of his mean blue eyes, as cold and cruel as the ocean itself.

“伯莎，除了可怕的毛图书管理员……”嗝嗝指着可怕的毛图书管理员趴在地上被压扁的身子。 他还活着，但在石楠丛中轻轻地睡着了。 “……你来的时候，大咪咪伯莎正在逮捕他。“太棒了……”卡米卡齐压低声音说。 可怕的毛图书管理员会激烈地否认这一指控，但可怕的毛图书管理员没有能力否认任何事情，他继续平静地睡着了。 “事实上，”小嗝嗝继续说，“你应该感谢这里的大奶子伯莎，因为她一看到这个家伙，就知道这么了不起的秘密武器只属于像你这样的凶残的酋长，先生——这就是她把他压扁的原因。 对吗，伯莎？“哦，啊……是的，”大胸伯莎赶紧说，“完全正确。”杀人狂从小嗝嗝、大胸伯莎和熟睡的图书管理员身上看了看，每个人都屏住了呼吸，他那双刻薄的蓝眼睛像大海一样冷酷无情。

He chewed thoughtfully on his knuckle-bone for a moment or two, and then he advanced towards Bertha with his terrifying sword gleaming in his hand. Bertha raised her head bravely, for a Bog-Burglar laughs in the face of death, and looked Madguts straight in the eye as she waited for the final blow… …And to her astonishment, Madguts GAVE her the sword. And then Madguts leaned over, spat in the heather, and motioned to his henchman. He grunted something in the Gumboil's ear, and then, without a word, he climbed up on to the Stealth Dragon's back,

他若有所思地嚼了一会儿指关节骨，然后向伯莎走去，手里拿着那把闪闪发光的可怕的剑。 伯莎勇敢地抬起头，因为沼泽夜贼面对死亡是会笑的。她在等待最后一击... ...时，直视着麦德林的眼睛。令她吃惊的是，麦德林把剑给了她。 然后麦德古斯俯下身来，朝石南丛啐了口唾沫，示意他的心腹。 他对着Gumboil的耳朵咕哝了一声，然后一言不发地爬上了隐形龙的背上，

and the beautiful creature sprang into the air, turning in an instant from as green as the heather to as blue as the sky, and was gone. 'Madguts gives you his sword in thanks for your services in capturing the fool who tried to steal his Stealth Dragon,' sneered Gumboil. 'He seems to believe your story… I don't, mind you, but Madguts is the boss. GUARDS!' screamed the Gumboil, removing the Heart-Slicers from the Librarian's sword- belt, and adding them to his own. 'TAKE THIS DOZY LIBRARIAN OFF TO THE UGLI-THUG SLAVELANDS!' The Guards snapped to attention, and one of their dragons took the limp body of the unconscious Librarian in-between its claws and flew off with it towards the west. The Hairy Scary Librarian would wake up many hours later, deep in the heart of the Ugli-thug Slavelands, rather thinner than he was before, and with a thumping headache, and his temper would not be improved once he realised where he was. Lest there are any soft-hearted readers out there, who are worrying about his unjust fate, I should remind you that he was a singularly unpleasant character who had dispatched many an unfortunate

这个美丽的生物跳上了天空，瞬间从石南花一样的绿色变成了天空一样的蓝色，然后消失了。 “疯子把他的剑送给你，以感谢你抓住了那个试图偷走他的隐形龙的傻瓜。”Gumboil冷笑着说。 “他似乎相信你的话……我不相信，提醒你一下，但疯子才是老板。” 卫兵!Gumboil尖叫着，把切心刀从图书管理员的剑腰带上取下来，装在自己的剑腰带上。 “把这个昏昏沉沉的图书管理员带到丑陋暴徒的奴隶之地去！”卫兵们迅速立正，他们的一条巨龙用爪子夹住失去知觉的图书管理员软弱无力的身体，带着他向西飞去了。 那个毛茸茸的可怕的图书管理员会在许多小时后醒来，在丑陋暴徒的奴隶之地的深处，比以前瘦多了，头痛得厉害，即使他意识到自己在哪里，他的脾气也不会好转。 为了避免有心软的读者担心他不公正的命运，我应该提醒你，他是一个特别令人讨厌的角色，他曾杀死过许多不幸的人