6 HICCUP’S BARDIGUARD HAS A BUSY TIME

6. HICCUP'S BARDIGUARD HAS A BUSY TIME Stoick rather regretted hiring Humungous over the next couple of weeks. Everybody, including Hiccup, seemed to think he was absolutely marvelous. He autographed axes, spears, favorite dragons, even Baggybum's famous beerbelly. "Even his WRITING is humungously cool," sighed Baggybum, gazing down at the stylish scrawl on his tummy. "I'll never wash again..." "Did you ever?" grunted Stoick, thinking, Who does this Humungous guy think he IS? And that was the other thing. Everybody normally followed Stoick's lead where it came to fashion. That meant the beard was worn au naturel, in a tremendous tangly mess the size of a large and complicated bird's nest that had recently been

6. 在接下来的几个星期里，斯托伊克非常后悔雇佣了humunous。 每个人，包括小嗝嗝，似乎都认为他绝对是了不起的。 他在斧头、长矛、最爱的龙，甚至是Baggybum著名的啤酒肚上签名。 Baggybum低头看着自己肚子上时髦的涂鸦，叹道：“就连他写的字都非常酷。” “我再也不洗了……” “你有过吗？”斯托伊克咕噜着，心想，“这个巨大的家伙以为自己是谁？” 这是另一件事。 在时尚方面，每个人通常都跟随斯托伊克的脚步。 这意味着他的胡子是自然的，乱成一团，就像一个大而复杂的鸟巢一样大

attacked by a weasel. The whole was then decorated with a lavish sprinkling of food droppings. Suddenly, everybody was appearing with their beards immaculately groomed, just like Humungous's, and the ends of the moustaches elaborately twiddled and coaxed in pretty little curls. And Stoick strongly suspected they were WASHING, not to mention doing up their shirt buttons, and polishing their helmets till they shone.

被黄鼠狼袭击了。然后用大量的食物粪便装饰整个房间。 突然，每个人都出现了，他们的胡子修剪得一干二净，就像胡蒙一样，胡子的末端被精心地捻成漂亮的小卷发。 斯托伊克强烈怀疑他们在洗衣服，更不用说他们在系衬衫纽扣，把头盔擦得闪闪发光了。

"What have you done to your beard?" Stoick demanded of a rather guilty-looking Gobber, whose haystack had turned into a riot of ringlets overnight. Gobber blushed. "Oh this..." said Gobber carelessly. "It's just the latest fashion, you know... more HEROIC... Everybody's doing it." "Well, you all look ridiculous," blustered Stoick.

“你的胡子怎么了？”斯托伊克问满脸愧疚的戈贝尔，他的干草堆一夜之间变成了一团乱麻。 采空区脸红了。“哦,这……” 戈伯漫不经心地说。“你知道，这只是最新的时尚…… 更多的英雄……每个人都在这么做。” “好吧，你们看起来都很可笑，”斯托伊克咆哮道。

But what he found by far the most difficult part of the whole Bardiguard business, was that Hiccup seemed to look up to Humungous so much. It was all "Humungous this" and "Humungous that" nowadays. Indeed, Hiccup did admire Humungous. Here was a Hero a cut above the usual uncouth Barbarian. His fighting wasn't just the usual loutish bonking on the head, but stylish, elegant, graceful. He taught Hiccup the Flash-thrust-with-twist thingummy, and showed him how to tie an opponent into elaborate and beautiful knots, while at the same time courteously inquiring about the state of their health. But Humungous was causing Hiccup the odd little difficulty, not his fault, of course, but there it was. Hiccup's general practice on the Pirate Training Program was to try and blend into the background and hope that nobody noticed him. But this is difficult if an exceptionally good-looking six-foot-seven internationally renowned Hero is following two steps behind you with his sword drawn and shouting out, "MAKE WAY FOR HICCUP HORRENDOUS HADDOCK THE THIRD, ONLY SON OF THE CHIEF!" And there were other problems.

但是，他发现整个巴第瓜的事情中最困难的地方是，小嗝嗝似乎非常尊敬humhumous。 现在到处都是“这个大”和“那个大”。 事实上，小嗝嗝确实很欣赏Humungous。 这是一个英雄，比一般粗野的野蛮人略胜一筹。 他的打斗不只是平常那种愚蠢的撞头，而是时髦、优雅、优雅。 他教小嗝嗝“闪插扭”，教他如何把对手打成精致漂亮的结，同时礼貌地询问他们的健康状况。 但是胡蒙给小嗝嗝制造了一个奇怪的小麻烦，当然这不是他的错，但事情就是这样。 小嗝嗝在海盗训练计划中的一般做法是尽量融入背景，希望没有人注意到他。 但是，如果一个长得特别好看的六英尺七英寸的国际知名英雄在你后面两步，拿着剑，喊道：“让路给嗝嗝，可怕的黑线鳕，酋长的第三个儿子！”还有其他问题。

Gobber allowed the boys a bit of time off to recover from their Herding-Reindeer-on-Dragonback lesson, and then it was back to the normal Program a day or so later, and an Axe-fighting-with-Art lesson. The strange weather had, if anything, gotten even hotter. How hot could it get? It was like standing in the middle of an oven. The boys stood in a straggly line in front of Gobber, scratching their bottoms and sweating profusely. Above them towered Huge Hill, like a bad omen, its lower half alive with trees and ferns, its upper half a scalded desert, as bald and nude as Gobber's still-helmetless-and-now-very-sunburned head. When Gobber the Belch asked for volunteers to fight Snotface Snotlout, there was a stony silence among the boys. Snotlout was horribly good at Axe- fighting, and he was a terrible cheat who tended to kick you in the ankles with his specially sharpened sandals when Gobber wasn't looking. So imagine Hiccup's horror when Humungous stepped forward, shouting out, "I VOLUNTEER HICCUP HORRENDOUS HADDOCK THE THIRD, ONLY SON OF CHIEF STOICK THE VAST, O HEAR HIS NAME AND TREMBLE, UGH UGH!" "SShhhhhh..." begged Hiccup. "Please...

戈伯给了孩子们一段时间，让他们从“在龙背上放驯鹿”的课程中恢复过来，过了一天左右，他们又回到了正常的课程中，上了一节用斧头格斗的艺术课。 奇怪的天气反而变得更热了。 它能有多热？就像站在烤箱中间一样。 男孩们零零散散地站在戈伯面前，挠着屁股，大汗淋漓。 在他们的头顶上耸立着一座巨丘，像个凶兆，它的下半部分长满了树木和蕨类植物，而上半部分则是一片炙热的沙漠，光秃秃的，就像戈伯那还没戴头盔，现在已经晒得很黑的脑袋一样。 当打嗝哥伯请求大家自愿与鼻涕脸鼻鼻子战斗时，男孩们沉默了一会儿。 鼻鼻子非常擅长用斧头，他是个可怕的骗子，经常趁戈伯不注意的时候，用他特别磨尖的凉鞋踢你的脚踝。 所以想象一下，当Humungous走上前来，大声喊道：“我志愿Hiccup，可怕的黑线鳕，第三个，巨大的STOICK酋长的独子，听到他的名字，颤抖，哈哈！”“SShhhhhh……” 恳求打嗝。“请…