3 The Hunters Become the Hunted

3. THE HUNTERS BECOME THE HUNTED Open-mouthed, almost in a trance, Hiccup watched the furious frantic progress of his friend down the mountainside. 'YOU HORRIBLE HALITOSIS HADDOCK!' shrieked Fishlegs in a frenzy. 'YOU PATHETIC PIECES OF PLANKTON! I CAN SEE YOU– YOU'RE BLUBBING LIKE BABIES AT THE THOUGHT OF FIGHTING A REAL VIKING!' One Eye, the Sabre-Tooth Driver Dragon, was watching Fishlegs with something approaching awe. 'You know, I underestimated your friend,' he grunted respectfully. 'I thought he was a complete weed, but I have to admit, that is BRAVE… Suicidal, of course, but definitely brave…' The Hysterics were so completely amazed to find themselves being attacked out of the blue by a single, undersized, under-age member of another Tribe that for a moment they just froze, jaws hanging open, hands filled with deer halfway to their mouths. Fishlegs skied straight at the Hysterics, swinging his sword furiously when he got amongst them,

but missing of course, and skiing straight over their campfire and on down the hill. For a moment his furs caught on fire, but the wind blew them out again. The Hysterics paused for one second in their astonishment as they watched the small shrieking figure careering down the mountainside. They then looked at one another, and you didn't need to see their faces to know that it was a grim, Let's-Murder- Him-Now sort of look. They fastened on their skis in a businesslike, unhurried fashion, hoisted their bows on to their enormous hairy shoulders, and set off after him. 'Oh, by the Bouncing Buttocks of Beaming Baldur,' panicked Hiccup, setting off down the slope after Fishlegs, 'they're going to kill him, aren't they? What am I going to do?' 'Do?' asked One Eye, bounding beside Hiccup in long easy strides. 'There's nothing you can do… your friend is as good as dead… he's what we in the Sabre-Tooth Pack would call a Walking Corpse… or a SKIING Corpse in his case. There's nothing you can do, and if you ski in this direction YOU may end up dead too…' It looked like the dragon was right. Hiccup was working hard to keep up with the Hysterics. Hysterics are enormous and very strong skiers indeed.

And Fishlegs was travelling at a very fast speed himself, on account of not doing anything fancy like TURNING, admittedly totally out of control, and it was amazing he hadn't fallen over already. Hiccup could see him twisting his head every now and again to shout more insults over his shoulder. The Hysterics were gaining, and one Big Brute carrying a gigantic, double-headed, black and gold axe, fastened an arrow to his bow. Hiccup screeched to a stop, sending out a fan of snow. He fixed an arrow to his own bow. 'Oh my horns and whiskers!' squealed Toothless. 'He's going to d-d-do something! Don't d-d- do it, Hiccup! Don't do it!' Hiccup took careful aim, and let go of the arrow, which sailed through the air, and hit the Big Brute with the Axe who was about to shoot Fishlegs, right bang splat in the bottom.

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It was the first successful hit Hiccup had had all morning. 'Good shot!' roared One Eye, enjoying himself hugely. The Big Brute with the Axe let out a roar, and his arms flailed around wildly. He let fly his own arrow, which, in a streak of glorious luck, soared in a perfect arc… straight into the bottom of the Hysteric skiing in front of him. 'Oh, this is too good…' breathed One Eye. 'Pinch me… it must be my birthday…' That Hysteric then screamed in pain, and pitched forward into a complete somersault, taking out the Hysteric in front of him, who slid on his back into the legs of the last three Hysterics, upturning them like skittles, and all SIX Hysterics ended up in a groaning, tangled, furious, snowy heap. 'Good, good,' muttered Hiccup. 'Now, please make all six of them follow me, not Fishlegs.' 'I think they will!' cried One Eye, crying with laughter, 'Oh, I think they will…' 'OVER HERE!' yelled Hiccup, making quite sure they saw who had caused their downfall, and then for

good measure, 'IF YOU'RE NOT AFRAID OF BEING SHOT, YOU… WRIGGLING RUFFIAN RUBBISH!' 'Look what you've d-d-done!' moaned Toothless. 'Those Hysterics are going to be so m-m- mad!' Mad those Hysterics certainly were, as mad as fire, and Hiccup set off down the mountain like a little bolt of lightning. 'We've got a head start,' panted Hiccup, skiing faster than he ever had done in his entire life. 'But it's not going to be enough,' gloated One Eye with relish. 'You've got half the mountain to ski down, and they're going to catch up.' Sure enough, a horribly short time afterwards, Hiccup could hear the Hysterics beginning their pursuit behind him. Five of the Hysterics were howling the Hysterical Howl like a pack of insane high-pitched wolves, and the sixth, the one with the Axe, was screaming more personal insults. 'How DARE you assault MY Royal Buttocks, you midget Hooligan Assassin! We Hysterics are the best Hunters in the entire world, and when I get hold of you I shall chop you with my Chopper and feed you to the